View Full Version : Original Fiction: The n00bie Code... Chapter One

06-20-2006, 06:33 AM

Member Name was totally sleeping when his hotels phone started ringing. "Uughhhnr?" He mumbled in the darkness reaching around for the bulky object. "Gyyahh?" He said into the reciever.
"Monsieur Name?" Some guy said. "Sorry to totally pwn ur sleep, but... some dude from the popo is here and he wants to bug you about some symbols or some crap."
"igughgh.." Member replied, still drowsy."he said it's like, a matter of a banning or something?" The dude on the phone said, confused.
"Der?" Member replied, "Tell him to p00p on himself." He said, about to hang up the phone.
"BUT HE'S A POPO OFFICER!111111" The dude on the phone said urgently.
"God, fine. WTCEVER."

Member Name knew he was popular with all kinds of n00bs and 1337 haxxorz. But he wanted to sleep and he wasn't in the mood to hear some kid whine about how his lecture the night before at the grand chatroom of Anime Forum was lame and "poo". He defintely wasn't in the mood to hear some wanna bee haxxor n00b like Redfield to try to argue with him like he knew what he was talking about. But if it was the popo, he guessed he could deal with it. He told the dork on the phone to send him up.

He took the time to ponder the previous night. He had the lecture on how to not be completely wrong when trying to insult someone on the internet. And how various symbols that you wouldn't think to be insulting, actually were. Symbols such as :ninja: and ; ;. Various things you wouldn't think twice about, but when used in an argument, they could show that the person was cunning and adaptive to the art of pwnage.

Disrupting him from his thoughts, there was a loud knock on the door. He went to open it and there was an annoying little french man staring up at him.
"yo' professah. me boss sent me over to show you dis pictur. beware tho, cus it's pretty graphic."
Member Name took the photograph from his hand, and then immediately dropped it. It was that terrifying. "Who would ever do such a thing to another human being?!"



"you n00b he didn't have sum1 do it to him! he did it himself!"
"OMG WTC?!?!?!!?!?!?!?" Member asked going O_O!

"ya so well cuz ur so good and pwning ppl, we thought u'd know the dudes work n'stuff." The little short nub said, walking into the room and grabbing Member Name's coat for him.
"Uh...? What're you doing with my coat?" He asked, yanking it out of his hands.
"duuuuh, dats y im here! my boss detecteve leon lol oh wiat lolozlz thats from the professional lol wrong movie." The little nub doubled over in hysterical laughter at his mistake.
"Right, and you're point is...?" Aaron asked, getting rather annoyed.
"o ya! masali wants u there rite away lol."
"Okay. Where is he?"
"at da loo."
"He's in the bathroom?"
"nooo da loooove."
"nub, you're sure annoying. What's your name?"
"Gene the Man, duuuhhh. lolz. anyway, detective masali wanted your assistance and crap."
"...Gene The Man... I seem to remember something about... OH YES.

gene the man has been banned by Member Name.

OWNED. lolz."

Name took that time to ponder what exactly that short little dude actually wanted. Oh yes, I guess he'd have to go to the crime scene now huh? He looked at the photograph again. And to think, he was supposed to meet that man earlier in the evening. He wondered what would have happened if he had met him before he died. He felt a sudden overwhelming loss... Like something was missing...

He shrugged it off and headed towards the lourve. hopefully they'd have coffee.

06-20-2006, 09:18 PM
I R Detective =D

Ironically, I loved it. Portrayed in a not-so-flattering light, but I enjoyed it nonetheless.

06-20-2006, 09:19 PM
Wow... That was..... amazing. I almost cried... ; ; Anyway, great job. I hope the next chapter will be as.... exiting?

06-24-2006, 06:32 PM