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Thread: Looking for feedback on sonnet

  1. #1
    Junior Member Sjin is on a distinguished road Sjin's Avatar
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    Default Looking for feedback on sonnet

    I wrote this sonnet with themes from the Shaman King manga/anime. I'm looking for some feedback, since this is my first time doing a poem type thing. Thanks! Here it is.

    Shamanís Sonnet by Sjin

    Souls are all around us, bursting with life.
    Very few can see these spirits, and so,
    They stand out and are put into a strife,
    Be they voodoo or even Itako.
    All around the world, our people are dead,
    Killed because we are so much different.
    But why? We mean all no harm. Have no dread.
    Like the spirits to who we are to lent.
    Stripped down, naked and bare, out in the cold.
    I fear not, for ice is my only friend.
    Mother Earth, who will see our lives unfold,
    Will always embrace us after the end.
    We cannot stop it, so donít even be.
    After all this, my soul will still be me.

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    Default Re: Looking for feedback on sonnet

    Moving this to the Literature forums
    Good ol' Dogs never Die, they just keepin on livin' till their time comes.


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    Junior Member Sjin is on a distinguished road Sjin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Looking for feedback on sonnet

    Oh, I'm really sorry. I thought it went here. I'm still getting the hang of this. Thank you for moving it

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    Default Re: Looking for feedback on sonnet

    You did very well writing it. From now on, scroll down to literature section, then find poetry, you can post any and all poems there that you have written. Welcome to Animeforum and message if you have any questions about the website.
    I am no more a rose than I am its thorns.
    No more a gentle breeze than I am the hailing storm.
    I am no more hated than I am loved.
    And I am no more heartfilled than I am heartless.
    This is who I am.
    ~ELR

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