AnimeGalleries [dot] NetAnimeWallpapers [dot] ComAnimeLyrics [dot] ComAnimePedia [dot] ComAnimeGlobe [dot] Com

User Tag List

+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: Perfect

  1. #1
    Rising Falcon! Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody's Avatar
    Gil
    43,553.71
    Gender
    My Mood
    Amused
    Gifts Xmas Tree Present Gurren Kamina Glasses
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    12-21-2012 09:51 PM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    At your base since it belongs to me
    Age
    25
    Threads
    46
    Posts
    2,202
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    3452
    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: ErraticKyosuke

    Default Perfect

    Well, since I dare to criticize other's poems I might as well post an old one of mine. Any rhyming is a coincidence.

    I wrote this years ago so no need to worry. My smiles are 100% now!

    ___________
    The truth is so overwhelming
    I thought if I never wrote out my feelings
    They could never become real
    I figured if I couldn’t give those feelings names
    That they could not exist

    I was wrong

    You’re smiling at me again
    While I’m pretending that I’m alright
    The smile I’m faking
    Is like a dagger to my soul

    Imprisoned by boredom that I can’t escape
    Who is it that suffers while the world is asleep
    Who is it who cries while humanity is full of good cheer
    These feelings of despair grow intensely stronger

    I’m fighting the urge to scream again
    So I suppress these desperate feelings within myself
    Outside the sun is shining brightly
    I’m stealing all its rays for my smile

    This false brilliance makes you blind
    To the misery I keep inside of me
    You could never understand this pain

    You are simply too perfect to suffer in this way
    _____________
    My assessment: Cliche!
    Emo-tastic!
    Depressing!
    Unclear!
    My grade: D-!
    Last edited by Seņor Nobody; 04-30-2009 at 12:52 AM.
    I now know what hell sounds like; I recommend a tactical nuclear strike on my position. Tell my family I love them.

  2. #2
    Visage Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma has a reputation beyond repute Necro'lic Enigma's Avatar
    Gil
    36,320.00
    Gender
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    12-28-2009 05:11 PM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    In a house made of 10 years game xx
    Age
    25
    Threads
    16
    Posts
    1,815
    Rep Power
    0

    Default

    Your simply too perfect to suffer in this way , now thats some line to look at.

    I think your poem had some awareness for me , i was reading really closely each and every line. Its a well done , not bad at all.
    And keep posting your other peoms which you write , will be happy to read from you.
    wish me luck for furture guys!!!!
    Thanks for everything!!!
    ^___^

  3. #3
    Senior Member Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55 has a reputation beyond repute Shinigami_55's Avatar
    Gil
    6,967.89
    Gender
    My Mood
    Chatty
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    03-02-2011 06:15 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Loliworld
    Age
    21
    Threads
    18
    Posts
    349
    Rep Power
    161

    Default

    i'm not a big poetry fan bt this is quit good!
    keep up whit it!!

  4. #4
    Rising Falcon! Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody's Avatar
    Gil
    43,553.71
    Gender
    My Mood
    Amused
    Gifts Xmas Tree Present Gurren Kamina Glasses
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    12-21-2012 09:51 PM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    At your base since it belongs to me
    Age
    25
    Threads
    46
    Posts
    2,202
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    3452
    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: ErraticKyosuke

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Madness View Post
    Your simply too perfect to suffer in this way , now thats some line to look at.

    I think your poem had some awareness for me , i was reading really closely each and every line. Its a well done , not bad at all.
    And keep posting your other peoms which you write , will be happy to read from you.
    Really? I though that was one of my more cliche lines. I'm glad you guys like it though, I'll go find my old poems and post them if I can find them.
    I now know what hell sounds like; I recommend a tactical nuclear strike on my position. Tell my family I love them.

  5. #5
    Senior Member fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen's Avatar
    Gil
    2,500.00
    Gender
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    05-05-2009 03:41 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    in the world of dreams... =]
    Age
    19
    Threads
    1
    Posts
    125
    Rep Power
    187

    Default

    hey~! ^^
    nice poem.. i like the 2nd stanza.. don't know why..
    i kept reading it over and over again.. hehe..
    anyway, good job! hope to read more from you..
    ...really cool sig made by...Nespa... =]

  6. #6
    AF's Annoying Weeaboo Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner has a reputation beyond repute Yoko Littner's Avatar
    Gil
    87,997.45
    Gender
    Gifts Ice Cream Watermelon Watermelon
    Mentioned
    289 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    09-29-2014 12:22 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    North Reading Massachusetts
    Age
    21
    Threads
    439
    Posts
    8,470
    Blog Entries
    99
    Rep Power
    8193
    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: NanoEdge EX

    Default

    I also seemed to like it.

    Something I noticed was that each stanza seemed to get better as they went along which is what I like about it. You should really post some more soon.
    Check out Anime Globe for the latest in anime reviews and anime news!


    ~Me, when my waifu confessed her love to me~

  7. #7
    Captain No Pants Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki. has a reputation beyond repute Tsuki.'s Avatar
    Gil
    501.36
    Gender
    Gifts Cowboy Hat Dr Who Tardis Dr Who SonicScrewdriver
    Mentioned
    89 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    05-17-2014 11:23 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Age
    19
    Threads
    115
    Posts
    3,754
    Blog Entries
    66
    Rep Power
    4300

    Default

    o.o sounds kinda like some of the poems I posted a while back.
    (though I never actually felt that way, I have a good imagination)
    anyway, I like it. ^^
    much better than a D- in my opinion, and I agree with everyone else, keep posting! =)

    oh, right, about the poem. . .
    I could really feel the emotions flowing throughout the poem,
    and could really understand it.


  8. #8
    Trojan.FlyStudio.I i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage has a reputation beyond repute i_say_sabotage's Avatar
    Gil
    10,915.47
    Gender
    My Mood
    Aggressive
    Gifts Prinny Favorite
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    03-10-2012 03:53 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    White Horse Tavern
    Threads
    11
    Posts
    550
    Rep Power
    241

    Default

    Wow... this sounds a bit like one I've written before (though the feelings weren't as explosive hehe) I could share it, but I'm not so sure if I can post a poem in reply to a poem thread so I'll post it if i have the greenlight :P

    But if this is over a year ago, why not pick up the pen and write again? I'm positive you'd come up with something great! ^_^

    btw... D- is being too hard on yourself you know! haha


    It is hard to say there is a reason for being anywhere
    Even if you retrace your steps

  9. #9
    Rising Falcon! Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody has a reputation beyond repute Seņor Nobody's Avatar
    Gil
    43,553.71
    Gender
    My Mood
    Amused
    Gifts Xmas Tree Present Gurren Kamina Glasses
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    12-21-2012 09:51 PM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    At your base since it belongs to me
    Age
    25
    Threads
    46
    Posts
    2,202
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    3452
    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: ErraticKyosuke

    Default

    You have the green light.

    I don't see why people like it, it really depresses me. Also, I wrote this about...7 years ago. I was emo when I was a teen...

    *Sigh*
    I now know what hell sounds like; I recommend a tactical nuclear strike on my position. Tell my family I love them.

  10. #10
    Simple Truth CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce has a reputation beyond repute CrystalAce's Avatar
    Gil
    5,158.46
    Gender
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    12-04-2010 02:07 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Level 1 Station
    Age
    25
    Threads
    32
    Posts
    729
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    545

    Default

    Considering the fact that you wrote this poem 7 years ago, I'd say it's a pretty decent poem.

    So, how do you want me to comment then? ... considering you as 7 years younger from now or considering you as an adult right now... ah the dilemma it has is unquestionable ...

    Anyway, I don't rate poems as I respect all works of art & creativity, so I'll just say it's a good poem.

    Nice job to you who was 7 years younger from now !
    Last edited by CrystalAce; 05-06-2009 at 05:45 AM.
    "To do is to be" - Descartes, "To be is to do" - Voltaire, "Do be do be do" - Sinatra.

    NOTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY

+ Reply to Thread

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

     

Similar Threads

  1. Timesplitters Future Perfect
    By Zanethose in forum Video Games
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 12-21-2005, 03:10 PM
  2. Your Favorite Music Lyrics
    By Evil Ves Ves in forum J-pop/rock (and other music)
    Replies: 128
    Last Post: 06-08-2005, 12:16 PM
  3. Perfect Blue
    By The Wing Man in forum General Anime & Manga
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 05-04-2005, 01:43 PM
  4. Timesplitters: Future Perfect
    By Tyr in forum Video Games
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-08-2005, 06:21 PM
  5. A Perfect Circle
    By Ollie in forum J-pop/rock (and other music)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 12-27-2004, 09:56 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts