I was given a request to translate an English song into Japanese the other day. The song is titled "Within You" and is from a movie some of you may remember entitled "Labyrinth". Older than me as it has it! xD
Anyway, I tried doing it as best I could, but I don't think I'm conveying some parts poetically enough. Since this song is sung from the eyes of the Goblin King, I was perhaps wanting it to sound a little old yet powerful, but I wasn't sure how to do that. I was also tossing and turning as to whether "僕" or "俺" would be best to use. Anyway, please give me any suggestions and criticism because I would thrive off them. ^^
Within You
君の中で
How you've turned my world, you precious thing
You starve and near exhaust me
Everything I've done, I've done for you
I move the stars for no one
俺の世界をいかにも逆様にしてくれた 大切な人よ
俺を飢えさせて既の所で疲れ果てさせて
総ては君の為にした事なのだ
君の為であっても俺は星までは動かさない
You've run so long
You've run so far
Your eyes can be so cruel
Just as I can be so cruel
Though I do believe in you
Yes, I do
長い間駆けていた
とても遠くへ駆けていった
君の目は残酷に成りえる
俺も残酷に成りえるように
それでも俺はまだ君を信じているけど
そう、君を信じよう
Live without the sunlight
Love without your heartbeat
I can't live within you
日光なしで生きろ
君のハートビートなしで愛せ
俺は君の中で生きる事が出来ない
Also, another thing I was trying to do was write the beginning of one of my stories in Japanese (as originally intended). There are a few lines that are being tricky with me, but the one I'm thinking of at the moment is the opening line which goes "Mankind has come to a standstill".
I had two ideas for this:
1) 人類は立ち往生することになる。
2) 人類は停滞状態に墜ちいった。
Are either of these suitable enough to say that? =x
Bookmarks