View Full Version : Original Fiction: Brookie ch 6 (the long awaited chapter!)

05-07-2007, 10:36 PM
Well! It's finally here damnit! *confetti* WOOOO! I have been working on it for over 3 months I think, and I finally finished it. I hope it has enough twists, turns, laughs, surprises, and everything else in it for ya'll. And if you are new to my series, then you can just pm me with your email address and I'll be happy to send them as attachments for you. :3

Introducing! Two new characters based off of AF peeps that I know you all will just love. One shouldn't be too hard to spot, but I doubt any of you will know who the other is. Best of luck guessing and reading!

NOTE: Words in italics are Mary's thoughts.

TIP: When reading Eva's dialogue, try to pronounce the words out loud to help you understand what she is saying. I know it's a bit weird, but you'll get it. :3
The young female that was standing in the doorway of the almost empty classroom was looking curiously where Mary and Brooke were, side by side leaning back against the wall and panting. Because very few of the overhead lights were on in the classroom, it was darker than the hall beyond the open door, and her body and features, for the most part, were hidden in the shadows. Mary only recognized her by the foreign bag that she carried at her side. No one else in the school owned one remotely like it, so she assumed that the girl had gotten it before she came to America.

"Can you close the door, please, Eva."

Eva was quick to heed Mary’s request. She stepped in and carefully closed the door behind her, making the room slightly darker. It was then that Mary saw just how dark it had been when she brought Brooke into the room. She hadn’t noticed it before.

It wasn’t so dark as not to be able to see. Dark enough to not see very clearly, yes, but visibility was still fairly good (save for where Eva stood, which happened to be where several of the overhead lights were off). At least, Mary believed that if it had been too dark then she would feel quite awkward standing there with 2 other girls, as though they were about to play truth-or-dare. But she didn’t feel awkward, just a little embarrassed and surprised. Embarrassed because of what she had just walked in on, and surprised at to see Eva here and now. When they had first met, Eva seemed to be the type of student that liked to be in her seat well before the late bell. That bell would ring any moment now. This Eva, far away from where her first class was located, did not seem very much like the Eva she had first met a little over a week ago.

"Mary…I tink….I am lost. You can help?

Even as she stood there, panting only slightly now, Mary tried not to laugh as Eva spoke. True, Eva’s English was pretty good, but she hesitated a little in the middle of sentences. Added to that her accent, and Mary thought that there was something to laugh about each time she heard her speak. It wasn’t the typical European accent. It certainly wasn’t British or French, or German. It was a bit like…a Polish accent…but much lighter. Her vowels and consonants were soft, making her words run together slightly. But it wasn’t a bad accent at all. In fact, Mary could easily see it as beautiful in certain contexts. Ever since meeting Eva, Mary wondered vaguely if everyone in her country spoke that way. If so, I must go there someday she had thought.

Mary glanced quickly at Brooke, who was also still panting, before replying to Eva’s question.

"Are you trying to find your first period? It’s in a different hallway, Eva. The one right next to this one."

"Dis one, Meary?"

Eva indicated at the wall opposite from where she stood her, and Mary understood that to mean the hallway on the other side of the wall she and Brooke were leaning against.

"Yeah, that one. If you go farther down the hallway there’ll be a shortcut there, so you won’t have to go all the way back to the main hall and be late."

"I…waht? Go which way?"

"Oh, sorry. You go out the door and to the right. The door you want to go through has a window. It will take you to the right hallway."

"Ahhh, tank you Meary. But…I am wondering…why you are here and not in da class…"

Mary’s face flushed. She had been enjoying the refreshing accent in which Eva spoke when she added that small comment, so she was caught off guard. She lifted her arm (it shook slightly) to her head and ran her fingers through her hair to give herself time to think. Each digit slid through the hair follicles easily enough, and when her hand fell down past her ear she spoke.

"Well…I wanted to talk to Brooke about something."

"But…for taht you woud need yur tongue…"

She blushed still deeper, and so did Brooke. What the hell am I supposed to say??? Okay, so she saw us. Well of course she did, we were glued together for about half a minute before I backed off. Great time to be a horn dog Mary. The more she thought about it the more she blushed. Her throat was suddenly dry, so she could no longer speak. But oddly…her tongue still tingled where Brooke’s tongue had touched it…

"Ahh…Eva…is it? I don’t believe we’ve met…"

‘Yess. I mean no, we hav not. You are…a friend of Meary?"


"Closser Meaby?"

"……….yes. I like to think so."

"Ten I will tink taht as well."

Brooke was blushing so hard now that her face was a solid sheet of red. She turned to Mary and smiled a little. Then she gave a small nod.

"Well I need to get to my class, I’m already late. Not that I care all that much."

As Brooke moved closer to the door, Eva stepped to the side smoothly. She let Brooke pass and leave without further comment. The door was shut behind her, and the silence became prevalent once more. Now, where Eva stood within reach of the overhead light nearby, Mary could see her more clearly. Her long, red tinted hair shone in even the dim light. The honey brown eyes behind her rectangular glasses were looking toward the door, and a thoughtful expression was on her face, and on the delicate features that composed it. And what a lovely face it was! The lines of her nose and chin were soft, giving her a truly lovely and youthful appearance. And her cheekbones showed her Slavic decent very clearly.

"We should get going too," Mary said after a few moments silence. She didn’t think it was such a good idea to be admiring Eva’s features, so she walked past her and turned the doorknob. Holding the door open , she turned and looked at her company expectantly. Eva was absorbed in her own thoughts, but it only took a few seconds for her to break out of her reverie and walk to the hall beyond the doorway.

The door closed softly behind her. Mary turned around to look at Eva’s eyes, and held her gaze for a few moments to silently communicate that she should follow her. Then Mary started down the hallway until, about halfway, they reached the shortcut she told Eva about. She pushed open the door with the small window set into it, and they cut through the passageway. When they stepped into the next hallway, Mary pointed the direction of her class to Eva and bid her farewell. Then she started in the opposite direction toward her own class. Not that she really wanted to go to it, it was just English, easy as hell. But her attendance was required for some reason, so she made her slothful way there, her mind racing still with images and sensations that reminded her of what she had just experienced with Brooke. She thought of the how she had pressed Brooke against the wall, felt her soft, supple body respond to her touch, smelled the fragrant scent of Brooke’s perfume. She also thought about that now familiar condensing and dripping sensation that gripped her body whenever Brooke was under the mercy of her passion. Remembering it now, her muscles contracted with desire. She longed to feel Brooke’s body against her own, soft skin against taut skin, locked in a kiss that refused to stop…

It wasn’t until she walked into her first period (just as the bell finished its dull tones) that she remembered WHY her presence there was required. Nicole looked up at her as she entered, and Mary could swear she heard her make some sort of huffy sound.

Crap! How could I forget about Nicole?

Her stomach gave a guilty lurch that she couldn’t stop. She wanted to just leave the room and forget that she had ever entered, but the teacher looked up and gave Mary a look that told her it would be a bad idea to run back into the corridor. So, she reluctantly took her seat two rows in front of where Nicole sat, audibly tutting and tsking loud enough for Mary to hear. Some of the other students sitting around turned to look at them in curiosity, making Mary slide far down her seat until her nose was roughly level with her knees. Well, at least it will hide my blushing she thought.

As the lesson further progressed, Mary could hear Nicole shifting behind her somewhere, clearly detectable over the slight squeak of the marker on the whiteboard and enthusiastic chatter of Mr. Phil at the front of the class (which she vaguely registered was something about syntax). The shifting wasn't particularly out of the ordinary, so the other students seemed to turn return their attentions where they had been before.

Maybe I'll be okay after all....


What, can she read my mind now!?

Mary picked up the book in front of her and stared at the familiar sight of times new Roman on gloss paper. The words and sentences seemed so incredibly familiar...maybe because Mr. Phil had been going over these couple of pages for the last week almost. Some people never get it...probably because they are opting to think about seducing Phil than their text books....stupid people...........OMG WTH!

Something bounced off the back of her head and fell somewhere near her foot. Stunned for a moment, Mary blinked slowly a few times before she realized what was on the floor. A sheet of crumpled lined paper lay in the aisle between her desk and the one next to her, the occupant of which looked down at the paper as well with an odd face. She looked too, and suddenly noticed that, on one of the outside folds, someone had drawn a very crude illustration of a pile of....feces....fresh feces......they were apparently still smoldering.............

The guy sitting closest to the note was overcome in a fit of silent hilarity. Some of the other students snickered as well and pointed the paper out to their neighbors. Soon the half of the class closest to her were craning their necks and shifting in their seats to see what everyone else was so interested in. Quite embarrassed, Mary bent down and picked up the paper. Quickly she smoothed it out on her desk so she could read it. Her eyes flicked left to right across the page, reading at top speed, and feeling her stomach flutter at its contents.

"Oy! I'm trying to teach up here!"

Mr. Phil looked directly into Mary's eyes, an expression of half bewilderment and half amazement on his face. His eyes narrowed and his mouth formed a slight frown (only deepening the attractiveness of his handsome features), and he crossed his arms over his chest. His weight shifted slightly to the ball of his left foot. He seemed to be annoyed at the students' lack of attention, but even more curious about what was causing it. Putting down his marker, he stepped around his desk toward Mary's seat.

Crap crap crap crap crap crap crap crap CRAP!!!

"Hey there missy, what are you reading? It must be really interesting, all my students who don't read the books I assign sure are eager to see what that says."

Mary blushed furiously. Behind her she thought she heard a body shift nervously (as opposed to the rest of the shifting in the room, which seemed to be caused by excitement and anticipation). Mr. Phil was undeniably the coolest teacher in the school, but he wasn't above public humiliation to maintain order in his classroom. Mary was his best student, and she hoped that their friendship would factor into his decision. Well, not so much hoped as prayed.

As the tall teacher reached down and picked up the note, Mary could do nothing but sit and watch in a state of suspended animation. He held the wrinkled sheet loosely in his hand, and Mary could tell by the look on his face that he was reading it and purposefully keeping his face neutral. First one half-glance back at Mary, and then Mr. Phil walked easily to the front of the class. He stopped right at the center of the front of the room, all eyes on him to see what he would do. He paused for a moment (perhaps enjoying his regained spotlight). Mary's heart beat out an oddly catchy tune that she might have found a challenge in DDR.

"Oh Mary, why won't you come back here and let me caress your body like I know you crave!? Remember out night together!? We can have many more to come, oh please, say you'll go to the dance with me!"

Mary's jaw dropped and nearly hit her desk. Mr. Phil was putting on quite a performance, reading the note as if it were a script he was acting out. His voice reverberated throughout the room with such clarity and definitely that he could have been on stage. His wrist met his forehead in the stereotypical dramatic pose that one used to see in black and white movies. The rest of the students were quiet as a mouse, holding in their hysterical laughter until he finished the reading of the note.

"Oh Mary, MARY!! I NEED you!!"

Mr. Phil held his pose, his head tilted back and wrist locked in place, for several long moments. Mary nearly died of embarrassment and disbelief. She was numb. None of her muscles would move at all, not to protest, not to laugh, not to blink. She stared at the form of the dramatic actor, waiting for someone else to do something, anything...

"Uh....Mr. Phil..."

"Quiet Nicole, this isn't the time to be interrupting my Oscar-winning performance."

Mr. Phil's voice had changed back to its usual, friendly tone. His clear blue eyes opened and stared right back into Nicole's, and he smiled. Then, without looking away, he said to Mary, "Ms. Mary, you will stay after class for a few minutes. We need to discuss why you are letting other boys ask you out when you agreed to go to the dance with me."

At that, the air was full of gasps and whoops and sighs, conveying emotions of shock, scandal, jealousy, hilarity, and just about every other feeling one could possibly have. The girls stole envious glances at Mary, and the men frowned and tsked, thinking little of their English teacher's taste in women. Some circles of friends began to openly converse about this new piece of gossip, no doubt plotting the fastest way to spread the news to the most people. Mary could swear she heard one of them suggest breaking into the principals office and "borrowing" the intercom.

She sunk low in her chair, and did not move or make a sound all period. Neither did Mr. Phil indicate that she hide herself less, or participate in the lesson along with the rest of the class. This was perfectly find to her. She still couldn't believe what just happened. No way...Mr. Phil.....he just...........WHY!?

Mary frowned (on the inside, her muscles would not further move) and completely disregarded all thoughts about syntax and phonemes. Not that she had been paying much attention before, but now she was even more distracted than ever. She felt a surge of conflicting emotions in her mind that completely absorbed her thoughts.

Mr. Phil.....the note......his reading......why did he act so dramatically? I gotta admit he's got some real skills there....with his looks he could have been an actor, not a teacher......oh damn me, why am I thinking of THAT? I wonder what Nicole is thinking......she must be feeling like I am. But probably even more confused...he specifically said that he wouldn't include her in our after class discussion...she must be feeling left out......well this is her damn fault in the first place! Throwing that stupid paper at me...and what was with that drawing! She just wanted to get my attention, no doubt. Well, it sure did get me to open it. And the note itself...oh man..........I'm never going to live this down am I?

Mary was brought back to earth by the shuffling sounds of the rest of the class leaving. She jumped to her feet and felt her head spin a little from dizziness. Sitting (or rather laying) in that position had not been comfortable, so say the least. She rubbed the back of her neck to try and release some of the tension, but didn't get anywhere. The rest of the class seemed to be stealing more glances at her. Probably they were considering skipping their second periods, but thinking about how hard it would be to eavesdrop with ALL of them there. At that thought she let a small and nervous laugh out, which did not go unheard (and unteased about) by the rest of the students, save Nicole. She merely packed up her stuff and hustled out of the room as quickly and out of character as possible. It wasn't long before she and Mr. Phil were the last ones in the room.

"Mr. Phil, I--"

"Oh Mary, you are so lucky I didn't really read the note out loud."

"I know....thank you....I really do appreciate it sir..."

"What, I show you a friend's kindness and now you are calling me 'sir'?"

"I'm just so stunned is all....and now the school thinks you have the hots for me..."

Mr. Phil laughed gently at this and did not break eye contact. Mary, however, did.

"Mary, do you think that I don't know who sent you that note?" he said soothingly. "I grade everyone's homework, I know my students' handwriting when I see it."

05-08-2007, 12:49 PM
Cant wait for 7 =3

Yugure's Goddess
05-12-2007, 01:48 AM
YAY! Cappy did Chappy 6! (totally wants to abuse the -appy ending crappy!)

Anyway... very very nice. I wantith more but I won't start a riot. I'll wait... I'll wait as patiently as I can anyway... Philly knows!! ^_^


05-24-2007, 06:48 PM
Awsome......Oo Truly stunned. *bows down* Awsome Mary dear. I always enjoy Brookie. Can't wait 'till chapter 7!!!!!!!!
~Your Anna~

06-04-2007, 11:27 AM
Wow...that is some wikked awesome writing. Reppies for your work are due!


06-30-2007, 08:15 AM
I found some parts of the story really intriguing, quite a good story you have going.