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Thread: The Joke

  1. #1
    Psychic Amnesiac Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default The Joke

    The Joke


    The day was February 2. The setting, Philosophy class. It seemed to be a normal enough day. As usual, everyone in class was either taking obsessive-compulsive notes or was in a zombie-like daze of boredom. The teacher, off on his random, irreverent tangent, was paying little attention to my row.

    The guy next to me turns his head. "Want to hear a joke?"he asked nonchalantly.

    "Sure." I answered, figuring it would be innocent enough.

    Little did I know this joke would change my life forever.

    "What did the injured cats say to each other?"

    "I don't know." I replied, eager to cut to the chase.

    "Me-ouch."

    There was a brief moment of silence, in which the sheer horrendous nature of the joke settled in. No one in the room could believe a jest that abhorrent could be spawned on our fair earth. It felt as if claws of stupidity were tearing at my mind.

    Suddenly, the girl behind me committed suicide on the spot. Full scale riots broke out over the Four Corners area, with murder, looting, and rape. Cries of "How could that punchline be so horrible? What god would allow this?" could be heard as people leaped from rooftops. The Me-ouch riots had begun.

    The area had to be carpet-bombed by the Air force in order to quell the riots and make sure no traces of the horrid humor escaped the infected area. The entire state of New Mexico was quarantined, and everything we ever held dear was either bombed or destroyed by the insipid setup and punchline.

    A girl next to me said she believed things couldn't possibly get worse. When her brother heard the joke, he ate their mother, burned down their house and killed himself.

    Suddenly, the sounds of a million infants shrieking pierced the air. A hundred-armed demon with a thousand unpronounceable names rose from a fissure in the earth, "I have been summoned to your meager plane by the horror of the unspeakable humor. I Gorroslejedkrakish'urtzar, the apparition who was never meant to be, shall now devour the universe," spoke the demon with it's three-hundred maws.

    "Good going," I said to the guy, who had miraculously survived up to this point.

    "How was I supposed to know the joke would summon a nameless horror from the beginning of time?"

    "Me-ouch!?" I shouted, rage in my voice, "What good did you possibly believe could come of that!"

    Gorroslejedkrakish'urtzar devoured the universe and shat it out as a cosmic dung pile.

    The end.


    The moral of the story: Don't tell jokes from stupid, juvenile joke books.
    Last edited by Zandan; 03-01-2010 at 06:39 PM. Reason: Title wrong

  2. #2
    Kirako's medic soldier Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com has a reputation beyond repute Nightixu@hotmail.com's Avatar
    Gil
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    Hahaha i love this story. Its hilariously good. ^^

  3. #3
    Junior Member Micheal Hilton is on a distinguished road Micheal Hilton's Avatar
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    When he understood their intention, he asked
    them to put the curtains and the flowers back. Couldn't understand,
    the ladies asked for the reason. He said, "where I came from,
    people used whip and chain to excite their libido. Flowers and
    curtains make me feel more romantic, hahaha!" Then, he put his
    thing through the window and started stroking. The girl chanted,
    "Hey yo..., hey yo..., hey yo...!" following his rhythm. Few
    minutes later, a lady inside shouted, "Floo~d...!" Then, another
    lady shouted, "Run for your life~!"

  4. #4
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    Omg Zan XD that made me laugh. It was great.


    「そんな顔をしないで。また会えるよ、シンジ君」
    ---

    もう二度と会えないなんて信じられない
    まだ何も伝えてない
    まだ何も伝えてない


    I'm sorry (not) sorry.

  5. #5
    Psychic Amnesiac Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan's Avatar
    Gil
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    Quote Originally Posted by Micheal Hilton View Post
    When he understood their intention, he asked
    them to put the curtains and the flowers back. Couldn't understand,
    the ladies asked for the reason. He said, "where I came from,
    people used whip and chain to excite their libido. Flowers and
    curtains make me feel more romantic, hahaha!" Then, he put his
    thing through the window and started stroking. The girl chanted,
    "Hey yo..., hey yo..., hey yo...!" following his rhythm. Few
    minutes later, a lady inside shouted, "Floo~d...!" Then, another
    lady shouted, "Run for your life~!"
    This is strangely amusing, though it be completely irrelevant and has absolutely nothing to do with anything I wrote. It sounds like horribly disguised sexual innuendo...I may be wrong...

    @Riiko Well, if you laughed, then I have done my job well.
    I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'm going to forget.

    Children in backseats will cause accidents. Accidents in backseats can bear children.

    The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, and the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn?


    Made by Hakuchuumu

  6. #6
    桜流し
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    The horrible thing is his username sounds suspiciously like someone I know. It ain't even disguised. =D


    「そんな顔をしないで。また会えるよ、シンジ君」
    ---

    もう二度と会えないなんて信じられない
    まだ何も伝えてない
    まだ何も伝えてない


    I'm sorry (not) sorry.

  7. #7
    Psychic Amnesiac Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan's Avatar
    Gil
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    I know someone by the name of *cough*Michael*cough*bad spelling Mr. Hilton*cough cough cough hack cough*

    Anyone have a Ricola?

    But the Michael I know isn't a Hilton.
    I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'm going to forget.

    Children in backseats will cause accidents. Accidents in backseats can bear children.

    The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, and the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn?


    Made by Hakuchuumu

  8. #8
    Stuck in Love's Capture Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara has a reputation beyond repute Kaname Shikara's Avatar
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    This was a funny one ^^ it made me laugh as well.

    Amazing set by
    Ezza Obsuna ^^

    The days fly by and the feelings remain
    So far away and causing us pain
    That's okay we'll make it through
    Soon we'll get to say "I love you"



  9. #9
    桜流し
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    Hmm not really, it's more like something to do with where I work. My boss's name is Michael and the place I work at is Hilton Gifts...I suspect it may be his son though. *cough* It is weird.

    -Hands box of Ricolas to Zan-
    Last edited by Rei; 04-07-2010 at 01:35 AM.


    「そんな顔をしないで。また会えるよ、シンジ君」
    ---

    もう二度と会えないなんて信じられない
    まだ何も伝えてない
    まだ何も伝えてない


    I'm sorry (not) sorry.

  10. #10
    Psychic Amnesiac Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan has a reputation beyond repute Zandan's Avatar
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    @Mistress Kirako I'm glad you liked it.

    @Riiko Stalker? O_O

    Thanks for the Ricola.
    I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'm going to forget.

    Children in backseats will cause accidents. Accidents in backseats can bear children.

    The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, and the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn?


    Made by Hakuchuumu

  11. #11
    桜流し
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    It would be Creepy and not at all nice if one of them stalked me. No, I'm tempted to bad rep him to see what would happen...

    Np-
    Last edited by Rei; 04-08-2010 at 04:26 AM.


    「そんな顔をしないで。また会えるよ、シンジ君」
    ---

    もう二度と会えないなんて信じられない
    まだ何も伝えてない
    まだ何も伝えてない


    I'm sorry (not) sorry.

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