Naruto Fanfiction: Chapter 1

**UnlovedGirl** · 06-28-2007 06:52 AM

Please Enjoy^^

Chapter One

The day Sasuke returned
He gasped. The layout in front of him, the scene he saw … it just took his breath away. Konoha … it was in ruins now. Some buildings were still on fire. Bodies were everywhere. Blood splattered the walkway. Even the mountain of Hokages looked seriously beaten up. It was falling apart.
He was falling apart.
Sasuke slowly walked around, struggling to stand. His knees were shaking, though it didn’t seem like it.
He finally decided to go back to Konoha, and the day he did … he saw what was expected, but beyond imaginable.
There was a war. Orochimaru’s men against the people of the leaf village. Where was Sasuke that time? What was he doing?
An overwhelming sense of regret overcame his body. Was this all his fault?
The last Uchiha … was also the last Leaf Villager. That’s what it would seem.
Sasuke walked to the bench where he painfully left his old teammate. Sakura. Then it hit him. What happened to her? In the blink of an eye, he ran to where she might’ve gone to. To the places where she usually goes, or to the places where she would go at a time, such as a war. His heart raced. There might be a chance that she survived. Yes. There might. There has to be …
A girl in red lay on the floor, in front of the school Sasuke used to go to as a child. Her hair as pink as the cherry blossoms in the spring. Sakura laid still. Her eyes cold. Blood was trickling down the side of her mouth. “Sakura…no…” said Sasuke as he knelt beside her. He slowly sat her up and rested her head on his shoulder. Then he heard it. Her heart. It was barely beating, but it was enough proof that she was still alive. Barely.
Her breath was slow and light. It was faint. Sasuke knew Sakura wasn’t dead. She was on the edge of death, though. His heart skipped a beat.
“Sasuke…kun…” said the dying girl with a tired voice. The boy would have never thought that he’d be so happy to hear this girl's annoying cherry sweet voice. He looked at her. Her emerald green eyes were clouded, and started to tear. She smiled weakly.
“You’re back.” Tears trickled down her bruised cheeks. “I waited … so long.” She took a breath. “I knew you’d come back … sooner or later…” She started to breathe heavily. Sasuke wiped the blood off the side of her mouth, and the tears that sprang from her eyes.
“I’m sorry …” he said. His voice clearly filled with regret. He did not cry, but his heart did. It ached so badly, he gritted his teeth.
“Sasuke-kun …” more tears came to Sakura’s eyes. “Go find … Naruto …” Her voice cracked at saying Naruto’s name. Sasuke’s eyes widened. Naruto. He had to find him. Surely he wasn’t dead either. Surely he’d be in better shape then Sakura. Sasuke felt a hint of hope. The hope faded when he heard Sakura start panting.
“Sasuke-kun…” her voice cracked again. “…I Love you…don’t ever forget that.” She took a deep breath. “Sakura…” Sasuke said as he felt the girl’s body get colder. Her eyes went completely clouded. Her head dropped to one side. Her heart stopped beating…completely. Sakura Haruno was dead.
“Sakura!” Sasuke screamed. He held her against him once more. He didn’t love her as she loved him, but she was still a person in his life. She was his sister-figure. He came to a conclusion. Whether he loved her as more then a friend or not, he still loved her. In her ear, he softly whispered. “I love you, too, Sakura… Rest in peace.” He would give her a proper burial, but not now. There was no time. Naruto might be dying this very minute. Or worse, he could already be dead. Sasuke didn’t want that.
He laid Sakura on her back, and placed her hands on her chest. “I won’t be a burden to you anymore.” He said as he moved her hair off her forehead. The boy always knew that Sakura worried about him constantly. He just never took notice.

To Be Continued....

**Hitsugaya389** · 07-04-2007 01:24 AM

interesting.... only sasuke wouldn't fall for sakura

**Saiyan Destroyer** · 07-04-2007 10:34 PM

You speak too casually when describing. It's a little hard to read. YOU NEVER want to say "Said" it really hurts the feeling to whats going on. You want to make new paragraphs for people talking. You can include actions as well as conversation. It depends on how long of an action. If it breaks four sentences. You should consider putting it in a differenct paragraph. It's also a good idea to Double Space at the end of a statement or paragraph. Running it that close togher makes it look sloppy and difficult to read.

You bend Sasuke's character a little. Not that much. I doubt he'd say 'I love you' I think he'dd probably say along the lines of "Out of all the bothersome people I know, you bother me the least."