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Rainbow
"Rainbow in a Bottle"
Don't turn your back on me
because I redefine
everything you know.
I'm absolutely lovely,
off-color, I might be,
But magical, oh-so brilliant.
And so I am forever.
Comments very much appreciated. Not just "I like it!" but tell me specifically what parts you liked or disliked. I'm open to critism.
Last edited by Ami~chan; 07-10-2006 at 02:35 AM.
A have no idea what it means but it has a certain uneasy flow towards it... In a good way xD The only thing wrong that i can see (in my taste) is that the line "I'm absolutely love" seems to be out of place. Keep on writing. xD
EDIT: Oh okay, Now i understand the line lol XD
Last edited by .mystic; 07-10-2006 at 02:39 AM.
dead.
Whoops. Minor typos there. The line is supposed to be "I'm absolutely lovey."Originally Posted by Mystic_revolution
I'll fix it quickly.
Keep the comments coming!
well i kinda get it i liked though especaily 'But magical, oh-so brilliant" was really nice. i like ur poem its kinda condraticting a bet i like that. keep posting ^^
*lost in the world of broken and dead hearts,
traped in the mist of ones who lied,
confused by how foolish i am ,
wanting to disappear in my world alone with ones who care for me,
is that forbidden to ask that-tell me someone*
sig by Nespa thank u so much ur awsome !!! lol ^.^
the famous Crimson Soul the best stalker ever
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