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Thread: 翻訳文(英→日)直して下さい。

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    Gil
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    Default 翻訳文(英→日)直して下さい。

    原文
    How is your pocket condition?
    -Be a wise & economical consumer.

    In the morning, Sakamoto goes to campus by bus. - 100yen
    After his class, he has lunch. - 400yen
    He has free time after lunch, so he goes to the billiard hall or goes to a cafe with his girlfriend. - 1,400yen
    At night, he phones his girlfriend, chatting for almost an hour. - About 720yen
    Sometimes he drinks with his friends is the evening - 1,000yen

    This is how much Sakamoto normally spends a day. He has a part time job and receives some pocket money from his parents, but he finds himself almost running out of money at the end of a month.
    "Where's my money gone?" Sakamoto thinks, looking into his empty wallet.
    Is your case similar to Sakamoto's?Many parts of our activites - buying books, electronic machines, and clothes, or going somewhere, or meeting people- are related to consumption. By spending money or time, we can satisfy our wants. By purchasing goods, we can express who we are to others. In a certain view, consumption can be a way of existerne. The sentence, "I spend therefore I am" is an example to show how consumption is a way of existence. The sentence, which is a transformation the phrase Rene Descartes said - "I think therefore I am" - is used is books, on the internet, etc.
    Hence, how to spend money well is as important as how to save money.

    翻訳文
    あなたの金入れは大丈夫ですか。
    朝は坂本がバスに乗って学校(キャンパス)に行きます。-100円
    授業の後は昼飯を食べます。-400円
    昼の後は閑があるから恋人と一緒にポケットボールクラブ、またはカフェに行きます。-1,400円
    夜は恋人へ電話がかかって30分以上語り明かします。-約720円
    時々には晩に友たちと一緒に酒を飲みます。-1000円
    これが坂本がかけたお金の額です。バイトして父母さんからお金をもらっても月末によく金がない事を目覚めま す。
    「俺のお金はどこ?」坂本さんがそう思って、ただ彼の空っぽの財布を見つめるだけ。。
    貴方の場合も坂本と同じですか。俺らの色々な生活-本、電子製品,着物を買い、または何処かへ行き、人々を会い、全て消費と関連があります。
    お金か時間を使いながら自分のほしさを充足出来ます。
    物品を買いながら他の人々で自分を表現出来ます。
    どんな観点には存在の理由(わけ)もなれます。「我は消費する、だから我は存在する。」と言う字(ことば) は消費が存在する訳を見せます。
    (この字は本、インターネットなどによく使われるデカルトの名言の変(パロディ)です。
    ともかくお金の使いも貯蓄のほど大切な事です。

    原文
    How are your monthly Expense?
    XXXX research center researched XXXX universities' average monthry expenses through serveying 200 students.
    They were asked where they spent money most. In both genders, the expense of food took up the largest part of their spending on average.
    However, in the case of female students, the average figures show that the percentage of money spent buying clothes took the second largest part. On the other hand, in the case of male students, the expense of entertainment shows the second highest percentage among the six categories.
    The survey shows average monthly expenditures of male and female student at XXXX university. The percentage of students spending money under 30,000yen per month was greatest, showing a little more than 50%. In the arnge from 30,000yen to 40,000yen, female students' figures appear at 32%, which is about seven percent more than male students.
    According to the research daya, it appears that most students take out money from their purse whenever they need, rather than plan how much money and where they will spend before taking an action.

    翻訳文
    貴方の月間消費額はどのくらい?
    ***研究(リサーチ)センターが***大学生200名の1ヶ月間の消費額を調査しました。
    何でお金を一番使うかが主要質問でした。男女全て食べ物で平均的に一番お金を使いました。
    しかし、女学生の場合は着物で消費するのが2位でした。
    では男学生の場合はエンタテインメントで消費する事が6つのカテゴリの2位でした。
    次の調査は***大学の男女学生の平均消費量を見せます。
    半以上の学生は1ヶ月間3万円を使います。男学生より7%高い32%の女学生は3万円~4万円 を使います。
    調査結果について、どのぐらい、そしてどこにお金を使うかを消費の前に計画するより、お金が必要な時にすぐ 金入れからお金を引く方と云えます。

  2. #2
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    Gil
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    Default

    Here's my little suggestions.

    "pocket condition" -> ふところ具合 (HUTOKORO-GUAI)
    HUTOKORO is a part of kimono, around chest,
    and GUAI means "condition". Since people used to keep their wallets
    inside HUTOKORO, now HUTOKORO refers to "pocket money".

    "the billiard hall" -> ビリヤードホール

    人々を会い -> 人々と会い or 人々に会い

    buying ... and clothes -> 服を買う
    着物 or Kimono means traditional clothes.
    Clothes in general is 服.

    "male and female student" -> 男子学生と女子学生
    女学生 is a completely correct translation but a sort of shopworn words.
    (My grandmother loves to talk like this : When I was a 女学生, ...)
    Usually, the word 女子学生 is used.


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