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Thread: Red Queen Effect

  1. #1
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Default Red Queen Effect

    WARNING: While short, this is not a pretty story...not a happy story. Mine generally aren't, and this one more than most. If you like your characters happy and your endings "happily ever after" turn back now.

    Otherwise, please give me some feedback. I can't decide what I think of this just yet. It was in my head for a long time, I attmpted writing it over and over, only to have it come out all at once, just like that.




    “That’s the trouble with survival of the fittest, isn’t it? The corpse at your feet. That little inconvenience.” – Wally Lamb, I Know This Much is True


    Red Queen Effect


    Her nakedness was the first thing I noticed. That her skin really was bare, glistening palely in a sinister glow on awkwardly placed, dangling limbs did not occur to me until later.

    “The coat! Where’s the coat?” My voice was steadily rising on each word.

    My mother turned to me. Mechanically, as if she were the ballerina placed precariously on one toe, swirling forever atop a child’s music box. My shoulder ached under the nails of her vice-like grip. Her hollowed eyes looked sunken, a jack-o-lantern half complete. Her mouth gaped, forming words she couldn’t speak aloud.

    “It’s my coat. She borrowed it from me! I want to know where it is.”

    She released my shoulder.

    ***

    Alit under the light of the moon she danced barefoot in icy blades of grass. Laughed. He found the red suggestive. Enticing. She did not stray from his bared teeth, but stroked his whiskered cheek. He lapped at her heel.

    I watched from our window, fearful of eyes glowing the same yellow as her hair. I heard her scream. In pleasure.

    ***

    “May and April are my favorite months. I decided those would be the names of my daughters. I would have no more and no less than two, you see.”

    “…And then your great grandmother died…”

    “Yes. And her name was Gertrude, passed down from her mother. Everyone called her Gertie as well.”

    “May and Gertrude. You don’t see the difference there? It’s not fair!”

    “What?”

    “Never mind.”

    ***

    “Oh, you know, they’re sisters,” my mother said, tittering with laughter. “Girls will be girls.” She said this everywhere, every time my sister and I fought or looked at each other cross-eyed. I think she even believed it.

    May, my older sister, had mastered the art of fighting gracefully. A sly remark dropped at precisely the right moment would leave me hot and sputtering for words, and in the blame. She’d smirk at me from over our mother’s shoulder, while I endured my scolding. Not even a face like that could mar the perfection of her looks.
    God, I hate her.

    Two years older than me, I grew up in May’s perfect shadow. Teachers called me by her name, or sighed in exasperation when things did not come so easily to me as they had for her. Of course, May’s grades are also perfection. I’d grit my teeth every time I heard her humble herself, claiming hours of study. I shared a room with her. She never cracked open a book. She just knew the answers. Classmates used to sidle up to me to attempt befriending her. Later, boys dropped me numerous awkwardly versed notes to send her way. I tossed all but the ones I knew she’d reject anyway.

    Even when May left me behind in junior high for high school, I knew no peace. Teachers had all but given up on my report card resembling May’s. I studied every night, but had my only ‘A’ in Physical Education. I imagined every ball to be May’s head.

    ***


    “I’ll give it back to you in one piece, I promise. It goes with my outfit, see?”

    “What?” She held my red coat in her hands. Almost cloak-like it hugged the shoulders and billowed out in ripples to about mid-thigh on me and mid-buttocks on May. It also looked better on her. “May, no! Come on!”

    She pursed red koolaid lips, seemingly kissed by a bee’s stinger. “It looks better on me anyway.”

    “No it doesn’t, you cow.”

    I looked to her short, short skirt, long lean legs stuffed in calf-hugging boots, and her soft, cream-colored blouse, topped with waves of butter-colored hair. My eyes narrowed, “You’re going out with him, aren’t you?”

    She flushed, looking away to the doorway before turning on a heel to glide that way, coat trailing.

    ***

    She was late to breakfast again. When at last she stumbled in, her eyes were heavy-lidded and ringed with lack of sleep and smeared mascara.

    I eyed her closely. “You forgot to take off your makeup last night.”

    She slumped in her chair, stared dully into a bowl of cheerios grown soggy in milk. She reached for her spoon, but her hand remained, limp, on the table next to it.

    “May! What happened to you?” Our mother had breezed in soundlessly, nurse’s garb pristine. I watched her place a hand tenderly on my sister’s forehead, stroking her hair with the other.

    “I don’t feel so well Mom…”

    “You don’t look so well, either.”

    I looked from one to the other. “Mom…”

    “Not now Gertie.” She patted May’s soft buttery waves. “I don’t think you should be going to school today.”

    “I don’t know Mom…”

    Our mother smiled affectionately. At her. “I think you can afford to miss one day. Why don’t you head back to your room and get some sleep.”

    “Well…all right.”

    I scowled, kicking the leg of my chair.

    ***

    Alit under the light of the moon she danced barefoot in icy blades of grass. Laughed. He found the red suggestive. Enticing. She did not stray from his bared teeth, but stroked his whiskered cheek. He lapped at her heel.

    I watched from our window, fearful of eyes glowing the same yellow as her hair. I heard her scream. In pleasure.

    ***

    “What the hell, May?”

    “What?”

    “You’re going out again? We have midterms next week!”

    “Mind your own business.”

    “Don’t you think Mom’s going to notice when you don’t get straight-A’s for the first time in your life?”

    “Shut up.”

    “Fine. It’s your life. Just try not to ruin my coat, okay?”

    ***

    “Gertie…”

    I looked up from my books scattered on the bed to see my mother hovering in the doorway. Worry furrowed her brow. “Yeah Mom?”

    “I want to talk to you. ”

    I shoved books out of her way. She perched next to me on the bed, dry hands clawing at each other.

    “It’s May…”

    I waited. In the ensuing silence I returned my attention to the history notes. My mother’s fingers played over an image of Marie Antoinette absently.

    “I know she’s been…sick…a lot lately.” Fingers drumming over the Queen’s coitured hair. “This morning I got your report cards. All her grades are down, and her teachers are concerned with the number of absences lately.”

    I reached to touch her hands. They relaxed their knots.

    She looked at me with pleading eyes. “She hasn’t made up her midterms yet. I don’t think they’re going to allow much more leeway.”

    “Oh they probably will, Mom. Come on. It’s May. Say no more.”

    She smiled in lips only. “I’m worried about her, Gertie. She tells me nothing’s wrong, but looks too sick to move every morning. I’m at my wit’s end!”

    I wrapped my arms around her neck, rested my head on her shoulder. She shifted to place a warm hand on the back of my head. Its weight made my heart flutter.

    “Gertie. I want to know.” I stilled my breathing. “You two girls have been sharing a room since the day you were born. Is there something going on I should know about? Something you girls aren’t telling me?”

    I breathed in the sweet vanilla perfume she always wore, masking the chemical cleanliness smell of the hospital. She still used the bottle I bought for her last Christmas. I nestled my face against her neck. “No, Mom. Nothing.”

    She released a breath I didn’t realize she’d been holding. “All right. Well…thank you.” She patted my head, disentangled herself from me to leave.

    “Mom?” I clutched her moving hand.

    “Hm?”

    I stared into eyes gone deep with anxiety. “Don’t worry. I’m sure May will be okay.” She squeezed my hand, eyes returning to Antoinette’s youthful face before meeting mine.

    “Thanks Gertie. I’m glad one of us thinks so.” She paused at the doorway, mouth smiling. “Oh, and I’m glad to see your grades improving. Keep up the good work.”

    ***

    One night, as she slipped out the window to meet him, she tripped over the cord to her alarm clock, sending it clattering to the floor. I jumped out of sleep in shock. Black against black her silhouette loomed in front of me, made more indiscernible by my sleep-filled eyes.

    She moved to the window, where the moonlight caught strands of golden hair turned silver. She stood, hands clutching the window frame notably trembling.

    I sat up, awake. “May!” My voice was low but sharpened to a point.

    She jumped, twisted to fix glowing eyes on me. Our gazes locked for a long, quiet moment. “Go back to sleep,” she said at last.

    “But…” I trailed off, watching her lift the lock and slide open the window. It creaked. She flinched, looking to the bedroom door and listening for our mother. Nothing.

    I shivered in the breeze blowing in, tightening the blankets around my shoulders. I watched her tremble as well. “May, it’s cold.” I looked to hear near-bare legs. “Take my coat. You’ll freeze without it.”

    She looked at me for a long, quiet moment. I could see the blue bruise-like rings under her eyes bathed in moonlight.

    She pulled the coat tight around her. Its color made her hair appear white. I watched her swing a long, slender leg out over the sill and made a grunt of disgust deep in my throat. I rolled over to face a wall, listening to her completing the trip, and rolling the window to a close behind her.

    ***

    Alit under the light of the moon she danced barefoot in icy blades of grass. Laughed. He found the red suggestive. Enticing. She did not stray from his bared teeth, but stroked his whiskered cheek. He lapped at her heel.

    I watched from our window, fearful of eyes glowing the same yellow as her hair. I heard her scream. Scream.

    ***

    I was too deeply asleep to hear the ringing of the phone. What I remember is my mother shaking me to consciousness, throwing mismatched clothes at me in the dark, making animal-like noises deep in her throat.

    “May…” was all she would say when I asked. I looked to my sister’s empty bed. The sheets were pulled rigidly over the sides and to the pillow. Empty at 3 o’clock in the morning. I asked nothing further, let her hustle me out the front door in slippered feet, biting blood to our lips against the cold. I thought we’d get into an accident, her bare white hands on the wheel trembled so.

    ***

    I was my mother’s cane. They let me pass, fearful of her hollowed eyes, her talon-like fingers. Her hand felt clammy on my shoulder. I knew and didn’t know what to expect.

    I think our hearts stopped beating simultaneously when we entered the room. The two men standing in the room blended into the background. The table beside them under a spotlight hidden from sight. A crisp, pristine white sheet. Form of a body underneath.

    I stopped. The weight of my mother’s hand pressed me on. We stared at the table, the sheet, and the hidden folds of a body, afraid to breath.

    A man’s hand snaked out, gripping the edge of the sheet, asking what we all knew the answer to already. “Is this your daughter?”

    “My baby…” My mother had shut her eyes to the corpse, the butter blonde hair. Answered without seeing. Her eyes poured tears. Mine were dry.

    “Raped.”

    “Struggle.”

    “Stabbed.”

    “Left to die.”

    “Naked.”

    “Boy on the street.”

    “Identified as your daughter.”

    I listened to my mother sob in broken, choking gasps.

    ***

    When I returned home that early dark morning, I sat on the edge of my unmaid bed, unable to sleep, until the sun rose. When light touched the floor and crept towards my socked feet, I looked for the second time at May’s empty bed.

    It was then that my eyes filled with tears, my throat with inhuman moans. I threw myself, shaking, onto her bed, clutching hard the red coat hung carefully on a corner of her bed. The coat she didn’t wear that night, for the first time.

    I wept.

    I screamed, echoing my sister.
    Last edited by Fabala; 03-24-2006 at 09:59 PM.

  2. #2
    -|- Sarucay Angel -|- Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys's Avatar
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    Wow, i'd have to say that is one heck of a story. Different to say the least, but very good. I admit I had to read the whole thing through before I could do anything else. It captured my attention so easily, like a Best-seeling author. >.> here I would go on about what could be fixed, but I can't think of a thing, it was just marvelous, wonderful. I realy enjoyed it. I almost elt like I was there, watching it all from the shadows or something.

    Very Nicely Done.

  3. #3
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Haha, thank you. You're too sweet ^_~

    Let me ask you something... Does the title make sense? It does to me, but for reasons that may not occur to everyone.

  4. #4
    3D Render Doyen Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san has a reputation beyond repute Keitaru-san's Avatar
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    Very nicely done, i love sad story and unhappy ending. becuase its true.

    i didn't know you where in fanfiction...lol.
    i am daron devil I Defy heaven and hell.

    check this out to play a cool game
    http://keitaru-san.mybrute.com
    it is sweet

    http://www.animeforum.com/showthread...20#post1994520
    you like what you see? then contact me cuz i am taking request 1 AT TIME!

  5. #5
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    I dabble ;p There's a link to everything I have posted on this site in my signature.

    Thanks.

  6. #6
    -|- Sarucay Angel -|- Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys is infamous around these parts Lady Risa Emrys's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Reiako
    Haha, thank you. You're too sweet ^_~

    Let me ask you something... Does the title make sense? It does to me, but for reasons that may not occur to everyone.
    I'm assuming it has something to do with the coat. The red coat the main girl, 'Gertie' was refering to in the begining of the story, right? >>'

  7. #7
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Partially. I like symbols/titles with multiple meanings. Some more obvious than others.

    "Red Queen Effect" comes from a documentary I saw on evolution. It referenced the book "Alice in Wonderland." Towards the end of the book Alice runs a race with the queen. Running and running she realizes they aren't actually moving anywhere. When she comments on this, in exasperation, the queen replies with, "Sometimes you have to run as fast as you can to stay in place." This is known as the "red queen effect." Which ties in nicely with the idea of survival of the fittest...seen here as the lengths an individual will go to to preserve themself above all others.

    Gertie lives. May dies.
    Last edited by Fabala; 01-04-2006 at 10:38 AM.

  8. #8
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Aies' bumping inspired me to update this story ^_^ I'd tweaked and rewritten a few parts last month, but haven't bothered posting that version until now.

    Yay!

  9. #9
    boopaloop! Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated has a reputation beyond repute Opinionated's Avatar
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    Its sad. You're making me get that gut-turning feeling in my abdomen. If it hadn't been for the title, I never would have read this. No offense, but these emotional stories keep me up all night. Well, I'll tell you what I've told everyone else: Keep writing.

    All my Let's Plays can be found here!
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  10. #10
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    I like a title with multiple meanings ;p And I don't go for sappy. Emotional? Sure. Gut-wrenching? Definitely.

    Thanks for the comments.

  11. #11
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    Don't kill me Aies ;__; I've been in touch with a former writing workshop classmate. He's the editor of the school's literary magazine, and included this story. They wanted to use both of my submissions, but there wasn't enough room. Anyway, I was so touched by his partial emailed critique that I must share it.

    Nick's words:

    "I'd love to talk about the story a little later in the week with you, but something about it being a lazy, warm Saturday after a long week is hindering my critical thought process.

    For now, though, I'll say that the story made excellent use of symbolism, minimalism, and setting. The red coat as a symbol of innocence with a hint of violence was really made brilliant because it was the narrator's coat. It was a subtle to see the coat as something *May* took from the narrator -- on one hand, she took the narrator's vivacity and, in dying, took the narrator's innocence. But, in a symbolic sense, she also accepted the *burden* of death for the narrator; they are both maturing and testing boundaries, but only May dies for it. In a sense, she has died so the narrator could learn, and be saved. At least, that's how I read the red coat. Well done.

    The repetition was a great device for heightening drama -- there was music in the way you cast and recast the same scene with slight but pivotal changes. As in your other stories, giving the reader glimpses of essential information is a sophisticated technique that you execute well. I don't have the story on hand, but your opening shows that you understand the "less is more" principle. You grasp something pretty counter-intuitive for young writers: it's okay to leave the audience with snippets at the start. Not everything requires clunky, linear exposition.

    Since the story is mostly reflective -- it definitely feels like a chilled remembrance -- your settings were appropriately underdrawn, and you only went where you needed to go. *Not* including many details about May's life was key: the whole point is, May's life is beyond the pale for the narrator. She doesn't understand that loss of innocence.

    I'd say the story differed from your others most in terms of tone. You let the narrator speak here, in a way your other stories hadn't. It's more conventional, and it's smart choice for this piece. This is all about what who the central characrer is, not how the central appears to others -- which more describes Long Term Parking. William Gass calls a story like Long Term Parking "writing at zero degree" -- it's focused only on surfaces, not psychological interiors. Red Queen Effect is markedly different, but just as strong.

    The thing is, it does have more energy in the writing, since it's infused with the narartor's turmoil. That's one of the reasons we selected it to open the book. It's *not* a piece writtern in zero degree; it's much more hot-blooded, with more dramatic expression. It kick-starts our book. Long Term Parking, meanwhile, is a much colder, ambiguous, reflective piece; if we had chosen that instead, it would have ended the book. We went with Red Queen not because it was definitely better, per se, but because we had other pieces that felt appropriate at the end of the book, but none had the energy Red Queen Effect. (A word on the title: I've already talked about the importance of "red," but the title is a great way to highlight that theme. It suggests something biological. It's an "effect," like a science experiment. That works very well in the story,and I'd say it's your tendency for writing at zero degree again; "effect" is a cold word with more distance and less emotion.)

    And finally, the "Red Queen Effect" -- is that the responsibility and subsequent downfall of the one wears the red coat? Is it the idea that, someone has to make that initial journey and pay the price of hubris, to save and absolve the rest? The problem with that sacrifice, of course, is the corpse at your feet."

    A most eloquent speaker, this boy. Wonderful person to bounce writing ideas off of.

  12. #12
    Member Silent Angel has a little shameless behaviour in the past Silent Angel's Avatar
    Gil
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    As usual, you have done a stellar job. I am most jealous. ^^

  13. #13
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Hey you! It's been...oh goodness...far, far too long since I've seen you ^^ You must update me on your life. I'll update you on what Byron and I have been getting up to XD Shocking.

    And w00t! Further talks with Nick. Apparently the print editors for the book/magazine thing couldn't get enough of my two stories (this one and "Long Term Parking"). Makes me almost glad I couldn't get involved with them after all...I'd have been a blushing fiend.

  14. #14
    *~beautiful Killer~* animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe has a reputation beyond repute animeglobe's Avatar
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    omg there is no words to describe how much i like this. i like how in the begining you told readers that if you like happy poems then turn back now while you have the chance
    My Luvies


    -|J.A.G|-|Gan|-|Prime|-|Damon R|-|Rina|-|Trinity|-
    -|CFA|-|wolfy|-|tehanimefreak101|-| I{/heart}you|-
    my best bff in the world wolfwood
    Do you really like me as you say you do
    Awesome set by CFA
    Primes official Stalkers <333


  15. #15
    Kaoru loves you ♥ iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud has a reputation beyond repute iMud's Avatar
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    Good story I like tragedies lol
    ----------
    [Daughty|Fafnir|Faffy|iMud|iSi|Koko|KoKoBear|Kokolo ve|Kokolay|Kokonaut|Kokosterious|Money|Monmon|Musi c Buddeh]
    ----------
    ----------
    Credit goes to Mac for(indirectly) encouraging me to do graphic designing again. You're the best. <3
    ----------

  16. #16
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    That was not short. >/

    And I don't know why I haven't seen this until now. Sometimes I just don't see stuff.

    I'm gonna read it later though... >.> I'm reading bad daria fanfiction, and I can't not read it. It's consuming my soul (Besides I'm on vacation.) So... I'm going to pin this, so I don't forget to read it


    edit: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! SILENT ANGEL REPLIED TO THIS TOPIC!
    Last edited by Daenerys; 09-09-2006 at 09:07 AM.
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  17. #17
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Because she looooves me so ^^

    Ah, Silent Angel. Without her, I would not have my hubby today ^^

  18. #18
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    OYA. I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THAT.

    I remember plotting about ways to break them up and you were like "O_O AIES NO"
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  19. #19
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    I know... And then they grew apart and at the same time he met that chick at an anime screening. I was all "Arrrrrgh! Not another one!"

  20. #20
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    lol, ohhhh yooooou two. I wish I had our old aim conversations! That'd be something to read!
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  21. #21
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    It annoys me. I used to have SO MANY AIM/ICQ/MSN conversations saved...from years and years back. And then over the years there were multiple computer problems, and my brother lost files, and so on and so forth. So now the oldest conversation I have is one with Byron from June of 2003. ;__;

  22. #22
    boopaloop! Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys has a reputation beyond repute Daenerys's Avatar
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    Geeeeeze. I used to have like every convo ever saved. But then my MOM gave my COMPUTER to my STEP DAD, and he was only supposed to CLEAN it and give it back next weekend.

    That was in 2002. >/
    making emo kids[/URL] cry since 1998


  23. #23
    Just Some Color Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala has a reputation beyond repute Fabala's Avatar
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    Sad...so sad ;__;

    So hey, are you going to read this story or what? I don't want to keep spamming.

  24. #24
    The Greekest Letter in the Alphabet. Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega has a reputation beyond repute Ωmega's Avatar
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    Spam <3
    XD

    I LOVE this story! If it wasnt for your sig, I would have thought it was about Alice...I love that book...-sigh-
    Anyway, I liked how you repeated the same paragraph when she went out to meet this boy. I also really liked how the 'good child' and 'bad child' switch roles. I know it sounds cruel, but Im glad to see May dead at the end...you feel so bad for Getrie that you wish May dead...or maybe thats just me, and Im just cold and morbid =^.^=

    .-.
    (o.o)
    |=|
    __|__
    //.=|=.\\
    // .=|=. \\
    \\ .=|=. //
    \\(_=_)//
    (:| |: )
    || ||
    () ()
    || ||
    || ||
    ==' '==

  25. #25
    D i s t u r b e d Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie has a reputation beyond repute Ookie's Avatar
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    0.o Mods are spamming there heads off here! >< Bad bad bad!!!!


    Lawl! Lovely story :'3 MORE!!!!!
    >>>>>|| BELOW SIGNITURE BY ME ||<<<<<

    Let's do this in a cool way



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