View Full Version : Bleach Fanfiction: Part One Of Four

Hollow Ichigo
07-07-2007, 12:33 AM
Ichigo being the hot head that he was never allowed himself to lose to someone like this. This isn't something he didn't very often and not something he liked. Ichigo was crying as he held Orihime's cold body in his hands. Her life was gone and her love for him had been the only thing that saved him from his death. She loved him so that she threw her life away just to save his. Ichigo had been stupid not to see That she loved him and that she always did what was right to make his life better. "Ori.....hi....me........No No NO Orihime please don't leave me." Ichigo finally understood why he loved her. It was because of who she was and the why she smiled. He had no right to call himself a friend,and didn't have the right to call himself a lover. He did love Orihime and he loved Rukia as well. Now both of the loves in his life were gone. It was because of him the Rukia died and now Orihime to. He didn't understand why everyone that he loved or cared for seemed to just fad away back into the dark void of the death the surronded his life.

"Ichigo.................do you wish to bring her back?" the ark voice of Zangetsu rang into his ears. The spirit of his soul slayer slowly walked from behind him and placed his hand on ichigo's shoulder. "Come with me if you want to save the lives of the ones you love."

Saiyan Destroyer
07-07-2007, 07:35 PM
One broken sentence.

This isn't something he didn't very often and not something he liked.

This isn't something he didn't very often what? I think you mean "This isn't something didn't do very often, nor something he liked." or something like that as long as it's not shattered.

When you have someone talk, I'd make it a new paragraph to be easier to read.