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Thread: Anyone?

  1. #1
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default Anyone?

    Does anyone hear my silent cries,
    Or does no one see past these awful lies?
    Does anyone see my invisible tears,
    Or do they all hide behind their childish fears?
    Does anyone notice I'm not here,
    Or am I to them petty and mere?

    Is there anywhere that I can stay in peace?
    Somewhere that I mustn't rent or lease?
    Is there anywhere for me that's safe,
    Shall I forever be a lonesome waif?
    Is there anywhere to be my home,
    Or Forever will I stray and roam?

    You're the one that heard my cries,
    Quickly, saw past those awful lies,
    That soft touch faded my invisible tears,
    Never would you show any fears,
    You're sad whenever I'm not here,
    You wouldn't let me feel petty and mere.

    In you're arms was my place of peace,
    Never again will my hope decrees,
    You're kiss makes me always feel safe,
    I shall not again be a lonesome waif,
    You're heart forever will be my home,
    Apart I and my sadness has grown.....
    __________________________________________________ ______________
    Thankies for reading! Toodles!
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  2. #2
    Brownies :Q__ Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny has a reputation beyond repute Daimastuny's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    Very sad poem indeed, but very well done. Has a nice flow and good choice of words. Great work Vendetta, keep on writing.

    <3ies, ~dai

  3. #3
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    Thanks you! I actaully had to look up one word!
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  4. #4
    Morale: [||||||||||||||||] LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    ^ ^ Pretty good Vendetta-san ^ ^ Keep it up!
    Careful, I don't take you lightly.
    Sig set made by Daken
    _________________________________________________
    S. O. S. Finest Swordmaster

  5. #5
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Gracias lucky! and when did I become Vendetta-san because Bluefox always called me Detta-Chan... But, yea.... Uhm thankies for commenting!
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  6. #6
    Gothic Lolita Skyla-chan Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G has much to be proud of Skyla_G's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    Wow. I enjoy how the saddness is folded, you change the ending so it's not completely sad. There's an odd type of imagry where in the first verse say "silent cries" and "invisible tears". To wipe away a tear that isnt visible a person must be really empathetic<3 Very expressive poetry. Keep up the great work!
    ~Skyla

  7. #7
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Why, thank you. Usually for my poetry the ending doesn't match the poem much. I tend to made the ending happy, because what is the point of a poem like this?

    I'm so sad,
    No one can see,
    Even when I'm mad,
    no one can see,
    no matter what,
    no one can see.....

    And that would be the end. I mean, it's not interesting because it's just TOO darn depressing. Every now and then I switch it up, start with love.... then turn it to sadness.... (just look at my other poems, if you want, and youw ill notice the pattern!)
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  8. #8
    how...random *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears* has much to be proud of *unshed~tears*'s Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    Sad but very good. Keep up the good work.






  9. #9
    Yin and Yang Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf has a reputation beyond repute Water Wolf's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    WOW! *apladues* that is AWESOME poetry! dang! really really good keep it up and keep it going!
    Guardian ofShadow Fangs
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    Your're Aweful{ \. . . {.} . . I love you!

  10. #10
    spawn of dragons skater2791 is a glorious beacon of light skater2791 is a glorious beacon of light skater2791 is a glorious beacon of light skater2791 is a glorious beacon of light skater2791 is a glorious beacon of light skater2791's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    really good vendetta......i hope to see more from u^^
    anger+sadness+happiness+confusion=life
    skater2791


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  11. #11
    Heartless Soul Eater Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater has much to be proud of Heartless Soul Eater's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    very very good

    Sig made by -Ookami-




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