Cut off from reality.
Tangled in ropes.
Donít want to break free.
Giving up all hopes.
Swallows the sun
My heart so gloom
Where is the fun?
Trying to survive
Searching my heart
Aiming the knife
This my friend is where we part.
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Very dark but well written poem!
One thing I noticed while reading is the flow of the poem. You're first stanza that you wrote really rolls of the tongue while you read it and it fits perfectly together. In the second stanza, it wasn't as flowing because your started with a single word (I'm not sure if that was intentional or not, but just a note). The third stanza flowed well until the last line due to its length.
DON'T GET ME WRONG!! D: I believe this is a great piece of writing and the things that I mentioned are incredibly difficult to do, but I just thought I would point them out anyway for future use (:
You're a polar bear.
Polar bears are fuzzy.
I would hug you.
Though you would not hug back
If you are wondering who this poster is, take a look at some of my older usernames!-Raiken-CmpunkKagami SamaYoko Littner
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