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Thread: Why you leave?

  1. #1
    Lady Warrior of AncalimŽ Warrior5thelement will become famous soon enough Warrior5thelement will become famous soon enough Warrior5thelement's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default Why you leave?

    Why you leave me?

    Leave me in the dark

    Dark all around me

    Me here and now

    Now i feel pain

    Pain from my heart

    Heart beats for you

    You left me good-bye

    good-bye to the pain and your excuses

    excuses excuses you left me for her

    her my bestfriend

    bestfriends no more so get out of of my life

    life no more with you

    you and I are no more.
    ----------------------------------

    This pome is for anyone who had a break up for feels that way sorry if this sounded werid.




  2. #2
    Llama Cheeze Puff Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta has a reputation beyond repute Vendetta's Avatar
    Gil
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    Default

    Bravo! A few things though, some sentances just don't sounds right. Ex: Her my best friend. Maybe just add a comma or something and it would have a better rythme. If you read it aloud some things sound kind of odd... Although, my poems always sounds bad XD.
    Set made by me
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  3. #3
    Lady Warrior of AncalimŽ Warrior5thelement will become famous soon enough Warrior5thelement will become famous soon enough Warrior5thelement's Avatar
    Gil
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    thanks and sorry i know alot dont make sound right -_- I'am working on it tho




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