What is yours? Mine would be Greek/Roman mythology. And a favorite within that:
Hermes: Why are you depressed, Apollo?
Apollo: Because I'm so unlucky in love, Hermes.
Hermes: That's worth hurting over. But how are you unlucky?
Or do you just mean you're still hurting about the whole Daphne thing?
Apollo: No, I'm over that. But I'm grieving for a boyfriend - the Spartan, the son of Oibalos.
Hermes: Do tell. Is Hyacinthos dead?
Apollo: Very dead.
Hermes: Who did it, Apollo? I mean, who could be so heartless that he would kill that beautiful guy?
Apollo: I did it.
Hermes: Did you go crazy, Apollo?
Apollo: No! It was a bit of an unfortunate accident.
Hermes: How? I want to hear how it happened.
Apollo: He was learning to throw the discus and I was practicing with him. But that damned wind Zephyros - see, he had also been in love with the boy for a long time but the boy didn't pay attention to him, and he couldn't take being ignored. He did it. I threw my discus up, like I always do, but he blew down from Mount Taygetos, and moved it, and slammed it into the boy's skull so a lot of blood gushed from the wound and the boy died right then and there. Well, right away I shot an arrow at Zephryos and made him run off. I chased him all the way back to the mountain. As for the boy, I raised a tomb for him in Amyclai where the discus got him, and I made the earth send up a flower from his blood. The nicest and brightest flower of all, Hermes. It even has letters that spell out a lament for the deceased. Do you think my grief is unreasonable?
Hermes: Yes I do, Apollo. You knew that you'd chosen a boyfriend who was mortal. So don't be upset because he died.
- Lucian (ca. AD 120-ca. 185 wrote in Greek)
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