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Thread: Kagamine Rin & Len - Sennou

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    Default Kagamine Rin & Len - Sennou

    人に生まれ 人になるため
    明日と言う名の カバン背負って
    有り触れた 未来を詰めた
    配給の列は 大渋滞だ

    hito ni umare hito ni naru tame
    asu to iu na no KABAN seotte
    arifureta mirai o tsumeta
    haikyuu no retsu wa daijuutai

    To be born human and become human
    We must shoulder a pack called "tomorrow"
    Stuffed with an ordinary future
    The queue for rations isn't moving at all

    ただ望まれる事も
    ただ選ばれる事も
    この腕では 支え切れず
    命は張り裂けた

    tada nozomareru koto mo
    tada erabareru koto mo
    kono ude de wa sasaekirezu
    inochi wa harisaketa

    The things that people want from me
    And the things that they've chosen for me [1]
    Are too heavy for my arms to hold
    My life has been torn apart

    死にたがる動機はどうせ無いけれど
    生きてみる道理もなくて
    これからもそれはきっと揺るがない
    ならば今を生きている
    僕等何に縋ればいい

    shinitagaru douki wa douse nai keredo
    ikite miru douri mo nakute
    kore kara mo sore wa kitto yuruganai
    naraba ima o ikite iru
    bokura nani ni sugareba ii

    I don't really have any incentive to die, but
    I don't have a reason to try to live, either
    I'm sure that won't change even from now on
    In that case, if we're living this moment,
    What should we cling to?

    人に生まれ 人になれずに
    列は今では 墓場のようだ
    残された 未来の腐臭も
    酸鼻を極め 明日ごと燃やした

    hito ni umare hito ni narezu ni
    retsu wa ima de wa hakaba no you da
    nokosareta mirai no fushuu mo
    sanbi o kiwame asu goto moyashita

    The queue is now like a graveyard
    Of those who were born human but couldn't become human
    The putrid smell left by the future
    Was horrific and burned down along with tomorrow [2]

    ただ許される事が
    まだ信じられなくて
    笑い者に されるならと
    命に鍵掛けた

    tada yurusareru koto ga
    mada shinjirarenakute
    waraimono ni sareru nara to
    inochi ni kagi kaketa

    I still can't believe [3]
    That I would be forgiven
    Thinking, "If I'm going to be made a laughingstock..."
    I've locked away my life

    愛される事だけが全てだと
    その教鞭を執るのなら
    その教科書だとか図鑑とやらは
    この胸にぽっかり開いた
    穴をどう説いているんですか

    aisareru koto dake ga subete da to
    sono kyouben o toru no nara
    sono kyoukasho da to ka zukan to yara wa
    kono mune ni pokkari hiraita
    ana o dou toite iru n'desu ka

    If you're going to take up the pointer to teach
    That "being loved is everything"
    How can your textbooks and picture dictionaries and such
    Explain the gaping hole
    That has opened in my heart? [4]

    頬を伝った 涙の跡を
    追い掛けて 行き着いた先で
    捨てられたまま 痩せこけていた
    夢たちが凍えていた

    hoo o tsutatta namida no ato o
    oikakete ikitsuita saki de
    suterareta mama yasekokete ita
    yume-tachi ga kogoete ita

    If you follow the tracks of tears on my cheeks
    At the end of them,
    Abandoned and starved,
    My dreams have frozen

    時だけが残酷に過ぎて往けど
    変わらない胸裏の傷愴と
    変われない置いてけぼりの僕等を
    過去たちが嘲笑っている

    toki dake ga zankoku ni sugite yukedo
    kawaranai kyouri no shousou to
    kawarenai oite kebori no bokura o
    kako-tachi ga azawaratte iru

    Time cruelly goes on passing, but
    The pasts are mocking
    The unchanging wounds of our hearts
    And our unchangeable, left-behind selves

    剥き出しの心は言葉と呼ぶ
    雨霰に曝されて
    息も絶え絶えになったこの脈を
    どうかそっと暖めてくれ
    その両手で暖めてくれ

    mukidashi no kokoro wa kotoba to yobu
    amearare ni saresasete
    iki mo taedae ni natta kono myaku o
    douka sotto atatamete kure
    sono ryoute de atatamete kure

    Our naked hearts are called words
    Exposed to the driving rain
    My breath and my pulse have become faint
    Please, softly, warm them up
    Warm them up with both of your hands

    [1] I know verb + 事 is usually nominalizing the verb and if it were "the things that were wished for" etc. it would probably be 物 or something instead, but translating these lines as "having been wished for and having been chosen" doesn't quite... make sense to me? So I went with an interpretation that seemed slightly more logical meaning-wise if less so grammatically, but if I'm missing something here, please do explain it to me.

    [2] 酸鼻を極め explanation: https://kotobank.jp/word/%E9%85%B8%E...3%82%8B-278368. I am deeply unsure about the grammar of these last two lines. Is 残された未来の腐臭 the subject? It doesn't seem quite right, but then who/what is, and what is 残された未来の腐臭's relation to the rest of the phrase?

    [3] Okay to take this out of passive voice, do you think? I appreciate the purpose that the passive construction is serving in this & the previous similar stanza, but I think it sounds much weirder in English.

    [4] Not entirely sure my understanding of the grammar here is correct, especially when it comes to "その教科書だとか図鑑とやらは".
    Last edited by bluepenguin; 07-13-2017 at 11:31 AM.

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    Default Re: Kagamine Rin & Len - Sennou

    You might wish to compare damesukekun's translation.

    有り触れた未来 I would agree with damesukekun, "ordinary future". "Trite" refers to something that's repeated so often that it has lost it's freshness and effectiveness, which I would not think is applicable to "future".

    [1] I think it refers to what is wished from the narrator, and either that the narrator has been chosen for something or what is being chosen for them. I'm think 事 can refer to both the act of doing something as well as to an intangible thing, so, either the fact of being chosen, or the act/role/etc. one has been chosen for.

    命は張り裂けた damesukekun has "my life is torn apart" which sounds like more natural english to me.

    [2] 残された 未来の腐臭も could mean either "the stench of what's left of the future", or "the stench that's left by the future". The space before mirai might suggest to me that nokosareta refers to the stench rather than to the future, but obviously pick what makes best sense to you.

    明日ごと燃やした It makes sense to me if this is referring to what happens to the smell: "The stench that's left by the future is horrific and is burned up along with tomorrow itself." damesukekun seems to have a similar translation.

    [3] I would take 信じられなくて as potential rather than passive: "I still can't believe that I would be forgiven". If it were passive, then probably it would mean something like "They still don't believe me that I/we/they would be forgiven".

    [4] Not really sure myself either, but EDICT has for やら: "such things as A and B; A and B and the like". damesukekun translates, "How can such things as textbooks and picture dictionaries / Explain the hole / In my heart?" which seems to fit the Japanese.

    Hope this helps.

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    Default Re: Kagamine Rin & Len - Sennou

    Sorry it took me so long to get back to you! I saw you had replied and was like "oh, cool, I'll have to get to that later," and then I got distracted and a week+ went by. But I do appreciate the feedback nonetheless!

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    有り触れた未来 I would agree with damesukekun, "ordinary future". "Trite" refers to something that's repeated so often that it has lost it's freshness and effectiveness, which I would not think is applicable to "future".
    Yeah, fair enough.

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    [1] I think it refers to what is wished from the narrator, and either that the narrator has been chosen for something or what is being chosen for them. I'm think 事 can refer to both the act of doing something as well as to an intangible thing, so, either the fact of being chosen, or the act/role/etc. one has been chosen for.
    Makes sense, thanks.

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    命は張り裂けた damesukekun has "my life is torn apart" which sounds like more natural english to me.
    I didn't like the wording of that line but couldn't think how else to phrase it, so of course there was a common English phrase that could've been used that I just completely forgot about for some reason. Good job, me!

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    [2] 残された 未来の腐臭も could mean either "the stench of what's left of the future", or "the stench that's left by the future". The space before mirai might suggest to me that nokosareta refers to the stench rather than to the future, but obviously pick what makes best sense to you.
    I always have such a hard time with adjectives (or verbs operating adjectivally) that could be modifying an entire noun phrase or just one noun in it, but I think you're right about the space implying that 残された isn't modifying 未来 itself here.

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    明日ごと燃やした It makes sense to me if this is referring to what happens to the smell: "The stench that's left by the future is horrific and is burned up along with tomorrow itself." damesukekun seems to have a similar translation.
    Ahh, yes, that would make sense.

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    [3] I would take 信じられなくて as potential rather than passive: "I still can't believe that I would be forgiven". If it were passive, then probably it would mean something like "They still don't believe me that I/we/they would be forgiven".
    So I was on the right track for the wrong reasons, I guess. :P

    Quote Originally Posted by Raichu View Post
    [4] Not really sure myself either, but EDICT has for やら: "such things as A and B; A and B and the like". damesukekun translates, "How can such things as textbooks and picture dictionaries / Explain the hole / In my heart?" which seems to fit the Japanese.
    That also makes much more sense.

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