I'd like my translation to be reviewed and I need some help with a few trouble spots.
First the raw lyrics:
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My translation:
WAKE UP, training will start. Prepare your resolve.
WAKE UP, rise and shine. From here on it's gonna be hell.
STRETCH, your body is stiff- oh so stiff. (aah, it hurts)
STRETCH, more flexible, until your chin touches! (aah it hurts)
Fat-burning aerobic exercise
We won't allow you to say you're tired. Before you tire, RUNNER'S HIGH.
Not a weapon! Not a weapon!
Sexiness is not a weapon to seduce men!
Not a weapon! Not a weapon!
A voluptuous body isn't a weapon tickling at secret motives!
MAKE UP, Makeup is fundamental. Prepare your resolve.
MAKE UP, who is the you reflected in the mirror? (Who is she? Unsophisticated!)
The dirt of dead skin cells hinders your skin's health (woah)
Moisturizer, beauty cream, facial lotion when you wake up for an alluring complexion
The whole shebang! The whole shebang!
The total package of advancing on beauty road
The whole shebang! The whole shebang!
The only toll for commuting to Aesthetic
The whole shebang!
"Aren't we sexy yet?"
"Completely worthless! Sex appeal isn't that weak!"
"It's impossible! This is the limit!"
((I'm having trouble with the grammar on this line. アタイら海女ゾネス とことんヤるまでさ
見せつけろ!恥じらうんじゃねェェエ! -> Something like, "We Amazons do until the bitter end. I'll show you! It's nothing to blush about!" ? ))
"It's the whole shebang!"
Only take his seed, men are at rest on their laurels (a sheltered upbringing)
Wild instinct awakens, my Amazon ache
(it's the whole shebang ♥)
Not a weapon! Not a weapon!
Sexiness is not a weapon to seduce men!
The whole shebang! The whole shebang!
The total package of advancing on beauty road
We won't forgive! We won't forgive!
We aint gonna forgive any of you curs!
Amazoness! Amazoness!
((MELTY 熱く融け出す HOT BODY --> "MELTY the HOT BODY that melts it out with heat!" ? Or something? ))
(Let's go girls! Everyone line up!)
((女の女による女だけの女だらけの海女ゾネス 海女ゾネス!--> "Amazons of women, according to women, only women, women everywhere" ? ))
Amazoness!
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Thanks in advance for any input, especially on those spots i'm having trouble.
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