Another one that is like... O.o; bad, so, deleted
AnimeGalleries [dot] Net | AnimeWallpapers [dot] Com | AnimeLyrics [dot] Com | AnimePedia [dot] Com | AnimeGlobe [dot] Com |
Another one that is like... O.o; bad, so, deleted
Last edited by Kaname Shikara; 05-05-2011 at 05:19 PM.
Amazing set by Ezza Obsuna ^^
The days fly by and the feelings remain
So far away and causing us pain
That's okay we'll make it through
Soon we'll get to say "I love you" ♥
No poem is bad, you just have to rearrange things sometime. In my opinion it was okay I got the message you were trying to give off in the poem. The one thing I see though is that you separated the sentence in weird places which threw off the flow of the poem. I think it was because you were trying too hard to rhyme, which is what most of us have trouble with. Always remember that you dont always have to rhyme. I well written non-rhyming poem is always better than a rhyming poem if it gets the point across better.
Though you dont have much to do, just change some lines so that you're not cutting into the rhythm of the poem.
Ok ^^ thank you for letting me know
Amazing set by Ezza Obsuna ^^
The days fly by and the feelings remain
So far away and causing us pain
That's okay we'll make it through
Soon we'll get to say "I love you" ♥
Thank you for commenting I'll try to do better next time. I'm working on a new poem as of right now so i'll be posting it when I get home ^^
Amazing set by Ezza Obsuna ^^
The days fly by and the feelings remain
So far away and causing us pain
That's okay we'll make it through
Soon we'll get to say "I love you" ♥
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)
Bookmarks