hated..

[LittleMomo]

I unleashed my dark side,
this thing that I truely hide.
Now that I lost affection,
he turns to attention,
I am hated more,
all I get is pain and sore,
but it all builds up inside,
as my dark side doesn't want to hide,
it now appears,
destroying everything, making it clear,
for it once had a heart,
that was nice and never taken apart,
now that I have this,
I'll never forget those Moments of bliss,
when I get pain in the end,
even so, I don't even have a friend,
from now on I am hated,
for the mistakes I created.....
-----------------------------

[Tsuneki]

nice keep it up

[yami hatake]

Such a sad poem..but still very good..and you do have a friend!!..you have me..because I'm here to listen to ya..~yami

[Aleyna]

if people hate you for your mistakes they obviously judged you at a bad time

love your mistakes, they'll help you grow and keep you a stronger and happier person deep inside for yourself

[viewtyjoe]

I will continue the trend of "keep writing, it's good," but give you one specific piece of criticism (crowd gasps).

If you're going to write an end-rhyming poem, the most important concern is not the actual rhymes, but the rhythm and cadence of the poem. There are a couple of lines that break the rhythm you have going, based on the placement of commas. If you only insert commas into the lines where a pause is necessary, it'll do a lot to maintain the flow and rhythm that I see in this poem. Once again, keep up the good work, and don't stop writing.

[chii-fan-lover]

ooooo... so angry
Grrrrr........
nice poem btw! ^^

[Yukari]

Very mad and sad. but I still liked it. Great poem