AnimeGalleries [dot] NetAnimeWallpapers [dot] ComAnimeLyrics [dot] ComAnimePedia [dot] ComAnimeGlobe [dot] Com


User Tag List

+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Star Locket Melody

  1. #1
    Junior Member Chiloves1 is on a distinguished road Chiloves1's Avatar
    Gil
    200.00
    Gender
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    01-04-2009 07:36 PM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    British Columbia, Canada
    Threads
    3
    Posts
    10
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Star Locket Melody

    Star Locket Melody

    A piano keeps playing softly in my head
    A hauntingly familiar tune from an old cartoon
    A sad song of heartbreak and despair
    Playing for the crying girl odango hair
    Heart was broken by the one she holds true
    I know how that feels, it happened to me too
    And I cried hard, pouring out my heart
    Wondering why, how, confused and in pain
    And just like her there are things unexplained
    We laugh and smile, things seem to be the same
    But few can see past our masks and feel the pain
    She has hope and dreams of the future
    Mine has become false and nightmarish
    In the end her future becomes a happy tale
    I'm still wondering what mine will entail
    A bleak wasteland ruled by the Dark Moon
    Or a peaceful harmony of love and Ginzuishou
    Only fate knows the truth
    And so I shall see
    What destiny awaits and what I draw to me

  2. #2
    Nanobyte's minion SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD's Avatar
    Gil
    87,749.27
    Gender
    My Mood
    Sleepy
    Gifts Luna Cake Lie Soras Keyblade
    Mentioned
    82 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    10-02-2015 01:37 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    In your dreams. =0
    Threads
    148
    Posts
    5,965
    Blog Entries
    118
    Rep Power
    6149
    Gamer IDs

    Wii Code: 1596-5790-7816-3407

    Default

    This poem was enjoyable. It did have a good rhythm and flow. I just think that you should've focused more on meaning. It's good that you're trying to create some imagery, but it needs to relate to your central theme. Might I suggest you divide it into manageable stanzas as well.
    If Minecraft had a Japanese intro.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature...&v=H5qFZjuKet4

    |Set made by Neukifly|

    Super Saiyan Dango


  3. #3
    Senior Member fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen has a reputation beyond repute fyereen's Avatar
    Gil
    2,500.00
    Gender
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Latest Post
    05-05-2009 03:41 AM
    User Info Thanks / Tagging Info Gifts / Achievements / Awards vBActivity Stats
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    in the world of dreams... =]
    Age
    20
    Threads
    1
    Posts
    125
    Rep Power
    189

    Default

    i think you should divide it into stanzas...
    it will make it easier to read...
    its a great poem.. good job!
    i hope you'll continue making nice poems... =]
    ...really cool sig made by...Nespa... =]

+ Reply to Thread

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

     

Similar Threads

  1. Star Ocean: Till the End of Time ending *warning spoiler*
    By Janus Silverlock in forum Video Games
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 08-19-2005, 01:53 PM
  2. Star ocean fan anyone
    By lillaosazn in forum Video Games
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-03-2005, 11:18 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts