Now I'm not going to hold your hand or tell you that this latest is in any way good.
The c4d's you've used are too obvious and not blended well compared to your other work, I don't know what you've got at the forefront of the whole image that looks like rainfall but its really distracting and takes from the overall quality. First step to improving this tag is to take away that layer completely.
Unlike Zenister I disagree with her comment about the "dark swoops", they just throw the whole concept of lighting out of the window. As for the tetx it just needs to be removed completely and placed elsewhere else in a different font, I'd say in a bold font over her left shoulder, Zenister very suprsingly made a good comment about what the colour of the text should be.
However if toned down the lighting on the eye would be a nice touch. And the overall concept is tight, but it might be your being rusty but the execution just isn't up to par.
Now don't get me wrong I'm not just completely stating this piece to be insulting, I'm just giving you a thorough CnC in hopes something I've said can help you improve next time.