http://www.animelyrics.com/anime/shi...invitation.htm
Firstly great job to Chokoreeto and animeyay
However, there are a few things I feel should be corrected or at least addressed. Secondly... I hope I'm doing this right. I'm new to this and just thought I'd throw in my two cents about this translation.
Original Line: 話題のカフェがどこなのかをリサーチ (wadai no kafe ga doko na no ka o risaachi)
Original translation: "I'll need to research the location of this famous cafe."
Fixed translation:
The cafe everyone’s talking about, I’ll do some research to find out where it is
Reason being:
I would refrain from using the word 'famous' because the word for famous isn't in there. Wadai means topic or subject as in the topic of conversation.
Original line: 今日もBBSネットをひらい ティータイム (kyou mo BBS netto o hirai tiitaimu)
Original translation: "Today, too, when I log onto the bulletin board on the internet,"
Fixed translation:
Today, on the BBS net, we had tea time again
Reason being:
I'm not sure why you left out the fact that 'tea time' is directly said. I feel as it is part of the lyrics it should be part of the translation.
Original line: ぜひぜひ 日頃の疲れを (zehizehi higoro no tsukare o)
original translation: "Please, by all means, relieve your tension and tiredness"
Fixed translation:
Please, by all means, relieve the fatigue of your daily life
Reason being:
Hirogo means daily or everyday. Again, I think it should be part of the translation, because the word is there.
Original line: 飲もう モカ ラテ オレ チャイ (nomou moka rate ore chai)
Original translation: "Let's drink! Mocha, latte, ole, chai,"
Fixed translation:
Let's drink a mocha, latte, au lait, or chai
Reason being:
haha I'm pretty sure Ore is referring to a Café au lait which is pronounce [kafe o lɛ] (sounds like ole)
Original Line: ノー ノー ノー これじゃキープオン
Original translation: "No! No! No! I need you to stay on!"
Fixed translation:
No, no, no, I need to keep on with this.
Reason being:
The original lyrics literally say 'no no no this then/if this is the case, keep on'. I don't think 'I need you to stay on' would be an appropriate translation for this.
Boku ni invitation.txt
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