After you die, are you heading to see the big man upstairs, or the posterchild of the alienated? (In short, are you going to heaven or hell.)
For me, well lets see.
1. I'm not christian.
2. I don't believe in God.
3. I've terrified the Johovah's Witnesses that come to your door and try to convert you.
4. I'm lazy as hell.
5. I have people who are convinced I'm going to be the evil dictator of some third world country.
Well, sorry about that, God, but I'm going STRAIGHT to hell!