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Thread: Winter

  1. #1
    Manic Shot WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default Winter

    It's snowing outside every day
    Winter came with pride again
    Time to cheer,time to play
    For every woman,every man


    Cold it's outside,the lakes iced
    Inside it's warm and light
    Oh winter,you shall be praised
    On the sky the stars shine bright


    Time to sing and eat together
    To fill your heart with joy
    Memories to last for forever
    And wait for the angel's boy


    (c)WinterDream
    Last edited by WinterDream; 01-06-2009 at 11:34 AM.
    You call it madness, but I call it love.(Byas)


  2. #2
    Faded Existence Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein* has a reputation beyond repute Rein*'s Avatar
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    First line second stanza " Cold it's outside,the lakes iced" would have been better or made more sense if it read " Cold is outside, lakes iced or even Cold it is outside" because the sentence is in an objective state. but the poem was good it flowed well.

  3. #3
    Manic Shot WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream's Avatar
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    Thanks,Rein.I actually think it'll stay like that though.
    You call it madness, but I call it love.(Byas)


  4. #4
    Nanobyte's minion SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD's Avatar
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    Hey, this is the first time I've seen you on the poetry forum. Awesome.

    I know you're a beginner, so I thought your poem was pretty good. It had some good imagery, but you might want to work on the flow. My favorite lines were the first two, and the last one. Once again, you've shown how much you adore the snow and freezing temperatures.

    I hope you continue to write more.

  5. #5
    SOS Brigade Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita's Avatar
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    I loved the poem. It had awesome imagery and as I read it, it actually felt like I was outside.....BRRRR! LOL I find the best thing about any poem is that if it is written well, you can feel the poem and be inside of the poem. (I wonder if anyone understands that...) ^^



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  6. #6
    The Bringer of Nightmares RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169 has a reputation beyond repute RJ169's Avatar
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    Default

    pretty good

  7. #7
    Nanobyte's minion SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by angel_alchemist9 View Post
    I loved the poem. It had awesome imagery and as I read it, it actually felt like I was outside.....BRRRR! LOL I find the best thing about any poem is that if it is written well, you can feel the poem and be inside of the poem. (I wonder if anyone understands that...) ^^
    You mean like getting the emotions from the poem and feeling them yourself, right? It can be done quite easily with some nice word usage and carefully though out imagery.

  8. #8
    SOS Brigade Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita has a reputation beyond repute Infinita's Avatar
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    I guess it just depends on the person I guess. I am very picky when it comes to poems and sometimes, even if it's written well, it can just be a bunch of words. But I have yet to see any poems that I dislike on here. ^^



    Every great work of art has two faces, one toward its own time and one toward the future, toward eternity.
    Daniel Barenboim

    Here is my family!:
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    Teddy2116:Cool big bro!
    Hikaru_Hitachiin: Cool older Brother!
    kirei-chan: Awesomo big sister!
    Serpentarius: Brother in law!

  9. #9
    Manic Shot WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream has a reputation beyond repute WinterDream's Avatar
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    Thanks for the nice replies.

    SigmaSD:I'll surely write more,once something comes into my mind.

    angel_alchemist9:Thanks to you.


    I actually always try to put my whole feelings into something I write.
    You call it madness, but I call it love.(Byas)


  10. #10
    Senior Member Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion has a reputation beyond repute Megamind's Minion's Avatar
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    you deserve the nice replies...
    LOL...
    your poem...
    it made me wish to live in a place where snow falls & not just my imagination...


    ~Howl's Mistress Evil Twin from the Other Side here to save her from further humiliation...

    avenge me!..
    kill kill kill

    sig by .Elmer

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