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Thread: When I Cut

  1. #1
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    Gil
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    Default When I Cut

    This is really old. I found it. Thought I'd share.




    I carved a cross into my arm the other day,
    I tried to show you, but you just looked away.
    Iím trying to show you I need help,
    But you just donít understand how I felt.

    When I cut,
    Itís to escape.

    Just look into my face,
    The pain isnít hard to misplace.
    Donít you see what you do to me?
    You make me so blind, that I canít see.

    When I cut,
    Itís to mutilate.

    I fainted the other day,
    I hit the wall, and there I lay.
    Lack of Iron was the cause,
    But itís not the reason my handís wrapped in gauze.

    When I cut,
    Itís to violate.

    I may have problems, but so do you,
    I forgave your problems, and you did too.
    Oh and when we kissed,
    I was so ignorant, it was bliss.

    When I cut,
    Itís for simplicity.

    We felt so right,
    On that Saturday night
    Like nothing else mattered.

    When I cut,
    Itís to forget.

    And when I got home,
    It fell apart.
    You didnít care that you had,
    Stolen my heart.

    When I cut,
    Itís to remember.

    The days of US seem so far away,
    But it seems like it was just yesterday.

    When I cut,
    Itís to bleed.
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  2. #2
    Senior Member godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13 has a reputation beyond repute godsofdeathluvapples13's Avatar
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    that was really good. i had a guy that made me feel that way. and ur right. they dont care. they just look the other way. but its all good now. cuz hes gone!!
    Well....... School started so i wont be on as much ='(. I still love you all and will be on more frequently when summer comes. I will miss you all and still continue to right my fan fic and look for my poem book. Until June.....

    Love Godsofdeathluvapples13.

    I love you namiko! I'll see you in school!

  3. #3
    Member The Ultimate One K Dash is infamous around these parts The Ultimate One K Dash is infamous around these parts The Ultimate One K Dash is infamous around these parts The Ultimate One K Dash's Avatar
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    0_o'..* coughes *..ya when i cut its usually to get attention from ppl online. Or you know sometimes, u know when im at school, when im bored in class i cut paper. And like when my hair is out of controle, i normally cut that 2.

  4. #4
    Ellxeeva's Minion SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD has a reputation beyond repute SigmaSD's Avatar
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    Default

    Your poem is good, but I really hope you don't cut yourself anymore. It's really unhealthy.

    What I liked about your poem was its style. You separated each stanza with reasons for your behavior. Your words also made it seem like I was cutting myself, so I could feel the pain emminating from your poem. It had a good flow and structure. Nice Job.

    PS- Please don't cut yourself.
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  5. #5
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    Default

    I carved a cross into my arm the other day,
    I tried to show you, but you just looked away.
    Iím trying to show you I need help,
    But you just donít understand how I felt.

    When I cut,
    Itís to escape.

    Just look into my face,
    The pain isnít hard to misplace.
    Donít you see what you do to me?
    You make me so blind, that I canít see.

    That was my favourite part. I so understand what your saying. I've experienced that before. Anyways this poem was really good. I liked it.

  6. #6
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SigmaSD View Post
    Your poem is good, but I really hope you don't cut yourself anymore. It's really unhealthy.

    What I liked about your poem was its style. You separated each stanza with reasons for your behavior. Your words also made it seem like I was cutting myself, so I could feel the pain emminating from your poem. It had a good flow and structure. Nice Job.

    PS- Please don't cut yourself.
    No, I don't. I haven't in a really, really long time. I wrote that when I was maybe 16-17? I'm turning 24 in december.

    I always thought that the way I formatted my poems made them unique/worked really well. I'm glad to see that someone else feels that way too. I'll have to dig into my treasure trove and post more of my old stuff.
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  7. #7
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    Default

    Whoever left me bad rep for this poem, citing that I'm a bad influence for posting this on a site filled with kids....

    HELLO. I used to MODERATE here. This is the very LEAST of what I would allow. Please do not negative rep me just because I posted ONE negative poem. There are hundreds of poems on this website alone about cutting themselves, commiting suicide or killing other people. Please do not negative rep me over something so stupid. At least leave your name if you're going to try to cause a flame war, idiot.
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  8. #8
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    Default

    this poem is very good

  9. #9
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    i very much liked it. i know what its like to cut, but i havnt in about 9 months...

    You're like an angel from a picture book...

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Princess Ai View Post
    Whoever left me bad rep for this poem, citing that I'm a bad influence for posting this on a site filled with kids....

    HELLO. I used to MODERATE here. This is the very LEAST of what I would allow. Please do not negative rep me just because I posted ONE negative poem. There are hundreds of poems on this website alone about cutting themselves, commiting suicide or killing other people. Please do not negative rep me over something so stupid. At least leave your name if you're going to try to cause a flame war, idiot.
    I agree with you about this.

    Anyways, it was a good poem. I liked every stanza in it, and the flow was right on the money. Write more poems when you get the chance.

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  11. #11
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    This poem is special, it shows you how you had felt during those times, emotions were spaced out, puttin small detials that make others feel what you had felt. I liked it, and I'm willing to admit I cut myself before, but I didn't want attention, and I didn't want peoples concern. I cut myself to pull myself together so I could think properly, but I've been trying to find other ways of focusing myself when stress is around. Keep writing friend.
    I am no more a rose than I am its thorns.
    No more a gentle breeze than I am the hailing storm.
    I am no more hated than I am loved.
    And I am no more heartfilled than I am heartless.
    This is who I am.
    ~ELR

  12. #12
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    Excellent flow and word choice! 9.5/10

  13. #13
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    cutting is bad
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  14. #14
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    woah, i meant to answer this one a long time ago . . . anyway, I liked it, and I don't believe I can really say anymore about what I think because everyone else has said it already. ^.^


  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rein* View Post
    That was my favourite part. I so understand what your saying. I've experienced that before. Anyways this poem was really good. I liked it.
    That was also my favorite part. I've also done things like that before, it's completely understandable. I loved your poem, it was relatable and well written.
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  16. #16
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    i think it's a little to rhymy but you said you wrote it a while ago. if you still write i think it would be cool to be a little more abstract and use less rhyming words. that's just what i was taught in my college creative writting class. but i'm more into fiction writting that poetry. and also good for you for growing past cutting really isn't good for you and i'm glad to here that you sound like your better. congrats.

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