College Girls and their parenting strictness......

[mt774]

College Girls and their parenting strictness......

Do you feel that college girls will have parents who will feel disgraced if they have for partner a guy who has no job, no career????

I mean some college girls parents will be shamed that they want to be with a guy who has not much prospects right?? especially if they get pregnant, they will insist on abortion.

your thought?

[RyuTama]

I'm sure all parents want their children to grow up and have promising partners. I doubt there's a single mother or father who looks at their kid and says "Oh, I do hope they marry a homeless person one day". It just doesn't happen. I don't think they'd feel particularly ashamed per se if their daughter was in a relationship with a man that had no career, but it's only natural that they'd be a bit disgruntled or disappointed. A good job means a steady income, which means more financial security, which means a comfortable home to settle down and have kids, if the need ever arises. I don't really think it's a matter of dignity, but more like a concern for the son or daughter, and hopes that they'll live a comfortable life with the person they love.

For example, if my daughter were to be in a relationship with a man with no job, it wouldn't irk me at first, but I would certainly suggest that he look for one, if he already wasn't.

Of course, there are other important aspects that parents may consider before approving of their kids' partners. Like, are they respectful? Are they determined or ambitious? Are they lazy or insecure?

Financially-wise, as long as my daughter was with someone who showed genuine signs of wanting or looking for work, I wouldn't particularly mind.

[wolfgirl90]

College Girls and their parenting strictness......

Do you feel that college girls will have parents who will feel disgraced if they have for partner a guy who has no job, no career????

I mean some college girls parents will be shamed that they want to be with a guy who has not much prospects right?? especially if they get pregnant, they will insist on abortion.

your thought?

You are making a lot of assumptions here. You are assuming that girls are attending college at the whim of their parents (which isn't always true) or that the simple fact that they are IN college means that they have high expectations for themselves and others, including their potential mate (which also isn't always true).

I'm in college because I want to be and I honestly date whomever I want to; I don't tell my parents because its none of their business (I have a great relationship with them; its just stuff like this is none of their concern). I bet that there are parents who strict about who their daughters date, but this happens whether they go to college or not.

And even if the parents aren't strict, people have standards and some girls don't want to date a guy who doesn't have a job or doesn't have ambitions for one.

But then again, their are some college girls who honestly don't a damn who their partner is and will date anybody.

[Wio]

Hypergamy is ingrained in our culture and even our biology to an extent.

Society cringes at the idea of some girl having to support some deadbeat boyfriend, while the opposite is common and accepted. The only exception here is if the girlfriend gets utterly dependent on the boyfriend, in which case we accuse him of "economic abuse".

The parents of college girls are only strict when you make a comparison to the parents of college boys. They have to worry about the status of their precious cupcakes' boyfriend in addition to all the red flags that the parents of a boy would worry about. A boys parents only have one concern that parents of girls don have: the security of paternity and thus the promiscuity of a girl (i.e. Is it just me Betsy, or do our grandchildren bear no resemblance to our son?).

[mt774]

Not many i'm seeing of those college girls who are dating guys who are poor/unemployed etc..especially those white and Asian girls who go to college and university - they will usually only willing to date guys in high income job.

Many rappers before they were rich could only date those girls who will have kid with anyone due to being from low-economic the same.

[Meenah]

Not many i'm seeing of those college girls who are dating guys who are poor/unemployed etc..especially those white and Asian girls who go to college and university - they will usually only willing to date guys in high income job.

Many rappers before they were rich could only date those girls who will have kid with anyone due to being from low-economic the same.

Its none of your business if other people would do that. Last time I see it, its called a choice.
I go to college because I want to. I'm with someone because I love that person. I don't really care if my parents are strict for me it's none of their concern of who I am with. I don't let my relationship interfere with anything, and two I'm damn lucky that I have someone with a decent job who plans to be a doctor. Worry about yourself and what you want that's good.

[mt774]

Are you saying him wanting to be doctor is important factor for you being with him?

[Meenah]

Are you saying him wanting to be doctor is important factor for you being with him?

That had been his choice ever since I've met him. The factor of me being with him because I love him, I'm just damn lucky to have someone who wants to do good for himself.

[SuXrys]

College Girls and their parenting strictness......

Do you feel that college girls will have parents who will feel disgraced if they have for partner a guy who has no job, no career????

I mean some college girls parents will be shamed that they want to be with a guy who has not much prospects right?? especially if they get pregnant, they will insist on abortion.

your thought?

No I can't really say that I agree with you.

Im studying my fourth year at the University at the moment and are together with a guy that, as far as I know of it, my parents like. He doesn't have any higher education, or even a job, at the moment but my parents still likes him alot. He is searching for jobs and are thinking about start studying to the fall but... well.. I don't think my parents would think so more less about him even if he wouldn't done those things. Maybe a little annoyed, but so would I.

Just being "too lazy", not even wanting to job, is not a trait that either I or my family members find.. appealing.. But disgraceful? No. The most important thing, when it comes down to it, is not someones job or education it's their personality.


* When it comes to job / or educate yourself so you'll get a job, I think has more to do with the fact that parents want their children to live in stabil economic situtaion - and being able to pay for your bills are a big part of that.


When it comes to my un-educated and un-employed guy the only thing that my parents.... *cough cough my mother* ^w^ doesn't like is that they want him to cut his hair. But that is another story, hahah! x)

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And I have never, NEVER, threw my years at Univeristy [and it's after all my fouth year now] meet anyone, neither students or parents, who looks down or are ashamed of people who arn't having educations or jobs. I have never meet people like that, so I don't think it's common at all.

Worried that their their children will be able to pay for food / bills, sure, but ashamed? No, no no no. Never meet, or even heard of, people like that.

especially if they get pregnant, they will insist on abortion.

If you have a child that is very young and that has no money to be able to pay for having a child (a child costs money, not only love), it's not strange that parents would advise their children to wait a couple of years before getting pregnant.

Not many i'm seeing of those college girls who are dating guys who are poor/unemployed etc..especially those white and Asian girls who go to college and university - they will usually only willing to date guys in high income job.

Im white and comes from an high educated family... if that matters? o_O

[Arrisu]

I believe that education is important to maintain a stable and healthy relationship in this day and age. The number one cause for divorce is because of financial problems between couples in America. So yes, I don't see anything wrong with parents worrying whom their daughter is dating. As long as the man is working in a happy, stable environment, my own parents are happy. It's no good to date somebody who is jobless, doesn't have education and has no goals, since it'll only add stress to one's already hectic life. I personally think it's important not to be rich, but it's also important not to live poorly either. A harmonious balance is the healthiest lifestyle.