Ertai87
04-15-2010, 06:10 PM
I just wrote the Japanese Translation test, but while I'm waiting for it to be graded I have some spare time, so I thought I'd try my hand at another translation. Unfortunately my last attempt crashed and burned, but I figured I'd try a somewhat easier song this time.
To the mods: If I end up failing the test, feel free to delete this thread. I don't think I failed, though...
First I'll post the Romaji currently on the site, then my translation of it. For the mods, to post to the site just copy and paste the blocks of English, ignoring the Romaji sections, to get my translation. Here goes:
------------------------------------
masshiro na keshiki ni ima sasowarete
boku wa yuku yo mada minu sekai e
I'm being invited by a pure-white scene.
I'm going to a yet-unseen world.
maigo no mama tabishiteta
nezumi iro no sora no shita
higawari no chizu ikutsu mo no yume ga nijin de ita
itsukahasa
chippoke na boku no kono hohaba demo
ano kumo no mukou made yukeru kana
tsuyogatte kizutsuita
kokoro sukashita you ni
furidashita ametsubu tachi ga
ranhanansha kurikaesu
When I was a lost child, I wandered
Under the gray sky
With a different map each day, so many dreams ran together,
I wondered if someday I would make it beyond that cloud
Even though I was only taking these small steps
The falling raindrops
Persisted an irregular reflection
As though seeing into my heart
Wounded for acting strong
massugu na hikari ga kousashite
yukusaki mo tsugenu mama
dokomademo tsukinukeru
awai zanzou ryou me ni yakitsukete
todoku hazu nanda mada minu sekai e
The rays of light crisscross
Going forever
without saying where they're headed.
My eyes are being burned by a fleeting afterimage
That's why I have to go to this yet-unforeseen world.
shirazu shirazu ni hatte ita no wa
shiro kuro no SUTEKKAA de
daiji na mono bokura wa kakushite shimatte ita
dakara mou chi yori hana yori hoshi no akari yori
kirei na yume to iu na no HOROGURAMU o zawameki o
The thing that I was unconsciously sticking
Was a black-and-white sticker
I ended up concealing my important things
That's why, more than the earth, more than the flowers, more than the light of the stars,
I'm humming a hologram called "a beautiful dream".
hamidashite sakaratte
itsuka egaita fuukei
kuyashi sa mo sabishi sa mo
ima awa mitai ni hajike tobu
Forced out and opposed
The scene which will sometime be painted
Chagrin and loneliness
Are now blown off like bubbles
massugu na michi de tsumazuitatte
kasabuta hagaretara
ima yori kitto tsuyoku nareru
masshiro na keshiki ni ima sasowarete
boku wa yuku yo mada minu sekai e
If I stumble on the straight road
And my scab tears off
I'll definitely become stronger than I currently am
I'm being invited by a pure-white scene
I'm going to a yet-unseen world.
kasumu sora no saki ni�@nijiiro no hikari
ashita no kage ni furueru tabi ni
tooku de boku o yobu koe ga shite
Whenever I tremble at the shadow of tomorrow
In front of the misty sky, a rainbow-colored light
Calls at me from far away
massugu na hikari ga chirabatte
ameagari no gogo ni
taba ni natte furisosogu
mugen no GURADEESHON ga ima mazari atte
kono sora no shita donna toko ni ite mo
kanarazu todoku hazu sa mada minu sekai e
The afternoon after a rainfall
The beams of light spread
Pouring out in bunches
The infinite gradations are mixing together
No matter where I am, under this sky
I'll surely arrive at that yet-unseen world.
--------------------------------------------
Well, that was my best shot. Hopefully I did better this time than last time. A couple problem spots that someone might want to look into:
-------------
1:
hamidashite sakaratte
itsuka egaita fuukei
This part was difficult to translate. I ended up just going for a line-by-line approach, but I don't think it makes much sense...
-----------------------------
2:
kasumu sora no saki ni�@nijiiro no hikari
ashita no kage ni furueru tabi ni
tooku de boku o yobu koe ga shite
I had trouble figuring out the subject of this sentence, so I kind of guessed at it. Also, someone should probably look into those control characters that are getting printed. I do have East Asian scripts installed on my computer, so I don't know what's going wrong there; it's copied directly from the lyrics page on animelyrics.com.
------------------------
3:
dakara mou chi yori hana yori hoshi no akari yori
kirei na yume to iu na no HOROGURAMU o zawameki o
I'm not quite sure where the quotation marks should begin and end. The translation is either:
That's why, more than the earth, more than the flowers, more than the light of the stars
I'm humming a hologram called "A beautiful dream"
or:
That's why I'm humming a hologram called "A dream more beautiful
than the earth, the flowers, and the light of the stars"
-------------------------
Anyway, I hope I didn't fail as badly this time as I did last time :D
Edit: Reading FUNimation's official translation for the TV-size and editing appropriately.
To the mods: If I end up failing the test, feel free to delete this thread. I don't think I failed, though...
First I'll post the Romaji currently on the site, then my translation of it. For the mods, to post to the site just copy and paste the blocks of English, ignoring the Romaji sections, to get my translation. Here goes:
------------------------------------
masshiro na keshiki ni ima sasowarete
boku wa yuku yo mada minu sekai e
I'm being invited by a pure-white scene.
I'm going to a yet-unseen world.
maigo no mama tabishiteta
nezumi iro no sora no shita
higawari no chizu ikutsu mo no yume ga nijin de ita
itsukahasa
chippoke na boku no kono hohaba demo
ano kumo no mukou made yukeru kana
tsuyogatte kizutsuita
kokoro sukashita you ni
furidashita ametsubu tachi ga
ranhanansha kurikaesu
When I was a lost child, I wandered
Under the gray sky
With a different map each day, so many dreams ran together,
I wondered if someday I would make it beyond that cloud
Even though I was only taking these small steps
The falling raindrops
Persisted an irregular reflection
As though seeing into my heart
Wounded for acting strong
massugu na hikari ga kousashite
yukusaki mo tsugenu mama
dokomademo tsukinukeru
awai zanzou ryou me ni yakitsukete
todoku hazu nanda mada minu sekai e
The rays of light crisscross
Going forever
without saying where they're headed.
My eyes are being burned by a fleeting afterimage
That's why I have to go to this yet-unforeseen world.
shirazu shirazu ni hatte ita no wa
shiro kuro no SUTEKKAA de
daiji na mono bokura wa kakushite shimatte ita
dakara mou chi yori hana yori hoshi no akari yori
kirei na yume to iu na no HOROGURAMU o zawameki o
The thing that I was unconsciously sticking
Was a black-and-white sticker
I ended up concealing my important things
That's why, more than the earth, more than the flowers, more than the light of the stars,
I'm humming a hologram called "a beautiful dream".
hamidashite sakaratte
itsuka egaita fuukei
kuyashi sa mo sabishi sa mo
ima awa mitai ni hajike tobu
Forced out and opposed
The scene which will sometime be painted
Chagrin and loneliness
Are now blown off like bubbles
massugu na michi de tsumazuitatte
kasabuta hagaretara
ima yori kitto tsuyoku nareru
masshiro na keshiki ni ima sasowarete
boku wa yuku yo mada minu sekai e
If I stumble on the straight road
And my scab tears off
I'll definitely become stronger than I currently am
I'm being invited by a pure-white scene
I'm going to a yet-unseen world.
kasumu sora no saki ni�@nijiiro no hikari
ashita no kage ni furueru tabi ni
tooku de boku o yobu koe ga shite
Whenever I tremble at the shadow of tomorrow
In front of the misty sky, a rainbow-colored light
Calls at me from far away
massugu na hikari ga chirabatte
ameagari no gogo ni
taba ni natte furisosogu
mugen no GURADEESHON ga ima mazari atte
kono sora no shita donna toko ni ite mo
kanarazu todoku hazu sa mada minu sekai e
The afternoon after a rainfall
The beams of light spread
Pouring out in bunches
The infinite gradations are mixing together
No matter where I am, under this sky
I'll surely arrive at that yet-unseen world.
--------------------------------------------
Well, that was my best shot. Hopefully I did better this time than last time. A couple problem spots that someone might want to look into:
-------------
1:
hamidashite sakaratte
itsuka egaita fuukei
This part was difficult to translate. I ended up just going for a line-by-line approach, but I don't think it makes much sense...
-----------------------------
2:
kasumu sora no saki ni�@nijiiro no hikari
ashita no kage ni furueru tabi ni
tooku de boku o yobu koe ga shite
I had trouble figuring out the subject of this sentence, so I kind of guessed at it. Also, someone should probably look into those control characters that are getting printed. I do have East Asian scripts installed on my computer, so I don't know what's going wrong there; it's copied directly from the lyrics page on animelyrics.com.
------------------------
3:
dakara mou chi yori hana yori hoshi no akari yori
kirei na yume to iu na no HOROGURAMU o zawameki o
I'm not quite sure where the quotation marks should begin and end. The translation is either:
That's why, more than the earth, more than the flowers, more than the light of the stars
I'm humming a hologram called "A beautiful dream"
or:
That's why I'm humming a hologram called "A dream more beautiful
than the earth, the flowers, and the light of the stars"
-------------------------
Anyway, I hope I didn't fail as badly this time as I did last time :D
Edit: Reading FUNimation's official translation for the TV-size and editing appropriately.