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Thread: Original Fiction: Project REanimation

  1. #1
    Taiga ga suki da. KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default Original Fiction: Project REanimation

    this is my first time posting here.^^' i made this fan fic for the recent animax awards and seeing as i didnt win, i thought id post it here.it's quite long so there's gonna be a fair amount of chapters in it since i dont want to overwhelm u wid too much text.hope u like it!^^

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    “Beauty is only skin deep – ugliness goes right to the bone. If you are one of the hundreds of individuals out there suffering from ugliness then Neko Nyan Nyan milk is the solution to your problems. That’s right. Just one glass of our revitalizing product will sweep your ugliness right out the window! Made from blending the milk of specially bred cows on the top of Mt. Fuji and 129.5 different secret chemicals, our product is scientifically proven to be able to remove ugliness! What are you waiting for? Call now! Our toll-free hot – “
    With a frustrated sigh sixteen year old Shuji Akamatsu turned off the only television set in his grandparent’s house. Standing up, he made his way to his bed, walking past a giant bean bag, his study table and a cabinet full of books, mangas and DVDs that bridged the gap between his ceiling and floor.
    “Who buys this stuff?” he asked incredulously just as the familiar dulcet tones of his neighbor Kentaro Totoro floated past his open window.
    “Hello? Hello? Is this Neko Nyan Nyan? It is? Hello?”
    “Figures,” muttered Shuji as he climbed onto his bed. With barely a glance at all the unfinished homework he had on his desk for school tomorrow he closed his eyes. Dreamland was just within in his grasp when the sound of shattering glass jolted him out his bed.
    The two years he had lived in his grandparent’s century old house after the untimely demise of his parents in a car crash had taught him to ignore strange noises that go bump in the night (or day for that matter). Wind rushing through the ceiling, old floor wood creaking as it contracted in the chilly night air and the occasional cries of a pair of mating cats; he was used to this. But the sound of breaking glass? That was new.
    That was worth investigating.
    With his heart beating loudly in his chest he slowly made his way out of his room, careful not to wake his grandparents. Although, he thought to himself, if the sound of a window breaking in the dead of the night wasn’t enough to wake them up then nothing else would.
    Treading lightly he carefully made his way down the stairs. Second by agonizingly slow second he inched his way downwards, afraid of alerting whatever it was that was down there.
    He was about to clear the last step when he heard something that, in the absolute stillness of the house, sounded like it was coming from an amplifier and the room on his left - the kitchen -was suddenly bathed in a warm yellow glow.
    Heart in his throat, it took him a couple of seconds to realize that it was only someone opening the refrigerator. Along with this realization came the thought that anyone who opened a refrigerator was bound to take some food from it. With this thought came another thought, he’s going to eat our food! And from this string of thoughts a little thought thought, if the other thoughts can think of a thought what about me? So this little thought among the sting of thoughts thought, I hope he eats grandma’s carrot soup. I could never stand the taste of it.
    This thought was promptly given a standing ovation by all the other thoughts.
    Grinning devilishly he said to himself, “I’ll just wait for this guy to finish grandma’s soup then I’ll make my move.”
    Slowly, he peeked into the kitchen, hoping to catch a glimpse of the intruder. However, the stark contrast between the light of the fridge and the darkness of the kitchen meant that only his outline could be seen. Judging from the little information he had, he deduced that the intruder wasn’t as tall as him, had hair that reached until his shoulders, was wearing a skirt, and was in fact a she, not a he. A very familiar she.
    “Kikko?” he called out at the hunched figure of his friend. “What on earth are you doing here?”
    Uttering a small scream in surprise that sent a fine shower of something flying out her mouth, she straightened up. In her right hand she held what seemed to be the remains of what was once a strawberry cheesecake and in her left, a bottle of milk. She was also carrying her school bag over her shoulder and was dressed in full school uniform.
    “Is that..?” Shuji asked as he moved closer to her. “Is that my strawberry cheesecake? I was saving that for the weekend!”
    Swallowing, she grinned sheepishly. “Sorry,” she said apologetically as she closed the door of the fridge. “It was either that or a bowl of carrot soup.”
    Man, he thought to himself, why didn’t she go for the carrot soup?
    “If it makes you feel better, it wasn’t really that good of a cake,” she said after she finished off the milk. “I’d say average, and I’m being really generous here.”
    “It was still cake,” he said sullenly, still upset at the loss of his cake. “What are you doing here anyway? It’s ten in the evening. Shouldn’t you be sleeping or something?”
    “Six minutes past ten actually,” she said with a grin.
    “Whatever,” he said. He looked at her for a minute without saying anything. His face then broke into a smile that would have been enough to power a small light bulb. “Six minutes and twenty-three seconds.” With a chuckle he sat down on the dining table.
    “So, what are you doing here in the middle of the night?” he asked her.
    “I wanted to show you my manga,” she said excitedly as she rummaged through her red school bag. “I finally finished it!”
    With a flourish, she took a dark blue sketchbook out of her bag. Waving it in front of his eyes she asked, “Want to read it?”
    Silently he took it from her hands. Opening it, he read. “Reanimation... Why the title?”
    “Read it and you’ll see.” she said in the same excited voice. “Come on, read it, read it!”
    “What if I don’t want to read it?”
    “You have to!” she pleaded, eyes wide. “I worked on that non-stop the moment I got home. I haven’t even changed out of my uniform yet!”
    “Is that really enough of a reason for me to read it?” he asked teasingly.
    “Oh come on!” she cried out. “I walked so far just to get it here-”
    “We’re practically neighbors. You just live three houses from here.”
    “And,” she continued. “It took me so long just to figure out how to get into your house. I even had to force open your kitchen window! The shattering scared me half to death.”
    With a look of surprise, Shuji remembered that the reason he got out of bed was because he heard something shatter. “You broke our window?! How could you break a window?!”
    “Actually, I wasn’t expecting it to break,” she explained. “I mean, who would’ve known its latch was connected to the glass right?”
    “I would!” he exclaimed as he inspected the window. It was broken alright. No way you could fix it. In his mind he could see volume number twelve of his favorite manga slowly slipping away. In fact, as he surveyed the extent of the damage, he could forget about getting twelve, thirteen, fourteen and the special collector’s edition anytime soon. “My grandparent’s are going to kill me! Well, actually I doubt they’d even get angry, but still, how am I going to explain this?! ‘Oh gee grandma, my friend just thought she’d drop by for a bit of strawberry cake. You know, the one I was saving for the weekend. Why didn’t she knock on the door like any normal person would? I don’t know grandma. What was that? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don’t know!”
    “Get a hold of yourself!” Kikko cried out, shaking his shoulders. “You’re ranting! Look, I’ll pay for the window okay? I’ll even explain things to your grandparents. How does that sound?”
    “I’m a - I’m a - a – Wha-?” he said slowly, confused.
    She sat him on a chair and placed the sketchbook he dropped on the floor back on his hands. “Just sit down and read my manga while I clean up here. I promise it’ll make you feel better.”
    Like a little child with an elder sister he obediently complied. “My name is Chizuru Haruko. I hate guys,” he read. “How is this supposed to make me feel better again?”
    “Keep on reading,” she said as she looked around for a broom to sweep up the broken shards of glass. “And do it silently.”
    With one final glance at the broken window, Shuji started reading.

    ************************
    and so ends chapter 1.^^ im open to any C nd C altho i have to tell u now that i cant reali do any huge changes to the story since its pretty much finished.so..look out for chapter 2!^^
    Last edited by KuroTan; 08-28-2007 at 12:43 AM. Reason: i killed myself putting all the indent tags in and it didnt even do anything.0.o

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  2. #2
    LUCKY DUCK Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus has a reputation beyond repute Capernicus's Avatar
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    lol Indent tags. Well, what everyone else just does is separate the paragraphs with a blank line. I know it's bad grammer, but it's about the only thing we can do.

    Well, this story is fairly well written. Can't say I completely followed your little thought spew, but it was entertaining. I think you could do with learning a little bit more about how English grammer, punctation, and mechanics, but other than that I think it's pretty good. You have a way with dialogue, which is a plus.


    Back, by popular demand! Now with new avy.


  3. #3
    Taiga ga suki da. KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan has a reputation beyond repute KuroTan's Avatar
    Gil
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    tnx!yea, ive got a few more years of studying to go before i can make reali good stuff but im getting there!i think...^^' ill keep ur advice in mind for my next projects.

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