my two cents...

[miss honeybee ai]

First up I don't really know or care whether this will be locked up or I'll get in trouble for saying this but,
Ever since I joined here although there are some really cool people here a majority of you aren't really nice. I was reading posts like that person who wanted help for instance.

In other circumstances I would be like I don't care , but doesn't it make anyone feel bad that if that person was being geniune with their statement and they actually did something wouldn't it make you feel bad.

Another thing I know this is a really big forum and that I am not exactly the best person around here but I find it really hard to even try to talk to people here . Its really off putting and I am sure that a lot of people would feel the same way as I do.

Now I guess that is all I have to say but if you want people to stay stop acting like a big bunch of stuck up jerks.

[Zantetsuken]

You need to realize that in life you're going to deal with people that are a bunch of jerks. There are so many different types of people here which means dealing with different personalites, opinion, etc. I don't see a reason to worry or even make a big deal about it because it's just going to get harder further down the road. Just use this as experience for the real world and don't put so much into it. Just be yourself, and if people don't want to talk to you or have a problem, that's their problem. I really like what you had to say because it shows a part of you that's important and most people don't really do that. So just keep being you and let them be jerks or whoever. That's the most you can ask from yourself.

[miss honeybee ai]

I usually can at least try and deal with this but the whole thing about someone asking for help ( ok so it was from strangers but who cares) its super depressing and it reminded me of how one of my friends died.

[Zantetsuken]

Some people are desperate. The best thing you can do is just respect what their situation is or just don't even care.

[miss honeybee ai]

Hmm

I guess. But I guess I can't be cruel enough to say that I don't care whether you want to die. It's not very fair.

[Zantetsuken]

That's just one thing that proves that you're human.

[Daenerys]

You can't complain if people aren't nice to you when you're not nice. I've seen a few instances when you were rude to a user, so you can expect others to be rude back.

Also, if you don't want to be here, no one's making you stay. If you find it hard to approach people, that's not really a fault of the members of the forum. That's a personal issue.

[Fabala]

It hurts that people can be so callous and cruel. Many of them would never act that way in person but feel a certain freedom when they step online...that other person's problem, to them, isn't a REAL problem. They get their kicks out of acting in a way they normally wouldn't.

Not to say that there aren't people who ARE jerks in person. I've known enough of them myself. However, for better and worse, the internet has opened people up. It's so easy to lie...particularly about the kind of person you are.

As for the forum size... I feel that way when I go to large forums myself. I was a member here from the beginning when there was only a handful of people, and thus built it into a kind of home forum. On the other forums, I try to find my niche. Find other people interested in the same things I am, or approach people who seem like those I'd like to get to know.

[Manhattan_Project_2000]

The problem I have with that thread was that sure, the poster was ill-advised to make a post about being depressed on an online forum where few people know them. I mean, I know I didn't care but then again, I didn't post either. The problem with posting to those sorts of threads in a mean way is either...

A) They really are depressed, and calling a depressed stupid is both ridiculously easy and doesn't help anyone.
B) They want attention, and you're giving it to them.

Masali and Redfield sometimes take it too far. I mean, most people who post depression stuff to a message board are just being overdramatic drama queens, to that I'll agree. But rubbing their face in it usually just makes you look like a jerk.

[Sadie]

Ok, i havent been here to long but this seems to be a way nice forum, with decent people.
sure you might be intimidated by some, but that under no curcumstances means EVERYONE is like that.
This is a community like forum, in the real world not everyone in a community is a.) gonna be ur best friend b.) give two shits about you c.) get along with you.

some people are overly friendly and will welcome u with open arms, others, well it just takes time to be accpeted. just take it as it is. and remeber. Its just the internet.

another idea, is to make friends with other new members who are feeling the same hostility as you. Making friends with them will help u create an extended friend base which will make you feel more welcome.

[lorie]

dont worry honeybee this forum isnt as bad as u think. frankly there is no point in caring about ppl who are rude to u or about ure opinion. just enjoy ureself here the best u can.its not as easy as it sounds but u CAN make friends here. now THATS easy. most ppl here are nice if some ppl disagree with ure opinion then its just their opinion. if anyone gets intentionally rude and u know it just argue bak and try something where u can shut them up. or at least make it look like u dont care.
oh and like sadie said it IS just the internet.

[Vendetta]

Most people are nice, that is just what yo think when they post. we state our opinions here, and if we don't like what someone sayd, it may seem 'mean' to you, But how else are we suppose to get what we want across? for example I didn't like one of the mods at all, but when I had a conversation with her she tearned out to be an awsome person. so, just don't say people are mean for saying what they want. Also, think about ti, if everyone was nice and let you do what ever, and no one was strict and held rules, this place would be a fiasco!!

[Buruku]

First up I don't really know or care whether this will be locked up or I'll get in trouble for saying this but,
Ever since I joined here although there are some really cool people here a majority of you aren't really nice. I was reading posts like that person who wanted help for instance.

In other circumstances I would be like I don't care , but doesn't it make anyone feel bad that if that person was being geniune with their statement and they actually did something wouldn't it make you feel bad.

Another thing I know this is a really big forum and that I am not exactly the best person around here but I find it really hard to even try to talk to people here . Its really off putting and I am sure that a lot of people would feel the same way as I do.

Now I guess that is all I have to say but if you want people to stay stop acting like a big bunch of stuck up jerks.

This is pretty funny.
You shouldnt take it so personal. You find it hard to talk to people? We'll even though I have been around this place religiously for 7 months I STILL don't really talk to anyone.
I guess I know what your talking about with the 'rude' people, there ARE people that take it too far ( I don't have to mention names) but you just learn that thats how they are and you get over it.
Seems to me that its the older members that lack patience and loose thier 'cheery disposition'.(and of course there are exceptions) If you look at the new members you'll see a lot of "Hi I'm new!' 'wanna join my family?''yay!' and they carry on in their 'newbish' merrymaking. But some people just get sick of seeing the same threads, same opinions, same idiots, so yes there are some irritated members that have made it a favorite activity to point out every stupid thing someone says.
But really there are a great many more nice people then 'mean' ones. I can count the 'meanies' on one hand, and they don't even bother me. They make sure that they are bluntly inconsiderate and don't give a crap about what people like you think, frankly I say it makes the forum more interesting.

[Sinnaku]

Pardon me bumping this but once I strolled in here I could not possibly uhh, not post. Yeah.

Ok, I will agree with those above me, especially MP2K's post. Reading it, I thought "Nothin' but the truth to help you God."
I believe depressed kids, or emos, are one of my top pet peaves. Yes, I hate them. So much... well, I won't embroidle it with detail on how much I hate them but you can just understand that they like, my arch nemesis that I am so much better than.

This is the reason people don't like me, it's because I have opinions and that a lot of the people on this forum are whiney teens and will say anything the can to try to back themselves up. I find it rather funny to see what they say. I've had emos get so blindisded by my insults that they studder left and right. It's truly quite a show.

Thus, the #1 reason that people are mean is because they will not accept your opinion if it differs from their's. The reason for that is this: they all believe themselves untouchably better than everyone when it is everyone who are untouchably better than them.

You are right to find such overly dramatic people to be annoying, it's only natural that those who have lives do think such things. What you must know, however, is that if you are the first to speak up a different opinion, that automatically makes you a better person that anyone who tries to yell at you or, in many cases, because it has to exist,, give you "bad rep!" Ooo, i'm so afraid of the rep! It's going to damage me in ways I could never imagine! Ahh! Bah, humbug! Rep is just a way for emo teens to have a way to make themselves feel superior to someone. So I say, let the babies have their bottles, it's no skin off my back. As long I know i've already accomplished more than them by not getting aggrovated. 'Nuff said.

[Tsuna Kadiri]

Well, who is to catagorize what a 'nice' member is and what a 'mean' member is. People have different opinions, people explain their opinions differently, ect. Not just on this forum, but everywhere in the world. And that's not to say that I don't think you know that already.

Personally, I've always had massive respect for people that aren't afraid to give their opinion, no matter what. Internet or real life, no difference. Despite what critisizms or bashing they'll get, they say it anyways. Alot of people think that's being ignorant or arrogant, but I think it takes alot of guts. And also to be able to back up what you say on top of that. I wish I could just freely, flat out, tell it like it is and not worry about what other people's reactions are going to be, but it's not easy.

So.. I guess I don't really know where I'm going with this, but there will always be people you don't like or agree with. You learn how to work around or deal with the differences you have. Instead of complaining about how someone is so hard to get along with and how immature you think they are.

[Ωmega]

Well, cant say I know what happened in this 'he asked for help' thread, but yes, there are some extremly nasty members here...and I dont need to name names...but theres a good amount of us that are some of the nicest people youll meet! Just need to know where to look ^.^

[akiko_kalla]

One other thing to think about is sometimes the people, on message boards and in life, are responding because of their own past. If you were raised harshly, or your life is particularly crappy you probably aren't going to have much patience for someone who is whining about people not liking them because you know worse things exist. Yes, this other person may not, but you have survived because of the attitude you have towards problems. It's just as easy to call someone a jerk when s/he's responding to a difficult life as it is to hit a person when s/he's down.

Also understand, for many the internet isn't real; you can hide behind whatever facade you wish. There are many who aren't like this, but the ones who are fall on both sides of this type of thing. There are those who go off pushing the limits simply because they can with little real consequences. Then there are also those who go off painting a sad sob story to get attention. Once you've dealt with both types, you are weary to trust anyone. Common sense usually prevails, but you sometimes can't judge the comments until the thread has developed more. What I have found is it's best to wait and see what happens...usually if the person is truly selfish, it becomes obvious.

Lastly, understand that people are human and have pet peeves. As stated earlier, sometimes people do the more mature route and simply don't respond, othertimes they do respond either out of immaturity or simply just being fed up. It's just part of life and being human; no one is perfect and each moment is a new learning experience. If you really care, either respond in the thread or message the person. If the person really is in need, they will be grateful and learn more from that than those with negative responses. Remember, when you post something in public, you are leaving it open to judgement and criticism. It's a difficult lesson and most people learn the hard way, but it is usually learned with time.

[Opinionated]

Hey, my policy is to be honest about what I think. If it's brutally honest, it's still honest. Part of my guiding policy is this quote:

"You should always try to tell the truth, because if you tell the truth you make it the other person's problem."
~ Sean Connery.

Therefore, I tell the truth about what I feel to releive myself of problems. Even if it creates new problems, that means more truth telling to do.

[suky]

I changed somethings,they were just tooooo boring.

Pardon me bumping this but once I strolled in here I could not possibly uhh, not post. Yeah.

Ok, I will agree with those above me, especially MP2K's post. Reading it, I thought "Nothin' but the....major blah, blah, blah,....*yawns of boredem*...something about being dumb.... I am so much better than.

This is the reason people.....More, blah, blah, blah..... studder left and right. It's truly quite a show.

Thus, the #1 reason......so much blah, blah, blah.......,,better than them.

You are right to find such overly dramatic people to be annoying,............something about not careing if getting a bad rep and more blah, blah, blah................ accomplished more than them by not getting aggrovated. 'Nuff said.

*finishes reading and yawns*

Yeah some people are rude in this forum, probably they get picked on at their school, I actually feel sorry for them, they don't know how to express their feelings so they start acting all 'badboy/tough guy' in the internet. Depressed/emos are not afraid to express what they feel, If you don't like what they wrote then don't post simple as that!. Theres a difference between giving constructive critisism and being a jerk. If you feel like they're being over dramatic then just say 'too much drama' instead of 'I give it a 0 it had no meaning what so ever,....blah, blah, blah,......in other words it sucked. keep trying'. Some people act before they think, prob. drink too much beer or something, but theres also very kind people here! you just have too look a little closer and they will be there streching out their hand to you!

[Cat_Demon]

i knew i wasnt the only one who thought that some of you people can be so stuck up not mentioning names or anything but some of you need to losen up and get a life.

Some of you are really nice and normal for the others i dont care if you rep me back make threats at me, it doesnt hurt, and most of you are probably holding up ur little pride you have while you read this

[Music Fiend]

Meh, I don't even bother posting in those depressed/I want to hurt myself, or whatever, threads. However, even if I'm uninterested in what they are saying, I don't attacked them or make them feel like dirt. Its so unneccessary. If there is a topic that I don't like or I have a problem with, I just ignore it, and if its something pointless, the mods will trash it. You never know when those people could be telling the truth and are actually planning on hurting themselves or hate themselves. I certainly don't want to chance anything, by laughing at someone or telling them that their problem is full of crap. Maybe I'm too much of a nice guy, but why the heck would you go out of your way to make someone feel like crap. If I was actually in that situation, I'd feel like total crap. Yet, this is STILL the internet; full of lying, awful people who will do anything for attention. Its sad, really, when someone has to trash someone else ~ and for what? To make themselves feel better and to get a good laugh? Pfft, disgusting. I don't have a problem with being honest, blunt, and aggressive, when it comes to my opinions. However, somethings can be taken too far; that's where I draw the line.

[Manhattan_Project_2000]

Yeah some people are rude in this forum, probably they get picked on at their school, I actually feel sorry for them, they don't know how to express their feelings so they start acting all 'badboy/tough guy' in the internet. Depressed/emos are not afraid to express what they feel, If you don't like what they wrote then don't post simple as that!. Theres a difference between giving constructive critisism and being a jerk. If you feel like they're being over dramatic then just say 'too much drama' instead of 'I give it a 0 it had no meaning what so ever,....blah, blah, blah,......in other words it sucked. keep trying'. Some people act before they think, prob. drink too much beer or something, but theres also very kind people here! you just have too look a little closer and they will be there streching out their hand to you!

Do you realize how hypocritical you look after insulting Sinnaku like that? Because it is blindingly obvious to me.

[akiko_kalla]

Many jokes are at the expense of someone. Blond jokes, fat jokes, racial jokes, gender jokes, etc. And yet most people can find some humor in it. Just as you can't assume the person posting a problem is taking it seriously, nor can you assume the person posting a response is taking it seriously.

As for being not so nice, many people who were/are treated poorly treat others the same. If that was the first type of community you posted in, that is probably how you learned to "survive" on that forum, same thing in life. Eventually it just becomes how you react and express your thoughts. Doesn't make it right, but it's the same as someone not understanding how people could be so mean if they have not had terrible experiences in the past. And before anyone gets riled up, I am speaking in generalities, not specifics.

People just cope in different ways. I've seen what emotional distress can do to a person, especially a young person. To be honest, this is not the place to discuss it as there are people of various ages and backgrounds here. People can listen, but if you are not knowledgeable on the issues a person may be dealing with, sometimes advice does more harm than good. However, just as a person posts here looking for help there is someone replying curtly who is probably in the same emotional state. Things are not black and white; there is a wide spectrum of developmental and emotional issues that go into every action.

I am all for being polite and respectful, but understand there are people who respond in a less than desirable manner whose lives are just as dark as those asking for help. Especially if that person feels the seeker is being anything but sincere, they will most likely react. Perhaps they are posting out of annoyance and rudeness, but perhaps they are posting as honestly trying to help by making the person see that their life isn't that bad. Not the most tactful way, but if that is how you cope with things, that is how you will try to help others cope. I've had someone who I am sure thought was trying to help be quite offensive and that point was totally lost on them.

Sometimes rudeness, anger, frustration, etc. are more signs of pain than annoyance. Of course they may truly not care, but if you're going to say the one seeking help could really mean it, you should also admit that the one replying may truly be trying to help or have an issue preventing them from softening their tone. You can't judge those acting rude as being true jerks and then disregard all the jerks who post to get attention. There are exceptions to both sides. I know the student I helped would not have been someone asking for help, but someone who came on telling others to get over it.

[Cat_Demon]

Meh, I don't even bother posting in those depressed/I want to hurt myself, or whatever, threads. However, even if I'm uninterested in what they are saying, I don't attacked them or make them feel like dirt. Its so unneccessary. If there is a topic that I don't like or I have a problem with, I just ignore it, and if its something pointless, the mods will trash it. You never know when those people could be telling the truth and are actually planning on hurting themselves or hate themselves. I certainly don't want to chance anything, by laughing at someone or telling them that their problem is full of crap. Maybe I'm too much of a nice guy, but why the heck would you go out of your way to make someone feel like crap. If I was actually in that situation, I'd feel like total crap. Yet, this is STILL the internet; full of lying, awful people who will do anything for attention. Its sad, really, when someone has to trash someone else ~ and for what? To make themselves feel better and to get a good laugh? Pfft, disgusting. I don't have a problem with being honest, blunt, and aggressive, when it comes to my opinions. However, somethings can be taken too far; that's where I draw the line.

i agree with him, i have friends that you could consider emo or depressed or whatever and they have tried to hurt themselves, but since im like a person who hangs out with everyone i didnt find this out till after they did it since they never told me or when i asked they said no. To be honest if someone wants to hurt themself or kill themself or anything of the sort, you shouldnt encourage them to do so, its completly barbaric(sp?), if you dont want to be apart of it egnore(sp?) them and if you are going to say something make sure its nice like you shouldnt do it, or think of wut you'll leave behind, not you are to much of a sissy you couldnt do it. Some of you people always pick on the ones who you know wont fight back. If you have a problem with my post yell at me and ill fight back, but to go after the defenseless is wrong and shows how low you are.

[Sadie]

i agree with him, i have friends that you could consider emo or depressed or whatever and they have tried to hurt themselves, but since im like a person who hangs out with everyone i didnt find this out till after they did it since they never told me or when i asked they said no. To be honest if someone wants to hurt themself or kill themself or anything of the sort, you shouldnt encourage them to do so, its completly barbaric(sp?), if you dont want to be apart of it egnore(sp?) them and if you are going to say something make sure its nice like you shouldnt do it, or think of wut you'll leave behind, not you are to much of a sissy you couldnt do it. Some of you people always pick on the ones who you know wont fight back. If you have a problem with my post yell at me and ill fight back, but to go after the defenseless is wrong and shows how low you are.

Its not a good thing to encourage but many people who act this way or tend to go threw "phases" of suicidal depression, are often looking for attention if they are willingly admitting there issue. Its those who hurt themselves in seceret or dont talk about it that u should look out for. Those others are often just attention seeker who want sympathy.
i think the best way to get them back to normal is to give a "i dont care" reverse treatment, or a "quit you whining" it may seem cruel, but its the only way to snap em back to reality. Hopefully they will thank u later.