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Thread: Your smile

  1. #1
    Three Nil Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default Your smile

    hello again this is also another first poem i ever thought of here is "your smile"

    Your smile is beautiful
    Your smile is graceful
    Your smile makes my smile expand even greater
    Your smile is sly but not like a fox
    More like a sunday with cherries on top
    Your smile is the reason my heart never stops


    thank you for reading
    Last edited by Aizen-sama; 10-31-2009 at 11:23 AM.

    "Dark light come shine in her lost heart tonight
    And blind all fears that haunt her with your smile
    Dark light"-HIM

  2. #2
    Senior Member Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall has a reputation beyond repute Annie Hall's Avatar
    Gil
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    That's really cute ^-^

    However, I think it would be better without the last "Your Smile" Just because that makes me think it would continue but it doesn't.



  3. #3
    Three Nil Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama's Avatar
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    thank you and your it does seem better

    "Dark light come shine in her lost heart tonight
    And blind all fears that haunt her with your smile
    Dark light"-HIM

  4. #4
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    Considering its your first , i think i would like to concentrate more on the thoughts behind the poem. Its cute to think about that one smile which makes us feel greater.

    Keep practicing and put your thoughts in words , you can do it.
    Tell me if you need any help.

    ~~~~x♥
    wish me luck for furture guys!!!!
    Thanks for everything!!!
    ^___^

  5. #5
    Three Nil Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama's Avatar
    Gil
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    tahnks so much .savageXDD it means alot coming from you

    "Dark light come shine in her lost heart tonight
    And blind all fears that haunt her with your smile
    Dark light"-HIM

  6. #6
    What a feeling in my soul Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell has a reputation beyond repute Artcell's Avatar
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    Aww..cute poem.And I agree with .Savage.Well keep it up!You'll be a good poet!
    Lovely set made by the awesome Arxia!
    Thanks so much girl!
    ♥♥♥

  7. #7
    Three Nil Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama has a reputation beyond repute Aizen-sama's Avatar
    Gil
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    thanks .elmer since your a new friend

    "Dark light come shine in her lost heart tonight
    And blind all fears that haunt her with your smile
    Dark light"-HIM

  8. #8
    Heart Cold As Ice ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR has a reputation beyond repute ELR's Avatar
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    Awe, sentamental. I agree with them about that part and one word could be changed but it still works, I'll let you try to figure it out on your own. Please keep writing. ^_^ My friend.
    I am no more a rose than I am its thorns.
    No more a gentle breeze than I am the hailing storm.
    I am no more hated than I am loved.
    And I am no more heartfilled than I am heartless.
    This is who I am.
    ~ELR

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