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Thread: resonance Soul Eater alternative lyrics(?)

  1. #1
    Junior Member mihai1rus is on a distinguished road mihai1rus's Avatar
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    Default resonance Soul Eater alternative lyrics(?)

    I'm not sure if this is where i can suggest alternative translations, but I came up with a slightly different translation for "resonance" from Soul Eater. I'll post it, and then point out the places of most significance. Also, the HTML: https://www.animelyrics.com/anime/so.../resonance.htm

    If the beaconing of cinched souls
    points at your chest,
    are you now capable of hearing
    the stronger-than-words echoes?

    Getting involved with destiny,
    not meeting eyes is sufficient;
    darting through the all-encompassing night,
    our destinations overlap.

    The glaring of whose whereabouts we've searched for far too long
    lingers even in bad dreams.

    If the beaconing of cinched souls
    points at your chest
    are you now capable of hearing
    the stronger-than-words echoes?

    The means by which we met are of no matter
    for we resonate,
    and only the wound-fragments of the instant we touched
    can become unclouded.

    Lies and camouflage are still;
    upon the writhing world we shine
    and the outmost rapture seeming as if we shattered it together
    wants to observe.

    The hands with which I grab hold of my wail not to be left alone
    are far too distant from grace.

    We can wish for everything,
    for tomorrow is no more.
    Shan't we believe
    in the ties which are slightly better than yesterday?

    The means by which we met are of no matter
    for we resonate,
    and only the wound-fragments of the instant we touched
    can become unclouded.



    Roku ni me mo awasazu
    unmei ni made karandeku

    Rather than
    "I'm not watching the necessary,
    I'm even getting entwined with destiny"

    I figured

    "Getting involved with destiny,
    not meeting eyes is sufficient;"

    Deatta wake wa dou datte ii
    From
    What do you think of the excuse for meeting each other by chance?
    to
    The means by which we met are of no matter

    Uso mo gisou mo aru
    yoreta sekai wo teri tsukete
    Moroto mo bukkowaresona
    muchuu no hate ga mitai

    Rather than:

    "There are lies and disguises
    Kicking the twisted world
    Together with you,
    I want to see the end of this likely to break trance"

    I think it would suit the song better:

    Lies and camouflage are still;
    upon the writhing world we shine
    and the outmost rapture seeming as if we shattered it together
    wants to observe.

    I can go into detail as to why I think each of these changes is preferable, but this post is long enough as it is.

    I am kind of a newbie, so the last thing I want to do is seem arrogant or whatever, but I just love translating stuff and figured I might give it a shot. Maybe I should actually translate a song myself before correcting something on here, but I don't know...
    Last edited by mihai1rus; 03-30-2018 at 03:32 AM.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: resonance Soul Eater alternative lyrics(?)

    A lot of posts get caught by the spam filter; please do still post a link to the song you're trying to correct in the first post and don't double-post. I'll come along and approve moderated posts eventually.

    I do think you're correct that there are places where the translation on the site could be improved. However, your own understanding of the grammar here is imperfect, resulting in a translation that is simply inaccurate in a different way rather than being more accurate. In addition, to submit a full new translation to lyrics that are on the site, you would have to take and pass the Level 2 Japanese test (https://www.animelyrics.com/index.php?action=jptest), which we require of all of our translation contributors.

  3. #3
    Junior Member mihai1rus is on a distinguished road mihai1rus's Avatar
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    Default Re: resonance Soul Eater alternative lyrics(?)

    I understand. Well, thank you very much for letting me know about this. I guess that when you learn Japanese by yourself, noticing mistakes you make becomes a bit more troublesome. Also, I'm sorry for my lack of knowledge ragarding both the site's policies, as well as, well, translations in general.

    I'll take a shot at the test soon. Again, thank you heaps!
    Last edited by mihai1rus; 03-30-2018 at 11:21 PM.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: resonance Soul Eater alternative lyrics(?)

    That's okay--everyone is new at some point, both to the site and to translation. And I appreciate you bringing this song to my attention as needing some work, regardless.

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