百人

[HairyCockroach]

私のフェーシブックは百人がいません。でも、友達は大好きです。私の一番友達はTimやよしやチェズニです 。
心はどきどきいつでTimを見ます。Timがアリゾナにすんでいます。かれはギーターをする。たくさんギー ターがあります。
よしはマリオのヨシが大好きです。かれは新しいヨシアイランドのゲームをしたいです。私もよしとしたいです 。
チェズニがカナダ人です。かれはマックドナルドをよく食べます。今日は新しいコンピューターを着ました。と てもすごいです。でも、きたないです。
私のぜんぶ友達がやさしいですよ。

Any feedback or responses would be greatly appreciated.
P.S. Does anyone know the masu-form for suru (to play an instrument)? I've completely forgotten.

[ParaParaJMo]

私のフェーシブックは百人がいません。

When you want to say Facebook, the proper katakana spelling for face is フェイス. And after 百人, you should add の友達 to make the term more complete meaning "I do not have 100 friends on facebook."


友達は大好きです

Instead of は, you say が to say "I love my friends." When you use は, you are saying "My friends love it."


一番友達

The proper term for best friend is 親友　しんゆう


心はどきどきいつでTimを見ます

I know what you are trying to say, but the proper way to say "Looking at Tim makes my heart beat" is テイムを見ながら、心がどきどきする

When you want to say he plays the guitar, instead of する, you use ひく. You also use this with playing the violin, the piano, or any string instrument.


今日は新しいコンピューターを着ました

When you say that his new computer arrived today, replace the を　with が. を　indicates that someone is doing the action.

And the masu form of する　is します

[HairyCockroach]

Thank you for your help. You're really organized with your reviews and it makes it much easier to understand what I'm doing wrong.
I was having a hard time remembering the two verbs for playing instruments. I remembered ふります but not ひく. Would ひく become ひきます?

[ParaParaJMo]

yeah it does. and you are welcome. but i understand you are out of practice for sometime. i know the feeling at times.

[HairyCockroach]

We're both getting back into Japanese shape then.

[RyuTama]

Shitsurei shimaaasu~.


I know what you are trying to say, but the proper way to say "Looking at Tim makes my heart beat" is テイムを見ながら、心がどきどきする

Could it not also be "ティムを見るときに、心がドキドキする"? So it's like "when I look at" or "at times I look at". Whereas 見ながら is more like "as I look at" or "while I look at", no? Or is there not much of a difference?

[ParaParaJMo]

Well you could use both but しながらis used a lot based on my experience.

Either 彼を見たらドキドキする or 彼を見ながら、ドキドキする。彼を見る時には is gramatically correct but rarely used from my experience.

[animeyay]

Could it not also be "ティムを見るときに、心がドキドキする"? So it's like "when I look at" or "at times I look at". Whereas 見ながら is more like "as I look at" or "while I look at", no? Or is there not much of a difference?
There are several ways to express this, each with a slightly different connotation.

ティムを見ながらドキドキする。
While I'm looking at Tim, my heart races.

ティムを見るとき[に]、心がドキドキする。
When I see Tim, my heart races.

ティムを見るたび[に]、心がドキドキする。
Whenever I see Tim, my heart races.

ティムを見ると、心がドキドキする。
Upon seeing Tim, I feel my heart race.

[HairyCockroach]

...If I can't say it correctly now, then I'm a lost cause.

[Tim Nunyabizness]

:smooch:

[ParaParaJMo]

まあ、英語と同じように日本語にも表現がいっぱいありますね

[HairyCockroach]

まあ、英語と同じように日本語にも表現がいっぱいありますね

わかりません。。。

[ParaParaJMo]

I said like English, Japanese also has many expressions

[HairyCockroach]

Sorry. I am not so skilled in Japanese. XD It's true though. There's a million ways you can say any phrase.

[ParaParaJMo]

だいじょうぶ。きにしないでください

[HairyCockroach]

I decided to take everything I've learned and rewrite the paragraph. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

私のフェイスブックは二十八人の友だちがいます。でも、三人はしん友。この三人はティムやよしやチェズニ。 この三人が大好き。
ティムを見ながら、心がドキドキする。でも、アリゾナにすんでいます。ギーターをひく。それは、たくさんギ ーターがあります。
よしはマリオのヨシが大好き。あたらしいヨシアイランドをしたい。私もしたい。
チェズニがカナダ人。マックドナルドをよく食べる。あたらしいニンテンド3DSを買いました。でも、色はわ かりません。
私のしんゆうがやさしいですよ。

[Rizuchan]

Sorry to butt in, but I'm genuinely curious, isn't "心がドキドキする" a little strange? I was always under the impression that 心 was more of a figurative heart or soul and wouldn't refer to a physical heartbeat. Wouldn't 胸がドキドキする, or just ドキドキする be more natural?

(I'm resisting the urge to suggest just using a line from a certain K-ON! song...)

[animeyay]

Sorry to butt in, but I'm genuinely curious, isn't "心がドキドキする" a little strange? I was always under the impression that 心 was more of a figurative heart or soul and wouldn't refer to a physical heartbeat. Wouldn't 胸がドキドキする, or just ドキドキする be more natural?

(I'm resisting the urge to suggest just using a line from a certain K-ON! song...)
I don't see a problem with "心がドキドキする", since "心" indeed figuratively refers to one's feelings and emotions, just like "胸" in this case. I don't think when you say "胸がドキドキする" you mean your bosom is physically beating lol. I think "ドキドキ" in this case, too, is used figuratively as well, as in "excited"/"nervous". So yes, "胸がドキドキする" and "ドキドキする" sound natural, but I don't think "心がドキドキする" sounds less natural.

When you use "ドキドキ" in a more literal and physical sense, as in "心臓がドキドキする", I believe you would be talking about more like the medical condition palpitation (irregular heartbeat). But hey, I think we need a native speaker to offer some insight into the question you raised. This is simply my personal opinion~