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Thread: A Walk In The Rain

  1. #1
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default A Walk In The Rain

    I walk in the rain,
    Hear it pounding on the street,
    In a deep thought,
    Wondering why....

    Why did we meet?
    Your kindness so sweet,
    Why did you come to me?
    With your thoughts I agree,
    Why did this occur?
    You made my life a blur....

    I feel the rain,
    Hair dripping,
    Heart hurting,
    I remember back....

    I first met you,
    You stuck like glue,
    Your kindness suprised me,
    You where on a happy spree,
    I thought you where strange,
    Soon my opinion would change.....

    I drag my feet,
    Walking in the puddles,
    Looking at the ground,
    In a transe like state,
    A part of my mind opens....

    To when I said i love you,
    You felt that way too,
    Telling me nice things,
    Already thinking of rings,
    I wasn't read for that,
    Just a casual chat,
    In love so deep,
    Your heart I wanted to keep....

    I kick a rock,
    Still staring down,
    I look up and drive my tears,
    The thought I have hurts....

    The first time we fought,
    Stings of love so taut,
    Couldn't handle the pressure,
    Needinga love thats fresher,
    Our differences where great,
    Causing problems at out dates,
    Anger filled me heart,
    Slowly, our love would depart....


    An eerie silence comes,
    The rain has stopped,
    Sun shining above,
    When I realize,
    It's you that I still love....
    _______________________________________________
    Thanks for reading. PLEASE post a tip or comment!
    Last edited by Fabala; 07-18-2008 at 11:50 PM. Reason: removed text color
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  2. #2
    Pantsu on my head desu~ .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic has a reputation beyond repute .mystic's Avatar
    Gil
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    Wonderfull, yet again it flows. And it is sad.. i think poems are only meant to be sad, or romantic ^.^
    dead.

  3. #3
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    They are ent to express how I feel....I don't know If I'm sad or what just kind of blah. I tried something different with this poem. One section is what I'm doing and doesn't ryhme. The next is what I'm thinking and does ryhme. Thanks for the comliment! *Reps*
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  4. #4
    Morale: [||||||||||||||||] LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo has a reputation beyond repute LittleMomo's Avatar
    Gil
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    I love it! It flows way better than my poems. Keep it up Ven-chan!
    Careful, I don't take you lightly.
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  5. #5
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Thanks! I tried my best to make it flow..But, it isn't that great.
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  6. #6
    Member DarkWind: Lord of Dragons is on a distinguished road DarkWind: Lord of Dragons's Avatar
    Gil
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    Post Poem

    I think It was great...
    Best one Ive read on AF so far...
    You should write more...
    With an army of Dragons I Shall Rule the World!!!!!
    Hahahaha.....

  7. #7
    Junior Member Heart_of_a_Shadow will become famous soon enough Heart_of_a_Shadow's Avatar
    Gil
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    That was the best p[oem I think I've heard yet... wow.. your really good.. the way it flowed perfectly, as well as all the right things for a poem.. awesome..
    "I am What I am because of what I do, and no one shall change that.." - Lindsay M. Prower - The Fight for Truth - Roleplay

    http://lindsayprower.deviantart.com/ <- Visit If You Dare


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  8. #8
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    Gil
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    Default

    A sad poem of regret. Regret is for people who
    have earned the right to look back on the past.
    A very deep and agreeable poem. Nicely done.
    Signature by Seung-li


  9. #9
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lilium
    A sad poem of regret. Regret is for people who
    have earned the right to look back on the past.
    A very deep and agreeable poem. Nicely done.
    Does that mean I shouldn't regret? I still love the person it was for but you know that's okay 'cause we won't get back together. Past is the past can't change it right?
    Set made by me
    98% or teens do or have tried pot :: If you're one of the 2% that hasn't post this in your signature::

  10. #10
    Gravity of Love Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi has much to be proud of Mamimi Maromi's Avatar
    Gil
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    Whoa.Nice,I love the way it is in questions mostly.Your poem is depressing ,but it has a nice vibe to it.I like it.You are a talented poem writer.Keep up the good work.



    repps.
    meow.

  11. #11
    The Closet Girl... Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku has much to be proud of Anime_Otaku's Avatar
    Gil
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    this is a depressing poem but its very deep and it has a good flow! and good choice of words, Nicely done.

  12. #12
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    Your very talented Vendetta, I really liked your poem, it's one of the best I have read in here. There are some little errors, but good choice of words and nice flow you got there too. Like Lilium said it's very deep, I like that. Keep writing, I would like to see more.

  13. #13
    2 b frg10 = wrs thn deth. Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura has a reputation beyond repute Tempest Valkura's Avatar
    Gil
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    I understand what you wanted to say, but you may want to check your spelling and grammar. Other than those mistakes I say it's a good piece of work. It flows well and makes good use of the vast english language. Keep it up! ; ) (I'd use the smily, but it's a bit over the top.)
    Last edited by Tempest Valkura; 07-16-2006 at 07:34 AM.

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