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burningsteel
03-11-2012, 01:40 PM
Hello, I am translating the Claymore Opening by Nightmare Raison D'Etre. There are a couple parts where I am unsure of, and some assistance would be helpful.

レゾンデートル
《CLAYMORE》OP
歌:ナイトメア(NIGHTMARE)

Ah 幾つもの夜を越えて
凍った夢と 消えゆく涙
Warm me, Warm me, Wrap me

Ah, How many nights have I gone through,
With frozen dreams and vanishing tears,
Warm me, Warm me, Wrap me

一度全てを忘れたはずなのに
人を愛せない此(こ)の身が憎い
どこまで歩いても終わりが見えない
過去の記憶を道連れに
此の身は何色に染まりゆくのだろう
答えを探している

Even though once I was supposed to have forgotten everything,
I hate this body that cannot love people,
No matter how far I walk I cannot see the end,
Burdened with memories of the past,
I wonder what colors will stain this body,
I search for the answer

もう 戻れない 決別の日
深く根ざした 傷は消えない
Hide it, Hide it, Hide me

I can no longer return to that day of parting,
These deep scars will not disappear,
Hide it, Hide it, Hide me

両手に持ちきれないほどの星屑
ひとつ、またひとつ宙(そら)に返して

The stardust that will not disappear as long as I hold them with my hands,
One by one, I return them to the sky

/*
That second line I am not really sure of. ひとつ、またひとつ宙(そら)に返して. The way I reading it seems that "one by one" the singer is returning the stardust. Correct?
*/

弱くて惨めな自分はあの頃
何も知らずに生きていた
それでも いつでも 明日(あす)を夢見ては
指折り数えていた

At that time, the weak and miserable me,
Was living without knowing anything,
However, always, whenever I dreamed of tomorrow
I would count them on my fingers

/*
These two lines have the singer counting on his fingers whenever the singer dreams of tomorrow. Is this right?
*/

生きる意味など 知らないままでいい
いつか笑える日が来るのならば

It's ok to not know such a thing as the meaning of living
as long as someday I can laugh comes,

あの日、貴方の言葉ひとつで
強くなれる気がしたよ
「何も変わらないで 今のままでいい」と

That day, you, with only a couple words,
Made me feel that I could become stronger
"Do not change anything, Being as you are is fine."

/*
Obviously that other person said something to the singer, but the lyrics do not have any verb. Do you think I should use a verb like "said" or "spoke"?
*/

今でも
心のどこかに 貴方がいるから
迷わずに歩いて行ける
終わりが見えなくてもいいと思えたよ
旅ゆくエトランジェ 答えは知らなくていい

Even now,
Because you are somewhere in my heart,
I can unwaveringly keep walking forward,
Even if I cannot see the end it was good, I thought,
A foreigner on a journey who is fine without knowing the answer

/*
と思えたよ is past tense...but should it be present? present progressive tense? The whole stanza seems to be set with the first line 今でも, but then there is the past tense verb in the middle. It seems a bit jarring so that is why I am asking if I could/should change it.
*/