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princessofpep
01-24-2008, 05:23 PM
I guess I didn't finish this in time to not have to post a correction... aigu extra work ^^;


About 3 cm, could that be called soft? Ha!
A uniform wrapping is not to my disadvantage at all!
Go for it? Work for it?
In a time like that, Catch & release! Yo!
The sweat (Fuu) The sweat (Fuu) in my cleavage, Darlin' darlin' F R E E Z E!!
A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? cho! (1)
For rapping, a sailor uniform... it isn't a disadvantage, bu.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we catch and release, gyo
Darlin' darling FREEZE in the channel of my sweat, my sweat!!

The first line is about school uniform skirt regulations, so I translated is as so. The song is a rap, hence "rapping." In the third, the verbs are in a contraction of the しなくてはいけない form, so there has to be the meaning of "have to." The last line doesn't have anything to do with cleavage. Yes 谷間 can mean that, but I think it's quite a stretch here.


Something's feeling sluggish, something's going down
I love you, whoops, I messed up a bit
Worry-wart, bar set too high,
Mama's boy, Cut it out!
A bit tired— something's coming—
I love you— huh, just one letter's different (2)
You wimp— gymnastic high bar—
gourmet— enough already!

Cleaned up the first line, the second is not 間違えた so it does literally mean that one of the characters is different. They're referring to the rhyme on なんかデる and なんがダる. I translated the third line as wimp because I figure it's a lead in to the gymnastic high bar. 美味しんぼ does mean gourmet, I'm not sure where the mama's boy meaning came from. I can't find it in any JPN-JPN dictionaries.


That girl jumping over there, with the flushed body
Could she be called a normal girl?
Am I the only one surprised? Give me another helping of those Tonkotsu wires, dadada!
The blazing body of that gal who flew off—
she's what we call a normal girl?
Am I the only one who's surprised?
A second helping of that tender Tonkotsu (3)

I figure they're making a magical girl referrence here, so I think fly is appropriate. 針金 means wire, yes, but this is actually a pun using a dialectal form 張りがね which ends up meaning tender here.


BON-BON, cheering squad
Let's get! Cherry pie
RAN-RAN, welcome party
Look up! Sensation
Yes! Making an impression, dot dot... asteroids
Crashed, melted, dumbfounded
Break into song, sirenger
BON-BON cheer squad
Let’s get! Cherry pie
RAN-RAN welcome party
Look up! Sensation
Yea! Feels like something's there..
an asteroid bumped into me and crumbled away, whoa!
Sing out, squadron ranger

存在感 is the feeling that something is there, and the following phrase is all related. シレンジャ is just a sentai reference.


Bring it!
I'll definitely be the one with the last laugh
Because it's a sailor uniform. <- That's why.
Even though it's Monday!
I'm feeling down, what do I do?
Summer clothes feel nice. Oh? So! CUTE! V
Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion (4)
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v (5)

Um, 持っていく means "take," while 持ってくる means "bring." The connotation of はず is not that something is a for sure thing, but that it's supposed to be like that. The セーラー服だからです line is done in written style, so I think conclusion is more fitting. I switched the order of lines because the Monday thing sounds strange in English.


3 pieces approaching, that's a tough choice!
Go for it! So exciting! My Darlin' darlin' P L E A S E!! Gettin' close to 3 pics, don't know what to do until you see 'em yan☆ (6)
Do your best, be enthusiastic, my darlin' darlin' PLEASE!!

Oi, this one was a killer. The only meaning that I could find for ピクト is those little picture people like on bathroom doors and subway signs, so I translated it accordingly. The other possibility is a referrence to DS pictochats, but I doubt that since I can't find it abbriviated as just ピクト anywhere.


Rising, lowering
Loving, It's only right to keep it a secret!
Spoiled brat, bodyguard
Report card, get cocky and it's over!
Risin' up— fallin' down—
lovin' and such— still keep your morals secret—
Spoiled brat— bodyguard—
report card— get carried away and it'll be an honorable defeat

I added in たり, and cleaned up the longer phrases. 調子にこく is a dialect form of 調子に乗る which means "get carried away" etc. Edit: found the report card bit.


"Ouch, my pinky!" says the person I stepped on
An exaggerated glimpse of black knee highs
Is it absolute? Is it an area? My bare legs better be smooth, dadada! The guy I stepped on says "OW my pinky" all exaggeratedly
A glimpse of black knee highs
Ain't it certain? Ain't it our territory?
Beggin' for smooth, bare legs

Here the 大袈裟 is attached to the whiny guy. おねだり is begging.


MON-MON, a legend of delusion
Let's go! Parthenon
YAI-YAI Soran song
What's up? Temptation
Yes! The feeling of giving up, $$ (Ching ching) part time job
Search for it, find it
And you'll have no concerns with life at all! MON-MON Legend of the blind monk (7)
Let's go to the parthenon!
YAI-YAI Soran folk songs (8)
What's up? Temptation
Hey! Feels like I'm losing.. money money
If I look for a part time job I'll find one of course,
and then I'll have no worries in my life at all!

もうそう伝 is a Buddhist legend reference, and I cleaned up the ending phrase.


Try it!
I'll aim for something new this time!
Even if I change my sailor uniform = me!
What about weekends?
Things like teasing are commonplace!
Uniforms are easy = no problem! Try it!
What I'm aiming at now is my challenge
Even if I change out of my sailor uniform, it still = me
How 'bout the weekend?
Being admired like always
With a sailor uniform it's so simple = easy life

Yea, now != fresh, but "freshly aiming at" is some messed up English. チラ見せ isn't teasing, it's like ogling, admiring, or displaying stuff. Like on auctions or at stores they use it in ads to be like "LOOK AT our awesome stuff."


Wind speed 3 meters, I cling to you to make it through, gyuYour heart throbs, your stomach hurts, I'm Sugar Sugar S W E E T!! A wind speed of 3 meters— hold on and bear it gyu☆
My heart beatin' fast, you holdin' tight on my waist, I'm sugar sugar SWEET!!

Just cleaned up the subjects, etc.


BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
Hi! Education!! Love is ABC
*$#%[email protected]$#%* meow meow***
It's sunny, I'm in love, a disappointing love BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
HI! Education!! Love is ABC
undagadaa undagadaa unyuunya (9)
It gets sunny, I fall in love, but it never comes to fruition la—

That line is gibberish, but they're not swearing...


Bring it!
I'll definitely be the one with the last laugh
Because it's a sailor uniform. <- That's why.
Even though it's Monday!
I'm feeling down, what do I do?
Summer clothes feel nice. Oh? So! CUTE! V Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v

Same as above.


I know it!
I'll definitely be the one with the last laugh
Because it's a sailor uniform. <- That's whyyyyy. Of course
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion

やはり!= 知ってる



About 3 cm, could that be called soft? Woah!
A uniform wrapping is not to my disadvantage at all! po!
Go for it? <- Work for it?
At that time, cap and jersey, ha****
If my sweat, my sweat is transparent, darlin' darlin' A M U S E!! A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? whoa!
For rapping, a sailor uniform... right! it isn't a disadvantage, bo.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we wear our cap and jersey, ha
If you can see our sweat through 'em darlin' darling be AMUSED!!

The 抜けたら is about seeing the sweat through stuff -- sweat is always seethru by itself, yea?


------

Also, there are some pretty awkward typos in the romaji so I'll post that too, here are the complete lyrics then:

romaji:

aimai san-SENCHI sorya puni tte koto kai? cho!
RAPPINGU ga seifuku... daaa furi tte kotanai puu.
ganbaccha yacchacha
sonto KYAACCHI & Release gyo
ase (Fuu) ase (Fuu) no tanima ni Darlin' Darlin' FREEZE!!

nanka daru nanka deru
aishiteru are ikko ga chigatterunru
nayminbou koutetsubou
oishinbou ii kagen ni shinasai

tondetta aitsu no hoteru karada tte
iwayuru futsu no onya no ko
odoroita atashi dake? tonkotsu harigane okawari da-da-da

BON-BON ouendan
Let's get! CHERII PAI
RAN-RAN kangeikai
Look up! SENSEISHON
Hai! sonzaikan ten-ten shouwakusei
butsukatte tokemashita bouzen
ooi ni utatte SHIRENJAA

motte ike!
saigo ni waracchau no wa atashi no hazu
SEIRAA fuku da kara desu ←ketsuron
getsuyoubi na no ni!
kigen warui no dou suru yo?
natsu fuku ga ii no desu ←kyawaii

sekkin san-PIKUTO suru made tte chuucho da yan☆
ganbatte harikitte My Darilin' darlin' PLEASE!!

moriagari morisagari
koi shitari mada naisho ni shitoite rinri
amaenbou youjinbou
tsuushinbo choushi koite GYUKUSAI

fundetta aitsu ni koyubi itai tte
oogesa chiraari kuro NIIHAI
zettai jan ryouiki jan? namashi TSURUPIKA onedari da-da-da

MON-MON mousouten
Let's go! PARU shinden
YAI-YAI souranbushi
What's up? TENPUUTEISHON
oi! soushitsukan ten-ten ARUBAITO
sagashitara mitsukatte touzen
jinsei marutto kenen naashi

yatte mina!
shinki ni neracchau no wa atashi no chousen
SEIRAA fuku kikaete mo = atashi
shuumatsu wa dou yo?
chiramise nante arikitari!
seifuku wa kantanyo = rakuchin

fuusoku san-MEITORU dakitsuite gaman da gyu☆
mune dokkin koshi zukkin I'm Sugar sugar SWEET!!

BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
Hi! Education!! Love is ABC
undakadaa undakadaa unyuunya
harette horette hirenraa

motte ike!
saigo ni waracchau no wa atashi no hazu
SEIRAA fuku da kara desu ←ketsuron
getsuyoubi na no ni!
kigen warui no dou suru yo?
natsu fuku ga ii no desu ←kyawaii

yappari ne
saigo ni waracchau no wa atashi no hazu
SEIRAA fuku da kara desu ←ketsuron

aimai san-SENCHI sorya puni tte koto kai? wao!
RAPPINGU ga seifuku... yooshi furi tte kotanai bo.
ganbaccha yachaccha
anto KYAAPPU & JAASHI de ha
ase (Fuu) ase (Fuu) de suketara Darlin' darling AMUSE!!

Trans + notes:

A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? cho! (1)
For rapping, a sailor uniform... it isn't a disadvantage, bu.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we catch and release, gyo
Darlin' darling FREEZE in the channel of my sweat, my sweat!!

A bit tired— something's coming—
I love you— huh, just one letter's different (2)
You wimp— gymnastic high bar—
gourmet— enough already!

The blazing body of that gal who flew off—
she's what we call a normal girl?
Am I the only one who's surprised?
A second helping of that tender Tonkotsu (3)

(chatter: Where are my glasses? ...)

BON-BON cheer squad
Let’s get! Cherry pie
RAN-RAN welcome party
Look up! Sensation
Yea! Feels like something's there..
an asteroid bumped into me and crumbled away, whoa!
Sing out, squadron ranger

Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion (4)
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v (5)

Gettin' close to 3 pics, don't know what to do until you see 'em yan☆ (6)
Do your best, be enthusiastic, my darlin' darlin' PLEASE!!

Risin' up— fallin' down—
lovin' and such— still keep your morals secret—
Spoiled brat— bodyguard—
melancholic— get carried away and it'll be an honorable defeat

The guy I stepped on says "OW my pinky" all exaggeratedly
A glimpse of black knee highs
Ain't it certain? Ain't it our territory?
Beggin' for smooth, bare legs

MON-MON Legend of the blind monk (7)
Let's go to the parthenon!
YAI-YAI Soran folk songs (8)
What's up? Temptation
Hey! Feels like I'm losing.. money money
If I look for a part time job I'll find one of course,
and then I'll have no worries in my life at all!

Try it!
What I'm aiming at now is my challenge
Even if I change out of my sailor uniform, it still = me
How 'bout the weekend?
Showin' off like always
With a sailor uniform it's so simple = easy life

A wind speed of 3 meters— hold on and bear it gyu☆
My heart beatin' fast, you holdin' tight on my waist, I'm sugar sugar SWEET!!

(chatter: A new... Do you wanna skip class? It is okay if... Huh? ...)

BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
HI! Education!! Love is ABC
undagadaa undagadaa unyuunya (9)
It gets sunny, I fall in love, but it never comes to fruition la—

Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v

Of course
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion

A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? whoa!
For rapping, a sailor uniform... right! it isn't a disadvantage, bo.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we wear our cap and jersey, ha
If you can see our sweat through 'em darlin' darling be AMUSED!!

(1) What's being referred to here is the regulation on the length of school uniform skirts.

(2) ... between "nanka daru" and "nanka deru," in Japanese this whole verse rhymes.

(3) Tonkotsu is a kind of food. While "harigane/針金" literally means wire, here it's just word play—
in actuality it's being used as a negative, dialect varation form of the verb "haru/張る."

(4) "da kara desu" is written style, and then with "conclusion" marked like it is it gives this line the feel of a written assignment.

(5) The way "cute" is spelled here in Japanese makes a weird smiley: キャ?ワ!イイv

(6) This is referring to those little pictograph people you see on signs that tell you "no smoking" or "these seats are for the elderly" etc.

(7) This is a legend that originates from the Tendai sect of Buddhism about a blind monk who plays a Japanese lute from door to door.

(8) Souranbushi are traditional fishing songs from the Hokkaidou area.

(9) This is just gibberish like "oo dadada yayaya" would be.

Rizuchan
01-24-2008, 09:29 PM
There was a discussion thread not too long ago about this song, why didn't you post then before I submitted the translation? Anyway, guess I get to defend my translation. I knew I shouldn't have bothered with this song ><


A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? cho! (1)
For rapping, a sailor uniform... it isn't a disadvantage, bu.
"Puni" is a sound effect used when there's contact with something soft and squishy. It's used a lot in anime when a girl hugs a male, cue perverted responses. That's what I took of it.
"rappingu ga seifuku" seems pretty straightforward to me. "wrapping is a uniform", I don't see how 'rapping' could fit.


A bit tired— something's coming—
I love you— huh, just one letter's different (2)
You wimp— gymnastic high bar—
gourmet— enough already!
There's no reason to change the first two lines, my translation is fine as it is. I see where you get "gymnastic high bar", but since the rest seem to be a list of insults, I translated it as such. Gourmet was actually what I originally had, AzureDark suggested it be Mama's boy.


The blazing body of that gal who flew off—
she's what we call a normal girl?
Am I the only one who's surprised?
A second helping of that tender Tonkotsu
I didn't see it as a magical girl reference. It's a possibility but I think my translation is fine as it is. The tender part I'm not familiar with, but I'll take your word for it.


Yea! Feels like something's there..
an asteroid bumped into me and crumbled away, whoa!
Sing out, squadron ranger
存在感 is the feeling about another person's presence, not just 'something'. Making an impression seemed like a suitable translation.
溶けました is pretty much exclusive to melting/thawing, so I don't think the asteroid part should be translated as a sentence, rather a series of words. I have plenty of notes about the possibilites for てシレンジャー in my translation.


Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion (4)
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v (5)
Not to put the blame on him, but "Bring it" was another thing suggested to me by AzureDark.
はず as I've always understood it, has a more litteral meaning of "that's how it should be", but in cases like this should be used as "definitely" or "I know this is how it will be". I've always seen it used more like that. "That's the conclusion" is too literal. Here it's used more as "That's the final word" "That's it" "That's why".
The transposition of the monday and bad mood lines feels awkward to me. "Even though it's Monday, I'm already in a bad mood, what can I do?" something like that already sounds pretty natural in English.


Gettin' close to 3 pics, don't know what to do until you see 'em yan☆ (6)
Do your best, be enthusiastic, my darlin' darlin' PLEASE!!
I'm pretty sure it's pieces, in reference to the three pieces of a girl's school uniform, I could be wrong.


Risin' up— fallin' down—
lovin' and such— still keep your morals secret—
Spoiled brat— bodyguard—
report card— get carried away and it'll be an honorable defeat
Really, that's not that different than my translation. Rather than "keep your morals a secret' I believe it is "It's moral to keep it a secret" hence my translation "it's only right"


The guy I stepped on says "OW my pinky" all exaggeratedly
A glimpse of black knee highs
Ain't it certain? Ain't it our territory?
Beggin' for smooth, bare legs

The exaggerated one I accept, but the rest of those seem pretty nitpicky to me.


MON-MON Legend of the blind monk (7)
Let's go to the parthenon!
YAI-YAI Soran folk songs (8)
What's up? Temptation
Hey! Feels like I'm losing.. money money
If I look for a part time job I'll find one of course,
and then I'll have no worries in my life at all!
The blind monk thing would work fine as a side note, but I don't think the rest of it needs any correction.


Try it!
What I'm aiming at now is my challenge
Even if I change out of my sailor uniform, it still = me
How 'bout the weekend?
Being admired like always
With a sailor uniform it's so simple = easy life
Litterally it is "freshly aiming" so I thought "aiming for something new" however I'm thinking now "Aiming for a new challenge". I didn't translate 挑戦 because, as I've just now realized, the kanji I have says "はず" there by mistake. My fault for not noticing.
I wasn't familiar with "チラみせ", but I understand it as a sort of flirtatious teasing, which really isn't that different from "putting things up on display" if you understand the meaning I used. I woudn't object to 'teasing' being changed to 'showing it all off' or something of the like.


A wind speed of 3 meters— hold on and bear it gyu☆
My heart beatin' fast, you holdin' tight on my waist, I'm sugar sugar SWEET!!
Stomach/waist is the subject of that second whatever you call it. I'm pretty sure "ずっきん" refers to a clenching feeling in that area, whether from the nervousness or because she's "Sugar sugar S W E E T"


BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
HI! Education!! Love is ABC
undagadaa undagadaa unyuunya (9)
It gets sunny, I fall in love, but it never comes to fruition la—

That line is gibberish, but they're not swearing...

Who said a bunch of $%*&#*^ meant swearing? It's often used that way but it can be used for any sort of nonsense.


Of course
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion

The difference between "Of course" and "I know it!" sounds like artistic interpretation to me. I chose "I know it!" Because all of the previous lines have had an 'it' at the end and I thought it would sound more poetic to keep that kind of repetition.


A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? whoa!
For rapping, a sailor uniform... right! it isn't a disadvantage, bo.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we wear our cap and jersey, ha
If you can see our sweat through 'em darlin' darling be AMUSED!!
Once again, all of this is really po-tae-toe, po-tah-toe

princessofpep
01-24-2008, 10:10 PM
re: why didn't you post before?
Because I don't frequent anime forums.

re: po-tae-toe, po-tah-toe
Not really, your translation made it pretty clear you don't grasp how to infer the correct subject of an ambiguous sentence. (among other errors)

re: your rebuttals
You didn't really say much besides "that's not how I saw it" so I'm not going to bother, I already made my points.

AzureDark
01-25-2008, 12:55 AM
Gawd. What are you princesspep, some sort of Aki Hata crusader? I've wasted tons of my breath arguing about her work (yes I blame it on that genius) and I'm not going to do it all over again.

Rizuchan came earlier than you so the case is closed. It was hard enough to overwrite DM's trans, faulty as it was, but while God Knows was a clear cut, coherent (if even with Aki Hata-style ambiguous) piece of lyric-making this song could take millions of interpretations because of its nature.

Rizuchan if you agree with some of princesspep's points you can repost the revised thing here. You have the option to credit her for the revisions, but your name's still on the contrib.

princesspep I advise you to spend your energy somewhere else, some other lyricist's song other than Hata's. Her lyrics invoke wars, as we've all seen.

princessofpep
01-25-2008, 07:55 AM
I thought you guys wanted the most accurate lyrics? That's what is says on your site, but that's obviously not true judging by your policies. You just want the first translation you can get your hands on. It shouldn't matter who posts them first, you guys should go with the most accurate translation.

The fact that rizu failed to get the がんばちゃ contraction correct alone shows they aren't ready to translate the song. That is pretty simple Japanese, and the translation is quite flawed.

Also, re: 存在感 it doesn't have to be a person, just look in up in a JPN-JPN dictionary: そこに確かに存在しているという実感。I suggest you do the same for all the other words you think have a certain meaning, rizu.

Rizuchan
01-25-2008, 03:01 PM
Ok then, Here are some edits.

Mama's boy -> gourmet

Give me another helping of those Tonkotsu wires, dadada!
->
Give me another helping of that tender Tonkotsu

"Ouch, my pinky!" says the person I stepped on
An exaggerated glimpse of black knee highs

-> "Ouch, my pinky!" The person I stepped on says exaggeratedly
A glimpse of black knee highs

I'll aim for something new this time! -> I'll aim for a new challenge!

You can go ahead and give princessofpep credit for the edits, since she was the one that suggested them.

AzureDark
01-25-2008, 05:23 PM
I've also come back to my senses on this one.

Guess we'll have to bow to the almighty princess orz.

Rizuchan
01-25-2008, 08:01 PM
I can't believe what I'm reading. I want the lyrics of this site to be as accurate as possible too, but princessofpep has outright insulted me. I have tried to be as polite as possible in dealing with this but I am absolutely shocked that a moderator would condone this kind of behavior, much less go back on his word after he made a decision like that.

I will be the first to admit that I am not the most skilled translator here, but that is why I asked for help. I trusted that if my translation had truly been that flawed that it would have been pointed out to me and I either would have fixed the problem or left it to someone more capable. It just shocks me that princessofpep can just post a correction like this the day after I've made my submission and say it is truly in the best interest for the site. I understand that you don't frequent the forums like I do, princessofpep, but if you were truly interested in the well being of the quality of translations, I would think you would like to have more part in the discussion and simple corrections of lyrics rather than simply insisting on replacing the translations you find inadequate.

princessofpep
01-25-2008, 10:55 PM
I wasn't trying to outright attack your translation rizu, and I was a bit blunt in my post because I thought it'd be easier to read/I wanted to save time. However, I felt in your rebuttal that you didn't really understand why I had changed the things I did-- hence why I didn't feel like discussing it further.

But still, in the spirit of fairness, I'll post a more detailed explanation of my translation.

曖昧3センチ そりゃぷにってコトかい? ちょっ!
らっぴんぐが制服…だぁぁ不利ってこたない ぷ。
がんばっちゃ やっちゃっちゃ
そんときゃーっち&Release ぎョッ
汗(Fuu)々(Fuu)の谷間にDarlin' darlin' F R E E Z E!!

A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? cho! (1)
For rapping, a sailor uniform... it isn't a disadvantage, bu.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we catch and release, gyo
Darlin' darling FREEZE in the channel of my sweat, my sweat!!

Well, the song doesn't start off easy, that's for sure. Because of the use of こと here the listener pretty much has to know the reference to school uniform regulations to translate this. ぷに does mean squishy, but also has the connotation of flexible. From goo 辞書: (プニ) 弾力のある柔らかさなどを表現する際に使われる擬態語。

がんばっちゃ is a contraction of がばらなくてはいけない. 〜しなくてはいけない form literally means "to not do [VERB] does not go" which translates into normal English as "has to/must."

The last line is all one phrase, as in, the English is connected to the meaning of the Japanese. Yes, according to rikai-chan 谷間 can mean cleavage, but it also says that あれ can mean genitals ;p These are meanings with an extremely limited usage that rely heavily on context... which is not present here. Edit: I want to elaborate a little on this, because of the construction here it honestly cannot, ever, mean (boob) "cleavage." 汗の谷間 -- 汗 and 谷間 are unmistakably connected because of the の here. I think it's easiest to always start translating の as "(something)'s YY" -- so if you do that here you get "sweat's cleavage" or "cleavage of sweat" -- which makes zero sense due to that face that sweat cannot have cleavage ;p So that's why I used "channel," because it's referring to the path of the girls sweat droplets.

なんかダるー なんかデるー
あいしテるー あれ一個が違ってるんるー
なやみン坊ー 高鉄棒ー
おいしん棒ー いーかげんにシナサイ

A bit tired— something's coming—
I love you— huh, just one letter's different (2)
You wimp— gymnastic high bar—
gourmet— enough already!

Okay, about なんか, when used with a verb it does mean generally mean "something." However when paired with a more adjectival phrase it has a meaning that is... なんか説明しにくい。:laugh: It's a slang usage that means "kinda, somehow, like." I think it's something that's best learned in context. So, watch more anime?

飛んでったアイツの火照るカラダって
所謂ふつーのおにゃのコ
驚いたあたしだけ? 豚骨ハリガネおかわりだだだ

The blazing body of that gal who flew off—
she's what we call a normal girl?
Am I the only one who's surprised?
A second helping of that tender Tonkotsu (3)

張りがね is, like I said, a dialect form of 張りがない. It means something isn't elastic, or tight... like someone could complain that the skin around their eyes 張りがないの ;ー; So hence the "tender."

BON-BON おーえん団
Let's get! チェリーパイ
RAN-RAN かんげー会
Look up! せんせーしょん
はい! 存在感…小惑星
ぶつかって溶けましたぼーぜん
大いに歌ってシレンジャー

BON-BON cheer squad
Let’s get! Cherry pie
RAN-RAN welcome party
Look up! Sensation
Yea! Feels like something's there..
an asteroid bumped into me and crumbled away, whoa!
Sing out, squadron ranger

溶ける does usually mean to melt, but since asteroids are hot it can refer to them dissolving... I just though crumbled sounded better because I figured asteroids feel more solid than liquid-y? I'm open to looking into this more.

もっていけ!
最後に笑っちゃうのはあたしのはず
セーラーふくだからです←結論
月曜日なのに!
機嫌悪いのどうするよ?
夏服がいいのです←キャ?ワ!イイv

Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion (4)
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v (5)

For the Monday thing, I figure most people will equate a bad mood to being because of Monday. But in Japanese the order is a little more fluid, so that's why I switched the English lines.

As for だからです←結論 like I wrote in my note, this is straight written form. When I see it, it looks like an answer off of a student's paper. 結論 -is- sometimes actually marked in Japanese essays, and no one would ever say だからです in conversation. It's the sort of phrase that is pretty much limited to homework assignments. I think it's clever to stick obviously written annotations into lyrics like that though, don't you?

接近3ピクト するまでってちゅーちょだ やん☆
がんばって はりきって My Darlin' darlin' P L E A S E!!

Gettin' close to 3 pics, don't know what to do until you see 'em yan☆ (6)
Do your best, be enthusiastic, my darlin' darlin' PLEASE!!

Like I said above, this one was killer. If anyone can think of a better meaning, please, let me know. ;)

もりあガリー もりさガリー
恋したりー まだ内緒にしといて倫理ー
あまえん坊ー 用心棒ー
つうしん棒ー ちょーしこいてギョクサイ

Risin' up— fallin' down—
lovin' and such— still keep your morals secret—
Spoiled brat— bodyguard—
Report card— get carried away and it'll be an honorable defeat

恋したり is 〜たり〜たり form, but obviously, the other たり is only implied. This form is used to give a couple non-committal options or randomly list things you did out of order.

内緒にしといて is using the 〜しておく form, which means basically to do something for an explicit purpose. The 倫理 is just dangled at the end because, apparently, that's how Aki wanted it ;p

踏んでったアイツに小指イタイって
大袈裟ちらーり黒ニーハイ
絶対じゃん領域じゃん? 生足ツルピカおねだりだだだ

The guy I stepped on says "OW my pinky" all exaggeratedly
A glimpse of black knee highs
Ain't it certain? Ain't it our territory?
Beggin' for smooth, bare legs

I feel like I still may've missed something here. I'm trying to imagine the verse as a whole, but I can't come up with a concrete image of who's doing what here. Any suggestions? I'm trying to figure if the guy who she stepped on is leering at her or if the girls are wishing they didn't have to wear regulation school socks or what...? But since I wasn't 100% sure so I left the translation ambiguous for the time being.


風速3メートル 抱きついてがまんだ ぎゅ☆
胸どっきん 腰ずっきん I'm Sugar sugar S W E E T!!

A wind speed of 3 meters— hold on and bear it gyu☆
My heart beatin' fast, you holdin' tight on my waist, I'm sugar sugar SWEET!!

ずっきん does imply a tightness, and is often used to describe pain. However, 腰 means like, the curve of one's waist and hips. It's the outside of someone, their surface area, and not their stomach, so I translated it as such.

----------------------

I hope that was a bit better? I got bit tired (and I want to play some Xbox hardcore) so I didn't do every verse, but I did give it a shot, at least.

AzureDark
01-26-2008, 02:13 AM
I was as agitated as you were, Rizu, especially the way she came barging in (aponashi), but I hope the explanations she supplied above would be some sorta indication of how much she surpasses you and me in this darn excruciating work.

I've already elaborated about my opinion on how absurd she had been by being aponashi into whatever time you spent doing it in my blog and I sent her a PM too containing a few things (piece of my mind, a PM about correcting her correction, etc), but the reply sorted it out for me.

But must I remind both of you that both of you have your own personal sites, both of you could express your work alternatively on your websites and they're also linked from here. If only this place could have two lyrics for one song (there are loopholes in some cases of course) but we don't work that way, so we can't appease anyone.

I've really tried to let everyone have a fair crack at the whip. Princess could have been punished for 1) being ignorant of forums and 2) aponashi (sorry it's my fave phrase these days) by not letting her corrections up, but as she said, this was against site policy and I can't do anything to contest this. But I begged of princess to please be more stalwart with fellow translators, so hopefully she could actually frequent the forums now and help us all at LD with her vast knowledge.

There's really no winner if we argue over e-pen0r. I myself went through being arse-kicked at the old site (still am by princess, sigh.), but someday it's gonna be our turn to piss off a hopeful translator and make him mute for about a year yes? (happened to me). j/k.

bluepenguin
01-26-2008, 11:26 AM
I'd rather not touch this song, on the whole, because I think it might drive me insane -- both of you are much braver than I to even attempt to translate it. That said, based on the context, I think the meaning of "zettai ryouiki" here is the one described in this article (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ZettaiRyouiki), rather than the literal meaning.

Rizuchan
01-26-2008, 07:55 PM
Jeez Azuredark, if you had just put it like that in the first place you would have saved me so much grief :p
It's all good though. Speaking of individual sites though, princessofpep, I hope you don't mind me using a few of your suggestions to fix my translation up on my website.
And bluepenguin too. That part has always bothered me and that explanation makes sooo much more sense.

princessofpep
01-27-2008, 07:39 AM
Naw, it's cool, no worries~

And OMG Bluepenguin, that is exactly the missing piece of the puzzle I needed... thanks for pointing it out! I'll edit this with a redone translation soon.

Okay, I think I've fixed everything that was bugging me:

A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? cho! (1)
For rapping, a sailor uniform... it isn't a disadvantage, bu.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we catch and release, gyo
Darlin' darling FREEZE in the channel of my sweat, my sweat!!

A bit tired— something's coming—
I love you— huh, just one letter's different (2)
You wimp— gymnastic high bar—
gourmet— enough already!

The blazing body of that gal who flew off—
she's what we call a normal girl?
Am I the only one who's surprised?
A second helping of that tender Tonkotsu (3)

(chatter: Where are my glasses? ...)

BON-BON cheer squad
Let’s get! Cherry pie
RAN-RAN welcome party
Look up! Sensation
Yea! Feels like something's there..
an asteroid bumped into me and disintegrated, whoa!
Sing out, squadron ranger

Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion (4)
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v (5)

Gettin' close to 3 pics, don't know what to do until you see 'em yan☆ (6)
Do your best, be enthusiastic, my darlin' darlin' PLEASE!!

Risin' up— fallin' down—
lovin' and such— still keep your morals secret—
Spoiled brat— bodyguard—
Report card— get carried away and it'll be an honorable defeat

The guy I stepped on says "OW my pinky" all exaggeratedly,
and takes a quick glimpse of my black knee highs
Ain't that the sweet spot, my thighs? (7)
He's beggin' for smooth, satiny, bare legs

MON-MON Legend of the blind monk (8)
Let's go to the parthenon!
YAI-YAI Soran folk songs (9)
What's up? Temptation
Hey! Feels like I'm losing.. money money
If I look for a part time job I'll find one of course,
and then I'll have no worries in my life at all!

Try it!
What I'm aiming at now is my challenge
Even if I change out of my sailor uniform, it still = me
How 'bout the weekend?
Showin' off like always
With a sailor uniform it's so simple = easy life

A wind speed of 3 meters— hold on and bear it gyu☆
My heart beatin' fast, you holdin' tight on my waist, I'm sugar sugar SWEET!!

(chatter: A new... Do you wanna skip class? It is okay if... Huh? ...)

BON-BON MON-MON Day
Let's get! Uh Uh Ah!
RAN-RAN chop chop kick
Look up! Fu Fu Ho!
HI! Education!! Love is ABC
undagadaa undagadaa unyuunya (10)
It gets sunny, I fall in love, but it never comes to fruition la—

Take it!
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion
I'm in a bad mood, what to do?
Even though it’s Monday!
Summer clothes'll fix it ← Cuuute! ^^v

Of course
I’m supposed to be the one who laughs last
Because of my sailor uniform ← That’s the conclusion

A vague 3cm, ain't that a flexible rule? whoa!
For rapping, a sailor uniform... right! it isn't a disadvantage, bo.
Gotta do our best! Gotta do it!
That's when we wear our cap and jersey, ha
If you can see our sweat through 'em darlin' darling be AMUSED!!

(1) What's being referred to here is the regulation on the length of school uniform skirts.

(2) ... between "nanka daru" and "nanka deru," in Japanese this whole verse rhymes.

(3) Tonkotsu is a kind of food. While "harigane/針金" literally means wire, here it's just word play—
in actuality it's being used as a negative, dialect varation form of the verb "haru/張る."

(4) "da kara desu" is written style, and then with "conclusion" marked like it is it gives this line the feel of a written assignment.

(5) The way "cute" is spelled here in Japanese makes a weird smiley: キャ?ワ!イイv

(6) This is referring to those little pictograph people you see on signs that tell you "no smoking" or "these seats are for the elderly" etc.

(7) "zettai ryouiki/絶対領域" refers to the skin showing between the hem of a uniform skirt and the girls' high socks.

(8) This is a legend that originates from the Tendai sect of Buddhism about a blind monk who plays a Japanese lute from door to door.

(9) Souranbushi are traditional fishing songs from the Hokkaidou area.

(10) This is just gibberish like "oo dadada yayaya" would be.