Sun-Freeze

[Anime-Prince]

Echoes of the Autumn cycle
Fall into a fraying wallet
Remnants of a slow life
Perched on the end of a branch

The green grass becomes brown
Used and old, stained outside
Drenched from the falling water
Trampled by the feet of the living

The puddles fill with murky water
Grey and black, floating enzymes
Random bubbles of air escaping
Just to pop, if they breech the surface

Yet all is not as bleak as it seems
As the sun, visiting vision, reminds us
Peeking from the cardboard clouds
It warms our spirits with spring hope

It pulls away the dirt, evaporates grime
The grass reclaims it's emerald glory
It rebuilds the undecorated trees of old
And begins a brand new, nature-story.

[Kirei Shijin]

This poem is a MASTERPIECE! <3 I LOVE it!

[SigmaSD]

I agree with Kirei. I love how it felt as if nature was cleansing itself of mans pollution. Its sad to see natural beauty go down the hole.

I love this poem very much, great choice of words to inspire.

[Shinn Kamiyra]

I understand the idea behind the poem, but I feel as if you're trying too hard to be descriptive; your words being too straightforward and not leaving me with a necessary mystique in order to garner my thoughts and feelings.