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Thread: How do you deal with loss?

  1. #1
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    Default How do you deal with loss?

    How would you deal with the loss of a loved one? it could be a person or a pet. What would first come to mind? What would you do? How would this effect you?
    I should have seen it in the sky at first, but now i see it in her eyes fireworks.
    All i see is fireworks, every night it's fireworks, all i see is fireworks, taking off like fireworks. - Drake feat Alicia Keys

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    The best way for me is to just cry about it, you know get it out, the love will never go away completely but it makes it easier if you deal with it right away instead of having it build up

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    I would upset about it but i wouldn't hide my feeling I would try to get rid of all the negative feeling and learn to accept it.

  4. #4
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    I Tweet about it to no one in particular.
    No one follows me, and I don't follow anyone, but I find Tweeting my feelings out as I'm feeling them to help a lot.

    EDIT: This isn't just for the loss of a loved one, it basically applies to every type of loss.
    Last edited by sa5m; 03-24-2010 at 01:50 PM.

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    Mourning and time.
    While time will always pass, mourning is an effort you have to take care of yourself.


    The rewards of tolerance are treachery and betrayal.

  6. #6
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    Carry with the memories and experience of said person.

    Remember, it's not the physical person that you miss, it's the realisation that those memories are the last of those that you will ever get a chance to know a person.

    ^by Hakuchuumu^

    ^Xey Oiz^

    The Brighter the Light the Darker the Shadow

  7. #7
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    i go for a walk and think about that person and then ahve a couple of beers and im okay, its like magic

  8. #8
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    It all depends on who it is. For example if it were my gf I would not take it well. Though she would no want me to be sad for to long so I would do my best to deal with it the rest of my life.
    Gero Server Guru




  9. #9
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    I'd probably cry at first and then be really sad, thinking about this person for a long time. Then I'll remember all the good times and bad times we've had together for some healing. Along with time too.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Zedekiah View Post
    Mourning and time.
    While time will always pass, mourning is an effort you have to take care of yourself.
    Same with me.
    But my "mourning" is just me not acting my self.
    I don't remember the last time I cried but, I won't be my happy/cheery self.
    I'll probably snap at a lot of people, ruling no one out in particular.

    But loss of a love one in a relationship (breakups, since it's consider a "loss to me"): I'd probably hitting up the gym, and saying hello to my good friend the punching bag.
    the lovely miss keri hilson - - -

    Not taking any sig/av request - - -

  11. #11
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    I know exactly how I'd feel because my mom passed a year ago. Actually, March 18th was the day she died, so it only just became a year some days ago. When I first heard, I think I was just too shocked to cry, I didn't believe it. My dad called telling me she wouldn't wake up. When I rushed over, a coroner was already there. I just saw her there, still in her bed as if she were sleeping. Even then, I still didn't cry. Instead I was just consoling my dad and trying to take care of everything.

    At the funeral, that's when I just fell apart. I guess it had finally hit me. She wasn't just my mom, but a best friend to me. She was the only piece of family besides my cousin and my grandma (who's already in a moderate/serious stage of Alzheimer's) that I actually felt connected to. So I can tell from experience (she's not the only close person I've lost, but definitely THE closest so far.) that you can take a guess how you'd act if you lost someone... but till it happens, all bets are off for how you'll TRULY react. I'm still going through my grieving and I probably will for a very long time.

    I admit, I try to block her out of my memory a lot because it hurts so much less that way, but she'll never truly leave my mind and to be honest- I'd never wish her to. I guess I grieve kinda different. I feel I can't just let it out completely because if I do, I just won't stop. I know I wouldn't. A lot of people think I've handled my mom's death amazingly well... and I'm sure some think I don't even care because I just don't display those emotions out right. But I just grieve different. Whenever my mom would leave and we'd say our goodbyes, I'd hug her as if it were the last time I'd ever see her just because I never wanted to take it for granted... and even with those grateful hugs, it wasn't enough. Nothing can really prepare you for such things.

  12. #12
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    Time is the best healer..this is what I believe in..Okay, so first of all, when I hear about the loss, I don't try to behave courageously and sit around people as if it didn't affect you...I just cry and do whatever I feel like but in my limits and actually lighten my spirit.. If you don't do that then, you'll regret it afterwards...

    Second, I try to explain myself why that mishap occurred and then I try to prepare myself to move further because, hey, no matter what happens, my life hasn't ended and I have to move on.

    Third, I try to forget about that person. and by forgetting I don't mean I throw him out of my life..I try to forget this that he's no more with me. I mean, I just believe he is there with me and someday I will be meeting him again. It's silly but I still believe I'll be meeting those people who died long ago. In anyway, sooner or later, I'll meet my end, and then, I will meet that person and I have o prepare myself for the reunion. I can't show myself a complete loser infront of him..just think how bad he'll feel.

    Then, as I said in the beginning, time is the best healer and soon I overcome the loss. We all do..we just don't realize this....

  13. #13
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    I lost a teacher of mine last month and she was really close to me. It hit me really hard when 14 told me in the band room. I had to run out of the room and cry in the rotunda. Afterwards, when someone would mention her, I'd cry. When I got home that day, I cried for hours and sat on the computer. I didn't even do homework. Later on, when I took a shower, I talked to myself in the shower and prayed and hoped she was listening.

    ^^That's how I deal with the death of anything. I become very sad and talk to myself. I pray and eventually I can carry on with daily life. I still remember them and time to time I become sad again because of the memories. I never officially "move on".

    "Thinking of you, where ever you are..."
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  14. #14
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    If it's my iPod, I don't know what I would doooooo!11 Prolly kill mahself.


  15. #15
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    The simplest answer is to seek revenge. Especially if my loved one is taken by a force of nature. Which is why we all must litter.

    face·less –adjective 2.lacking personal distinction or identity


  16. #16
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    I bottle it up. Until one day many years later, when I'm sitting in my car in a heatwave, in my horn rimmed glasses and my white shirt in a traffic jam that isn't moving an inch...

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  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.McDoom!: Released View Post
    If it's my iPod, I don't know what I would doooooo!11 Prolly kill mahself.
    Then you would be an hero to everyone!!!!

    Concerning the topic, my reaction to losing something would really depend on what's lost an in what context it was lost. If it's a family member whose been sick for years upon years and finally passed, a sense of grief and comfort would more or less be my emotions at the time. If it's a freak accident, I wouldn't know to be honest since I've never experienced that yet and can't say for sure.

    I'm more of the laid back guy in the crowd, trying to provide a sense of laughter to others when they're in grief, telling stories, sharing a few pints. I'm still fairly young to discuss this as a whole since I haven't much experience in it... call me back in 20 years!

  18. #18
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    I really close friend of mine died in a accident last week, and honestly, I really didn't know how to handle it. I didn't cry, I dont even know if I was truely sad, I was more confused, thought it might hit me later on. It just seemed awkward. This isn't the first time someone I knew died, but I have a lot of great memories hanging out with him, and its weird knowing that I won't see him again. It made me feel like I didn't have a heart or something. And then in turn it kinda depressed me knowing that.
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  19. #19
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    The thing is that most of the time i don't know when things affect me. When my grandfather died two years ago, i never knew how it affected me until my mom brought it up, she said i was back chatting and having an attitude with everyone. How would you know when this loss is effecting you or not? Most of the time i just cry before i go to bed and don't really stop, it feels like a never ending paraide of sadness.
    I should have seen it in the sky at first, but now i see it in her eyes fireworks.
    All i see is fireworks, every night it's fireworks, all i see is fireworks, taking off like fireworks. - Drake feat Alicia Keys

  20. #20
    Senior Member Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee has a reputation beyond repute Bugsiee's Avatar
    Gil
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hideki Motosuwa. View Post
    I'd probably cry at first and then be really sad, thinking about this person for a long time. Then I'll remember all the good times and bad times we've had together for some healing. Along with time too.
    If you just cry wouldn't that make it harder to move on?
    I should have seen it in the sky at first, but now i see it in her eyes fireworks.
    All i see is fireworks, every night it's fireworks, all i see is fireworks, taking off like fireworks. - Drake feat Alicia Keys

  21. #21
    soñando a estar vivo Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler has a reputation beyond repute Schindler's Avatar
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    I would just let all my feelings run free. That's the best way I learned to cope with such a think happening to me. If I lost my pet, or a loved one, I guess I would go into deep depression. I get attached easily, and this would have a great affect on me.


    siggy by Nephilim

  22. #22
    Cardinal of Eden Vital Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia has a reputation beyond repute Rolo Vi Britannia's Avatar
    Gil
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    I actually tend to be the type who deals with it badly before I lose them. If they're sick, when I find that out, I cry. However, when they die, I'm as cold as ice. Makes me think there's something wrong with me every time.
    I'm most likely getting down repped for this,lol.


    I have recently transformed into a defender of the mentally ill. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

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