You know you watch too much anime when...
You have a pikachu in more than 3 rooms of your house.
You've ever contemplated getting lucky at the family reunion.
You reckognize this as a parody of Jeff Foxworthy jokes because you spend time with rednecks hoping to be abducted by aliens.
You immediately turn to the back of any book... because you think it's the front.
You have no furniture that is not being used to store DVDs.
You've had to stop your DVD player to let it cool down.
You've spoken Japanese to your parents and didn't notice.
While watching Scooby Doo you automatically tried to turn on the subtitles.
You sometimes have trouble remembering the word "Cartoon".
You can't do your taxes, but in your head you can figure out your life points or how long it's going to take you to watch your anime DVDs without the credits.
You've had a choice between a DVD and needed food and THOUGHT about it.
You expect a fight with your spouce when the time comes to name your kid "Kagome".
You've ever actuially gotten pissed at 4kids TV
you pronounce it "Onegai Teacher"
you can name more than 5 japanese words for "demon".
You have post traumatic stress from wars involving giant robots and demons.
You heard a Redneck joke and immediately think of the Jurai royal family.
You've been staring at animated boobs for so long that you've not only gone blind, but now see in infrared.
You're no longer turned on by "bikini" clad girls in showers
You look for subtitles while watching Scooby Doo
You KNOW Power Rangers and Beetle Borgs ripped off Voltron.
You refer to the characters only by their Japanese names... and there is NO SUCH PERSON AS MADISON DAMN IT! It's Tomoyo!!!!
You get beaten up daily at school because you're the one who got them to approve required uniforms
You get beaten by a pair of women cops for repetedly suggesting that they're a couple
Straight relationships with a non-family member no longer appeal to you
Straight relationships with a human no longer appeal
You've just brought home a plushie or action figure to meet your parents
You enrole in genewtic engeneering classes for dating purposes
Mad scientist is suddenly a legetimate career choice
You've been struck by lightning six times for worshiping your action figures
You know the names of anyone in the credits
Can't sleep Ryoko will rape me, Can't sleep Ryoko will rape me, Can't sleep...
It rains and for brief shining moment you think you've managed to sweatdrop
You've been arrested for a fist fight you got into with a kid over the dub or original japanese information is correct
Your parents found you with pictures of demons all over your room and sent you to catholic school... and now you're pretty sure you saw one of the teacher's eyes glowing
You've spent thirteen hours straight looking up anime characters witht he same namwe as your favorite and compairing them
Your friends stage an intervention... but only cause they want your tapes
You can't figure out your taxes, but you know every card in your deck by heart
Sleep? Isn't that an insufficient substitute for Inuyasha?
You know who Hamtaro is and why he must die
You know the Laws of Anime (www.abcb.com/laws/index.htm) by heart
You've read this list http://www.issendai.com/silliness/toomuchanime.htm
And this one: www.abcb.com/misc/latt_03.htm
You know who's picture is at the top of that page
You've flunked english but you and yoru friends have long conversations about bishonen hentai
You know you've been watching too much anime when your dreams are in Japanese with subtitles. (Not me, but I know someone who swears that this happens to him on a regular basis)
You become the avatar of an anime goddess
You actually know the incantations for Dragon Slave, Giga Slave and Laguna Blade off by heart.
You and a group of friends assign roles to each other so that you can recreate the series in real life (my sister and her crew actually did this)
You sing the theme song to an anime--in perfect Japanese--while in the shower.
Or in church, instead of the hymns. Most animes have religious overtones anyway, don't they?
In fact, you sing them pretty much anywhere.
You hike all the way up to the mountains just to look for crashed Saijan spaceships.
Your action figures have action figures.
You've haunted the anime/manga shops so many times, everybody greets you by name whenever you come in, a'la Cheers.
You have actually constructed your own life-size Gundam.
The Gundam actually operates.
You actually legally change your name, preferably to that of a bishonen or bishoujo.
You named your car the Outlaw Star and your cat Aisha.
You named your car the Bebop, and your dog Ein.
You buy imported games despite the price.
The conversations between you and your friends consist solely of anime phrases.
You've been known to glare for very long periods of time when facing your enemies/rivals.
You actually face-fault.
You know more about Tenchi's extended family than your own.
You consider yourself "above" the American cartoons.
You dress up as your favorite anime character, even when a convention is nowhere in the area.
When you grow up, you want to be a miko.
You actually construct a plushie in the image of your favorite character so you could huggle them all day.
You no longer have to dye or gel your hair in order to make it look like "anime hair". By that time, it's pretty much permanent.
When you write fan fiction, everyone is startled at just how accurate your portrayal is (I've had this happen!)
You've actually memorized the entire transcript of one single anime.
You learn Japanese solely for the purpose of translating.
(and finally, because I'm running out of ideas)
Two words: Bumper stickers.
The older list:
you can speak intelligently in Japanese about spirits, demons, war, death, tournaments, magic, and profoundly soppy love affairs, but the prospect of buying a movie ticket leaves you tongue-tied.
"hai," "baka," and "hentai" come to your lips so easily that sometimes you have difficulty remembering what the English words are.
none of your friends study Japanese, but thanks to you, they all have 50-word vocabularies.
and if they used them in front of their moms, they'd get their mouths washed out with soap.
you go native, to the point of buying Japanese rice in 20-pound bags and clearing all of the furniture out of your living room so you can sit on the floor.
it's 3 am, and you and your best friend are on the brink of a fistfight over whether Ranma-chan or Ranma-kun is cuter.
you have a Ranma outfit.
and so does your significant other.
you're keeping an eye on your little sister for signs of slacking off during school, making eyes at the school's only bishonen, and disappearing suspiciously often for "slumber parties," because if she becomes a magic girl, you want in on the action.
your friends stage an intervention.
but only because they want your tapes.
some poor ex-mugger still hears the words "LEKKA SHINEN!" in his nightmares.
you never bothered getting your new apartment hooked up to cable, and even Babylon 5 is a take-it-or-leave-it thing but anyone who gets in the way of your mission to get the next Slayers volume is dead.
only, if you'd written the last sentence, you would have worded it, ``Anyone who gets in my way is Nakago.''
you've contemplated growing your hair long so that you can put it up in dumplings.
and you're a guy.
you feel like less of a woman because you can't put away 5,000 calories in one sitting.
you're despondent because your chances to become an anime heroine are completely shot--you can cook.
you refer to 21 as "over the hill," and get more depressed the closer that day comes; you're not ready to join the forces of evil, dammit!
it's not a bad hair day, it's a Zelgadis hair day.
your parents draw you aside and ask you whether you're a Satanist, since all of those symbols you practice drawing in your notebooks look awfully suspicious to them.
your kids think that cartoons are supposed to have writing at the bottom.
-asking your mom to record the anime on TV because during that time you in school or work.
You'll sit through an entire 4kids marathon of edited anime just because it is anime.
You grow your hair over three feet long and then are surprised when it neither styles itself nor strangles your enemies.
You keep trying to trick your cat into talking.
You tried cracking concrete with any part of your body and were honestly surprised when you got hurt.
You almost died because you thought the blood fountaining out of your body was "Just a flesh wound".
You've been punched for pointing out how small someone's C-cup breasts were.
You saw a girl naked and were suprised she did not resemble a Barbie Doll.
Hey, people bought that. I'm no longer an Otalu. Since I made money I'm now classified as a dedicated researcher.
You know you watch too much anime when...
While watching you can't help immediately thinking of three other characters with the same voice actor and comparing them to one another.
Whenever you read something your first thought is "I could turn this into a kickass anime".
When you, even for a split second, see an anime character talk to the audience and actually think they were talking to you.
When watching a new episode you call out the attacks of Pokemon/Bakugan/Digimon/etc. before the trainer does... and you're right.
You actually have to debate going to work or staying at home to watch your DVDs or play video games. And the only reason you go is to get money for more.
Anytime you heard a song an AMV plays in your head... and you know what an AMV is.
You're starting to wonder if you can become an anime character by dating a close family member.
You consider killing yourself because you can cook.
You've looked at Hentai and spent hours trying to find the girl in it, only to find out she only exists int hat one picture and not in any series.
You've memorized all the ninja handsigns.