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  1. #1
    The lonely wolf Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default betraying

    Internet is going slow im working on a other one. Its almost finished i think i hope i can post them.


    Poem Betraying

    We were having fun.
    Together on the run.
    We folowd a road.
    We traveld by boat.

    Now were older.
    You become colder.
    I was not watching.
    And then you stabed me with that thing.

    It was knive.
    That took away my live.
    How could this be?
    I didint flee.

    I didint notice.
    Wat was all this ?
    Just for a second you slipped away.
    And now im broken on the x ray.

  2. #2
    Member Flay is a jewel in the rough Flay is a jewel in the rough Flay is a jewel in the rough Flay's Avatar
    Gil
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    Hmm . . . KillingJoke, this poem, it dosen't have your ussual way of getting some emotion accross, I think this one needs an operation-revamping. The rhythme just isn't there. I can see where you are trying to go with this, I think, but it just hasn't gotten there yet. IMO. not trying to be mean here though. I wish I could explain it better. anyways . . .
    Peace be with you.
    http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs8/300W...enLiedClub.jpg

  3. #3
    The lonely wolf Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star has a reputation beyond repute Howling Star's Avatar
    Gil
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    Hehehe i know wat ya mean. I was kinda in the uhm how you say that. Hmm i think the ''insparation'' was gone. But thanks i can do someting with this comment.And if you want you can just call me Train. Kilingjoke is a old name. You can use both chose one you like better.

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