Author's Notes: Eris is the original creator of DPF. Check out his/her/whatever's site for newly found madness.

Somewhere on the fourteenth floor 'Medical'

The reaper slowly awakens. As his vision begins to clear he can see someones face grinning profusely.

"Geeze, I just woke up. Go be stupidly cheerful somewhere else."
"Oh come on. After what we did together?"
"You make it sound like we had sex."
"No, but we did take down an epicly huge monster which is just as cool. Besides I kinda have no choice."
"What do you mean?"
"They chained me to you after they couldn't figure out why I wasn't on the lists."
"And why are you grinning?"
"I've been holding it for like 7 hours not including time I was knocked out. If I keep my muscles tensed I won't have an accident."
"Oh...ew. Thanks for the info."
"I didn't want to wake you. But if you don't get up you'll have more than just info all around."
"Gah, fine. I'm up anyways."

As they head towards the only room properly fit for excrement disposal, janitor's closet, a group of reapers in what appears to suit colored robes approaches them.

"Pinky, you've been summoned to appear before the reaper council..."
He growls upon hearing the nickname.

"Why is he dancing?"
"I'm not dancing. I gotta go really bad."
"Why are you grinning then?"
"Nevermind him, let him suffer. Why am I being summoned?"
"Thats not cool, man. I'm prairie doggin it."
"It appears you've broken many rules and because of these violations you could be stripped of your ran... Nevermind. See you at noon."

Outside the Janitor's Closet

"Are you done yet?"
"You're making it hard for me to relax."
"It seems like you need to relax some too."
"Whats that supposed to mean?"
"I noticed how you tense up whenever someone calls you pinky and refers to your rank."
"Yeah so."
"I also noticed how you're the only one with an actual color. Everyone else is black, white, or gray. They're just jealous."
"I mean if I had to wear a bland colored robe for eternity I wouldn't be happy either. Then to see a low ranking person with something that makes him different besides the norm. Heh, life is really going to suck for this janitor."
"I mi..."
"Nevermind, I don't want to know."

They walk back towards their room as the janitor returns. Keith giggles as he hears sounds of the janitor gagging and choking.

"So how much trouble are we in?"
"You'll just tossed into some afterlife."
"Eh... I don't want to."
"How so?"
"I come from a multiculural family... I really don't want to end up split up in multiple places."
"It doesn't work like that."
"Besides I really don't want to choose. If I any choice at all. None really seem that good."
"I'm not like most humans. An eternity, even in the place I enjoy most will still just be an enternity. I like to diversify every so often."
"Oh please, what you just said makes you just like every other human."
"I kind of figured. But what'll happen to you?"
"If I'm lucky? Maybe janitor of the thirteenth floor."
"Thirteenth floor? I didn't see it on the elevator."
"Its like heaven's version of hell. If that makes any sense at all."
"Oh... I'm sorry for getting you into all this... I'll just shut up and let you enjoy this while you can."

The reaper is startled by his kindness and drifts back asleep.

Two hours before noon

A nurse walks into the room.

"Hi~ Just checking up on you two."
"Why hello, sexy voiced nurse."
"Don't let the suits know I told you but... everyones grateful for your actions. If that thing had escaped to another floor we would have had much more casulties. So if there is anything I can do to make your stay more pleasant let me know."
"Is there anything I can do for you miss sexy voice?"
"Ooo~ Naughty human."
"SKEITH! I'm sorry about him."
"He's kind of cute for someone still alive."
"Eh. Put up with him for a day and you would wish you could send him away with a word."

She giggles and walks out.


Keith falls onto the floor.

"Ow, how could block me like that?"
"Oh hush. She used to be a he and before then an it."
"How do you know?"
"We used to work together."
"Oh. That voice is such a tease then. I bet she has an adam's apple the size of a grapefruit. Probably a moustache too..."

Keith grosses himself out with his own thoughts.

"I bet you're right."
"Just out of curiosity did you tap that keg?"

The reaper smacks him.

"Ow... I'll take that as a yes."

The reaper smacks him with the scythe.