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Thread: Smile

  1. #1
    Senior Member .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~'s Avatar
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    Default Smile

    so this is like the only happy poem in the bottomless pit of poetry in my bookbag, so enjoy (meh 100th post)

    I love it wheen he looks at me
    eyes are shining blue
    I love it when he says my name
    like I don't have a clue
    I love it when he holds me tight
    so dreams are happy in bliss
    I loved it when he touched my lips
    and gave me my first kiss
    I love when he comes over at night
    and hope he stays a while
    But most of all I love one thing,
    his beautiful, wonderful smile!

    You're like an angel from a picture book...

  2. #2
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    Gil
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    Congrats on 100 posts =]

    Anyways, another good poem. Not as good as some of the others, but still very grand to read.

    Rating - 8/10
    Nonon Jakuzure - Best Kill la Kill bae
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    Pretty damn great! #spoke2soon

  3. #3
    Senior Member .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~'s Avatar
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    yeah, ^.^;; not so good on the happy poetry... but i tried..

    You're like an angel from a picture book...

  4. #4
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    It had kind of a cute childish rhythm to it, so I thought that added more cuteness to your poem. I thought it was an okay poem, but I've seen you do better. Just continue to write more and you'll get better.

  5. #5
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    I liked it. The rhyming was good and I loved the story being told. Cute! ^^



    Every great work of art has two faces, one toward its own time and one toward the future, toward eternity.
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  6. #6
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    it had a kind of innocence to it, very cutesy.it was nice; rhyming and kinda sing songy.

  7. #7
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    ^^ mmhmm, cute.


  8. #8
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    I liked it! I'm the only dude I know that's likes poetry(I'm not gay)

  9. #9
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    I liked it, though it does remind you of a kiddy poem it's still cute!!
    LOVE YA: HEG <33 PON, KIBUM <3

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  10. #10
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    You did really good!
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  11. #11
    Senior Member .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~ has a reputation beyond repute .Miki~'s Avatar
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    it was supposed to have a cutsey side to it, I thought it would be fun, but its the only one I have written like it, so I dont expect to write more in its nature... Thank you all for your comments, I appreciate them.

    You're like an angel from a picture book...

  12. #12
    Bringer of Chaos ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu has a reputation beyond repute ZukaxxMimozu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hinamori~ View Post
    it was supposed to have a cutsey side to it, I thought it would be fun, but its the only one I have written like it, so I dont expect to write more in its nature... Thank you all for your comments, I appreciate them.
    Sure, anytime

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