View Full Version : Original Fiction: Falaes Ratem

Altarsian Swordsmaster
05-24-2007, 03:58 PM
Chapter I

It was a warm summer day, nothing unusual, except that it went from being normal, to becoming the most dangerous thing in one kid's life. That kid's name is Envets Alexander, a normal kid just like you or me. He was enjoying his first summer day out in the meadow of Guandom, when he came upon an oak tree not like the others, he examined it thouroughly and discovered one of the biggest holes in a tree he had ever seen. He decided to keep it a secret between him and one of his friends. But who?

The next day, he went to the town plaza, where all his friends went to hang out. He decided the other night that he would tell his friend Topnay, a blonde, smart girl who was one of his best friends. He found her over by the water fountain, with her green eyes and her white clothes. "Hey Topnay," he greeted. "I've got a secret to tell you." Topnay looked up from a book she was reading and asked him what. "Meet me in the meadow, around three P.M." She nodded in the surest of ways and he walked away.

Later that afternoon, he needed to take a shower, for his dirty-blonde hair was gresasy and his big body was stinking. After his shower, he put on his white jacket and leather pants and put on his shoes and headed out the door to the lush-green meadow.

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Was a little short, sorry.

05-24-2007, 05:04 PM
Uhhhhh.......o.....k...... This was completely pointless. You can write decently I see, but that story has almost nothing but fluff. It supposed to be the most dangerous day of his life, but all I see happening is him taking a shower and going to meet some girl.