Air - Tori no Uta (Bird's Poem) WIP need help

[HKO2006]

http://www.anim`elyrics.com/game/air/torinoshi.jis
First, the song name should be "Bird's Poem", 詩 means poem, song is 歌 in Japanese.
Chinese lyrics from the vidio and www.keyfc.net/bbs/showtopic-30478.aspx
Might help if you know Chinese.
I don't know Japanese but I know Chinese so I know the meaning of the 漢字 in Japanese. I use 3 machine translate and a JP dictionary, baidu gave me some good translation as people contribute when using it.
http://translate.google.com/
http://fanyi.baidu.com/
http://www.bing.com/translator
http://dictionary.goo.ne.jp/

I only list lines needed to be revised, full srt with time stamp attached below.
? means the original translation
` means the revised one
/ and OR means two explaintions
() means words inside maybe can be omitted
* means lines need help

*2
眩しくて逃げた　いつだって弱くて
mabushikute nigeta itsudatte yowakute

?They were so dazzling, I ran away- I was always weak

My understanding
眩しくて dazzling, 逃げた escaped, いつ even, だって because, 弱く weak, て the
いつだって I always
`
?因耀眼而避開了　不知何時(有)的脆弱
At the end, dont know what the line is talking about, Need help

3
あの日から変わらず
ano hi kara kawarazu

?I let go, frustrated by the fact

`Unchanged since that day

`從那一天起未曾改變
日 is day, 変 is change
Even it is for transliteration sake, it can be done better

4
いつまでも変わらずにいられなかったこと
itsumademo kawarazu ni irarenakatta koto

?That I couldn't stay unchanged since that day

For transliteration sake again.

`(There is)No such thing as (forever) not changing (forever)

?但絕不會有永恆不變這一回事/永恆不變的事不可以存在
I belive. Not sure whether the forever should be before or after not changing.

5
悔しくて指を離す
kuyashikute yubi wo hanasu

?Couldn't stay unchanged forever

While 悔 literally means regret, 悔しくて is frustration in google trans

`Frustrated but have to let go

?所以我後悔地放手了
`雖然無奈　但還是放手了

*7
いつかは風を切って知る
itsuka wa kaze wo kitte shiru

?But someday she will know the feeling of cutting through the wind

`Eventually (it) will know how to fly (through/against//with/by) wind

?但(它)總能察覺風何時(才能)掠過
`終有一天能夠(乘/逆)風飛翔
not sure は風を切って means fly against the wind or not, seems is "against" to me because 切 means cut. Need help

8
届かない場所がまだ遠くにある
todokanai basho ga mada tooku ni aru

?The place she can't reach is still there in the distance

`The place (she/I) can't reach is still far away

`到不了的彼方是遙遠
The she/I seems can be omitted to me, not native English.

*9
願いだけ秘めて見つめてる
negai dake himete mitsumeteru

?She gazes at it, keeping her wish to herself

`The(My) only wish is to secretly gaze at you

?只希望你能偷偷看著就好/只能將願望深藏
`只希望能悄悄地凝望着你
願い wish, だけ only, 秘め secertly/hidden, て見つめ gaze, てる you
Seems make a lot more scene to me. Not too sure though.

11
吹く風に素足をさらして
fuku kaze ni suashi wo sarashite

?Exposing their bare feet to the blowing wind

Not sure if they are intenionally Exposing their bare feet OR it is merely describing wind blow (through?) their feet

`Exposing bare feet to the blowing wind OR Wind blow (throught) to (their) explosed bare feet(s)

`流風輕撫著(他們的)赤腳

12
遠くには幼かった日々を
tooku ni wa osanakatta hibi wo

?We place in the distance the days of our childhood

`Childhood fade away day by day

?送走了遙遠的孩童時光/兒時的點點滴滴漸漸遠去
`

13
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:53,800
両手には飛び立つ希望を
ryoute ni wa tobidatsu kibou wo
?We place in our hands hope that springs forth
`(Like) hope fly away form our hands
?兩手懷抱的希望也隨風而去/而將要實現的夢　就在手裹
`(就如)從雙手中飛走的希望


14
00:01:53,800 --> 00:02:01,000
消える飛行機雲　追いかけて追いかけて
kieru hikoukigumo oikakete oikakete
`Chasing, chasing the fading vapor trails
`漸漸消失的飛行航跡 我們追了又追/不停追著　消失的飛機航跡

15
00:02:01,500 --> 00:02:11,000
この丘を越えたあの日から変わらずいつまでも
kono oka wo koeta ano hi kara kawarazu itsumademo
?It hasn't changed since the day (we/I) crossed that hill, and never will
`(I) Never changed since the day flew over the hill OR Since the day I flew over the hill, (I) never changed
`從越過這山丘的那一日後就始終不變

16
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:17,500
真っ直ぐに僕たちはあるように
massugu ni bokutachi wa aru youni
?So that we will always have it,
`Just like us (refering we never changed)
?簡直就像是我們般依然不變/就如依然如故的我們一樣/一般

17
00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:32,000
海神のような強さを守れるよ　きっと
watatsumi no youna tsuyosa wo mamoreru yo kitto
?We'll guard the strength of a sea god, surely
(I'm sure/surely) (keep) (justlike) (stregth of the sea-god) (I'll)
`(I) will surely keep/protect it with/just like/of the stregth of the sea-god OR (I) will surely keep/protect the stregth of the sea-god
(redering to protect themselves from changing)
?一定能堅守(著)像海神般(的)堅強
`以像海神般的力量守護著 OR 守護著像海神般的力量

18
00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:54,600
あの空を回る風車の羽根たちは
ano sora wo mawaru fuusha no hanetachi wa
`The blades of the windmill turn(ing)/spin(ing) in the sky/air
`在空中迴轉的風車旋翼

19
00:02:54,600 --> 00:03:00,500
いつまでも同じ夢見る
itsumademo onaji yume miru
`Always have the same dream
?永遠都在追尋同樣的夢
`永遠/一直做著同樣的夢

20
00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:10,200
届かない場所をずっと見つめてる
todokanai basho wo zutto mitsumeteru
?The dream of a bird, her wish kept to herself,
`(I'm) Staring at the place (I) can't reach
`一直凝視著到達不了遙遠的地方

21
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:17,000
願いを秘めた鳥の夢を
negai wo himeta tori no yume wo
?Gazing at the place she can't reach
`The hidden wish of the bird OR The bird hid the wish OR Relay the bird's wish (to you)
?願你實現小鳥那深藏的夢/只能將小鳥的夢想藏在心
`

22
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:25,300
振り返る灼けた線路　覆う
furikaeru yaketa senro oou
?I look back: the sun-baked railway tracks are hidden
`Look back the railway heated by the sun, coverd/hidden
`回頭看/回顧那灼熱的鐵軌

23
00:03:25,300 --> 00:03:33,300
入道雲　形を変えても
nyuudougumo katachi wo kaetemo
?By stormclouds- even if they change their shape,
`
?即使籠罩它的積(雨)雲改頭換面
`

24
00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:41,000
僕らは覚えていて　どうか
bokura wa oboete ite douka
?May we always remember
`May we always remember OR We will remember, please
`但希望我們仍然記得/我們依然能記得

25
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:48,000
季節が残した昨日を
kisetsu ga nokoshita kinou wo
?The yesterdays left behind by the seasons...
?季節所殘留的昨日

26
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:55,700
消える飛行機雲　追いかけて追いかけて
kieru hikoukigumo oikakete oikakete
`Chasing, chasing the fading vapor trails
`漸漸消失的飛行航跡 我們追了又追/不停追著　消失的飛機航跡

27
00:03:55,700 --> 00:04:04,900
早すぎる合図　ふたり笑い出してるいつまでも
hayasugiru aizu futari waraidashiteru itsumademo
`The signal is given too early- we start laughing
`總是為了太早打出的暗號而彼此大笑/太早打的暗號使兩人相視而笑

28
00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:11,500
真っ直ぐに眼差しはあるように
massugu ni manazashi wa aru youni
?So that we can always look straight ahead,
`
?就像愣直的眼神般
`

29
汗が滲んでも手を離さないよ　ずっと
ase ga nijindemo te wo hanasanai yo zutto
`Even if it's slippery with sweat, I won't let go of your hand, ever
`就算汗浸濕了手也不鬆開　一直緊握著/一直緊握著　就算汗浸濕了也不鬆開的手

30
消える飛行機雲　僕たちは見送った

31
眩しくて逃げた　いつだって弱くて

32
あの日から変わらず

33
いつまでも変わらずにいられなかったこと

34
悔しくて指を離す

Further reading
http://plaza.rakuten.co.jp/soraandpoteto/3001/
http://blogs.yahoo.co.jp/tmdu060241ms/2297503.html

Full song with 4 dialect English Lyrics w/Romaji 中字 漢字


Attachment with time stamp.

[AzureDark]

I don't know Japanese

then you can't make corrections here. Chinese has totally different grammar rules and just applying them to a translation of Japanese with only reading the kanji just doesn't do.

There is a long, protracted reason why in some corners of the world it is still called "Tori no Shi". I'd like to preserve it in the page name since I can put anything for it - even joke titles.