Etiquette...

[Cobra Commander]

"and Protocol. I have no need for a protocol droid." - Uncle Owen

TL;DR at the bottom

So...etiquette. Manners, even. Do you have any? Do I? [no]
Is society in general just declining? [darned teenagers]

I've seen people my age fail to hold doors open for old ladies, or people with their hands full coming behind them. I've seen guys let the door slam in their girlfriend's face. And I guess using coarse language in a restaurant in front of mom, grandma, and the children is cool, as is leaving a large mess strewn everywhere when you leave. Or talking about "what you'd do" to that cute girl over there who can hear you because you're loud like a retard and is either really angry or really embarrassed right now is cool too. Please die.

So, I'm at the gym today. Gym courtesy involves leaving others alone, and wiping down machines when you're done, and cleaning up after yourself in the locker room. I disapprove of people wandering around naked for no reason in the locker room, but I'm not the dong police, so whatever.

And when there's a really big lady in the pool, wearing as modest a swimsuit as possible, doing a water aerobics class you don't freaking make fun of her and stare through the window. And girls, if you don't want me to check out your behind, then don't wear shorts that don't cover your cheeks.

I think this reflects a larger problem in our society. Teachers and parents fail to teach children proper standards of behavior. There's a lot of stuff I see kids do today that I would have been slapped silly for doing when I was little. My parents spanked me when I was bad. I didn't grow up to be a serial killer.

We, as a whole, lack discipline and respect for others. For some reason the system of social disapproval and peer pressure that once worked on people no longer works. It's almost like it's cool to be a problem, cool to act like a douche, cool to make messes and walk away...

And I suppose if no one teaches you any better, it's not your fault when someone calls you on your BS. But it really is still your fault.

TL;DR = Lazy. So...are you polite to people? Do you clean up after yourself? What about helping old ladies by holding doors or picking up heavy things for them?

[Teddy2116]

I do agree with you about the kids/teenagers now a days (don't take this the wrong way) not having any manners/etiquette. I mean from what I seen they're pretty much are taught to care about themselves and does that are close to them. Kinda bad way at going in life but that's how it is.

[Cobra Commander]

Yeah, but you're 21 an I'm 25, and I see this problem in people in their 30's. It's just messed up how rude or uncaring people can be toward others. I might not go out of my way for someone, but if I'm walking by and see they need a hand with the door, or have dropped something and their hands are full...I'll help.

I aired up some lady's tire the other day because the ground was muddy and she was wearing her sunday church clothes and I don't care about my jeans.

[*Tsuki*]

I agree.
Yes, I try to be polite.
I say excuse me, and thank you.
When I bump into someone, I apologize.
I hold doors open for people, even if they aren`t old women. I help people hold stuff when their hands are full, and say you`re welcome.
But, sadly, people aren`t very thankful. While waiting for a ride, my friend and I were holding open the doors for people while we were at Feed my Starving Children. Anyway, a group of about 30 people, mostly kids, walk in. We`re holding open the doors for them, and out of all those people, three say thank you. It was quite shocking, and after they were through, my friend also noticed how little courtesy was shown. People are rude and mean, and kids scream in the middle of the store when they`re 10 and up. It`s quite sad, indeed.

Edit: The worst problem I see is people constantly interupting each other.

[Teddy2116]

Well that's how the world is sometimes if not most. Only thing that is important is what you can get or what you want people to get for you, sadly.

[Luluko]

I've been thinking about this since I came back from the hotel I was staying. They had this "since my parents paid, I can do whatever I want and you have to listen" attitude that made my blood boil. They disrespected the members of that staff just because they paid for it and it's their duty to endure their temper tantrums. The sad part was that their parents knew pretty much everything they did, and yet chose to remain oblivious of their behavior.

[Forgotten Show]

I'm courteous in action to make up for my razor tongue and uncontrollable sarcasm. It's good enough that parents of dates love me, dates know better.

If you view etiquette as social norms and rules, then you'll find that throughout time cultures have always found their base social norms and rules changing. It takes time, and is always resisted, but happens nonetheless. It just so happens that this particular set of expectations and rules was one you liked, and the new one ya don't like so much. Just don't get caught up in thinking that there are no such expectations or rules today... they're just different than they were.

Do you hold the door for someone because it's polite, or because it's a nice thing to do? There's a difference between etiquette and simple human decency (there's an arcane term), AKA, kindness.


Bad Memory

[LittleGirl]

I'm always very polite. I think I have pretty good manners. I hold doors open, help elderly like if I'm on the city bus and there's no other available seat, I don't swear loudly in public, and at the gym I always wipe down the machine. I can only think of the example you mentioned, but yes I have manners. I even have this book on Etiquette. I love it.

[Megamind's Minion]

it does not matter if one is old or young...
everyone has a duty to be respectful of others..
coz everbody else deserved to be respected and be helped even if we do not know them or we have no idea what kind of people they are...

in this generation where children are allowed or let alone by their parents to do everything they want..
they take for granted other people's position in society..
they think that they are superior of others especially if they are in position..
they tend to look down on others...
the same is true with adults..

which is not right..
because this shows how much you respect yourself..

it is not a question of etiquette or upbringing...
its a question of how much you respect others...

respecting others is respecting oneself...
if you consider other people as trash..
aren't you a little bit too harsh on yourself?!!!

[RaShayRitto]

i dont think this is a problem with "todays kids" or anything. There are polite people and there are idiots. its always been that way

its one of those things natural selection cant fix

[3pleT]

i dont think this is a problem with "todays kids" or anything. There are polite people and there are idiots. its always been that way

its one of those things natural selection cant fix

Maybe natural selection can't, but we can. The problem is, when you refuse to help someone who obviously needs your help, it will all be forgiven and forgotten very soon. What you did is definitely a faux pas, but nobody will mention it as such or you as selfish, lazy or whatever, and even if they do, they will probably do it behind your back. Nowadays, people will think lowly of you for burping in public, eating with your hands in a restaurant or something that makes even less sense, and more importantly, they will show it. And look how many people actually do those things now. If most of us only agreed to do the same thing to people who litter or refuse to help or do something else that actually matters, they will change their mind very soon.

[Shin Natsume]

Oh please don't limit this to the new "young generation" which I guess I wouldn't be a part of. This type of behavior is appearant in people of all ages. I happen to actually have good etiquette AND netiguette -at least to my knowledge-. I have younger siblings and some choose the rebellious road while others take the life of being compliant to what ever rules are put in front of them. Maybe peoples standards of "good" are'nt what you think they should be. I mean heck, whats right to me may not be relatively right to you. Like opening a door you say. People have arms and are capable. -_- I've seen older people act totally silly over nothing too, believe me. I work in a freaking grocery store and I see enough clowns to last enough time. Rude people -especially around the beginning of the month with food stamps people- and elder people who I'm suprised didn't have a stroke from the way they act O_o. Thats just the society we live in and you my friend just have to accept it.

[Velvet_Nightmare]

I was one of those kids that got manners pounded into them at an early age, so things like that come natural to me. I always hold doors open, say excuse me when needed, although I do have trouble saying "yes/no mam/sir" to elders or authority figures.

[Eris]

The funny part is that this is not new. It is in fact very old. There is a quote, unfortunately I can't find it for the life of me, of a 16th (or was it 15th) century monk complaining about just the same things. Young people are lazy, they don't respect their elders, they don't carry on traditions and preserve morals, etc.

[Kishiro]

The funny part is that this is not new. It is in fact very old. There is a quote, unfortunately I can't find it for the life of me, of a 16th (or was it 15th) century monk complaining about just the same things. Young people are lazy, they don't respect their elders, they don't carry on traditions and preserve morals, etc.

In short, we are complained about as youths, and when we are no longer in that category, we will complain about the new youths.

And so the circle is complete.

[Manhattan_Project_2000]

The funny part is that this is not new. It is in fact very old. There is a quote, unfortunately I can't find it for the life of me, of a 16th (or was it 15th) century monk complaining about just the same things. Young people are lazy, they don't respect their elders, they don't carry on traditions and preserve morals, etc.

Yeah, it's one of those things that every generation thinks is a new phenomenon, because every generation is conceded, forgetful, and doesn't actually pay attention to history.

[DOOM!]

Those... damn... KIDS!

[Flah Blah]

^ Approve.

But yeah. I was brought up in a household where manners and discipline are very big but with a generation seriously lacking in this respect. So whenever I go out of my way just to hold a door for someone and behave with as much ettiquette and good manners as possible whenever I go out...it's quite often enough mistaken for the pretentious snob factor. What's up with that? So being polite is actually rude now?

[Teddy2116]

^ Approve.

But yeah. I was brought up in a household where manners and discipline are very big but with a generation seriously lacking in this respect. So whenever I go out of my way just to hold a door for someone and behave with as much ettiquette and good manners as possible whenever I go out...it's quite often enough mistaken for the pretentious snob factor. What's up with that? So being polite is actually rude now?

No its just that some people aren't use to other doing polite things for them.

[Señor Nobody]

Those... damn... KIDS!

A statement repeated by every generation.

Well, because I feared getting a beating as a kid, I now have perfect manners.

I hold the door open for people even if it is inconvenient for me, I respond to everyone (IRL) as either sir or madam, and I only laugh at people in my head or when I am in a private place.

[Ryuuzaki HD]

Damn punk kid's need to stay off my lawn and get some manners, when I was that age we respected our elder's.

[RexCars]

Agreed. Our connected generation is becoming more and more disconnected from what older generations considered basic propriety.

[Eris]

Agreed. Our connected generation is becoming more and more disconnected from what older generations considered basic propriety.

This is plain wrong. The current older generations invented youth culture. They invented rock music, going steady, wearing a leather jacket and driving around on a motorcycle instead of doing your homework. All of this was appalling to their parents and grandparents. Of course, they did the Charleston and wore pants (the women that is) when they were young, which was appalling to their parents and grandparents.

I urge you to watch some old Marlon Brando and James Dean movies (The Wild One, Rebel Without a Cause, etc.)

Nothing is new under the sun.

[.Tatty.]

well today's Jeremy Kyle generation are only interested in procrastinating, smoking pot and fornication!


To be honest i dont see how its a pain or a bother to smile at someone in the street or hold a door for a lady (or a guy), say please and thankyou.

It lazyness and general twattyness!

[Flah Blah]

No its just that some people aren't use to other doing polite things for them.

Oh no, I'm quite aware of that. It was just ranting on my part.

However, as previously stated...such antics are nothing new at all. Generations upon generations have had their forms of rebellion. You may want to watch The Lost Boys while you're looking up Eris' suggestions.

 

Good for the lolz and how you shouldn't rebel 'cause you'll end up a wampire.