Searching for you

[Howling Star]

Searching for you

Having no place to return to
Nothing to do
Crying was what I want so bad
Also being dead

A dark corner is just like me
It's so dark you won't notice nor see
In this prison of darkness
In this heart of sadness

Wheres my savior
My heroine
Will she come for sure ?
When I thought I had seen

I just where day dreaming or spacing out
And no matter if I scream loud no one comes
Searching in this forsaken town
Where everyone is a king and wears a crown

Searching for someone to talk to
That's all I do
And at night I return to my prison of darkness
To wait for a shoulder to cry on and to let it go my sadness it is

[Ichiro Matsuchani]

I can't tell you how sick I am of poems like this. So shallow...

Why not delve into something a bit more complicated, or dare say it, interesting? Especially since all of your poems have been about the same thing (Or something close to it.).

[seraphic_demon]

I can't tell you how sick I am of poems like this. So shallow...

Why not delve into something a bit more complicated, or dare say it, interesting? Especially since all of your poems have been about the same thing (Or something close to it.).

Well, the guy's sad, how can someone write something he doesn't feel? The good thing is he's writing, giving room to improvement and gaining style, the bad thing? His sadness is the only thing he could write at the moment.

[Ichiro Matsuchani]

Well, the guy's sad, how can someone write something he doesn't feel? The good thing is he's writing, giving room to improvement and gaining style, the bad thing? His sadness is the only thing he could write at the moment.

Poetry isn't always about emotion. Seems that you need to broaden the horizon.

[Howling Star]

Well, the guy's sad, how can someone write something he doesn't feel? The good thing is he's writing, giving room to improvement and gaining style, the bad thing? His sadness is the only thing he could write at the moment.

Well this guy's right I feel the same as him I write with emotion or I don't. I made love poems before when I was love. If I wanna make other I need to get that emotion first. That's how I look to poetry. But everyone has another opinion. Still I keep sticking to that one. I can try to make something else but I think it will suck. Or I even can't make up something. Thanks for the comments btw.

[*Lady_Kikyo*]

Poetry isn't always about emotion. Seems that you need to broaden the horizon.

you also forget not everyone studies poetry to the extent to where they can write in different forms and what not..some ppl just feel something and they write it out..i think this is a great poem..i think you just expect too much from eveyone. ppl should be allowed to write out what they want and how they want as long as they feel theyre getting a point accross or their emotions out.

[Azel]

I can't tell you how sick I am of poems like this. So shallow...

Why not delve into something a bit more complicated, or dare say it, interesting? Especially since all of your poems have been about the same thing (Or something close to it.).

I agree. It's always "searching for that someone" or "found that someone who finally completes me" or "lost in my apathetic despair" or "I am going to find the most inconsequential thing to get extremely sad over". When it comes to the emotions in most poems posted on AF it is either a high low, or a high high. Why not post about something deeper? Something darker? I mean if you are going to be sad you mine as well be sad for good reason. Think of all the unjust happenings in this world? All the sick, sadistic and unnessecary things that carry on everyday. You know pain? There are rape and abuse victims that carry very happy lives. You could write something thats a little more meaningful instead of being apathetic about the littlest things or, heres a suprise, change your perspective on life for once. Life may be cruel, but life is a ugly yet beautiful thing, make a poem about finding the most romantic beauty in the oddest places. Write a poem about waking up too see that you have been living an intricate lie. I don't care if it's true, because I don't want to read your biography, I don't care if your poem is from the deepest fabrications of your mind, I just want something good, something deep, something introspective. Something that after I read I can reflect on and say, hey, that was worth reading, or hey, that was pretty interesting, I never looked at it that way, or if you can pull this off, hey I know where that guy/girl is coming from. If you want some words for development here are the words I give you. This is my brutal honesty.

[dream magician]

Nice poem,Train. Love it,...i never do get tired of reading those ones that you made.
Keep it up,i'll be cheering up for you!!!

[TodayIsMine]

Ok...I'm sorry. I'm normally not this critical of poetry, and I know you've got crap in your life that this is possibly related to. But...I couldn't even finish the poem. Too many kids your age are writing the same stuff over and over again. It's all about "I want to die. I miss my soul. I live in hell. I feel so lost without my heart." It's too overdone...

[BlazingSoul]

Awesome. It's nicely written. Good job