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On this day of days, most epic and prideful, you were born 15 whole American years ago!
Through the odds and by doing the impossible, you beat out hundreds of thousands of siblings in the great sperm race for the coveted egg.
Probably via hax.
Regardless! You won!
So remember, whenever someone picks on you or calls you weak or small.
Just remind them that you beat out a few hundred thousand other wimps.
And the grand prize was not dying!
Well, I agree with you on the Simpsons. That's the show you watch when you don't have cable or a satellite dish or you just don't have anything better to do. I can't believe that show is still running, unbelievable! Oh yeah, I'm not a fan of reality shows, or any other show on the big networks.
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