My first try on English “Haiku”

**Mugiwara-no-Basuke** · 08-01-2012 10:05 AM

Intro: Hey my friends. After being showed to me what Haiku is and some little search afterwards I’ll try that form of Japanese poetry for the first time.

Haiku combines “three different lines in a noticeable grammatical break”. That break, which is called kireji in romanji, “is often replaced with commas or hyphens in English Haiku”, which is the style I’m gonna post here

Haiku“usually includes nature and everyday things and situations”, therefore with simple themes, so I hope that at least some of you who read (and enjoy) my poem try to do one of their own, that’d be nice

However, the short number of verses((3) per strophe and also the short and limited number of syllables per verse (5/7/5) are the major difficulties (I think) to write inHaiku.

That being, and bearing in mind this is only my first poem, I didn’t respect it 100% (the number of syllables that I counted in each verse are between parenthesis), making it to sound more melodic and with better and/or more rhymes than usual Haiku.

Source (I’d say it’s almost perfect for beginners but with too short information for average Haiku “users”.):

(I'll add the link in less than 8 hours)

But I couldn’t finish this intro without giving my special thanks to @Grell Loves Jozette , for showing me what Haiku is and for insisting that I should try it

Thanks a lot friend

Whether you liked or not, please shareyour opinions!

Nature: I breath it! (5)
I breath the flowers fine scent (7)
It’s peace, it’s tasty my friend (7)

Nature: I breath it! (5)
I breath it’s delicate breeze (7)
From sea it comes: please never cease! (7)

Nature: Perfect and serene (7)
It’s simply gorgeous, I mean (7)
In peace, I now fall asleep (7)

Nature, it’s everlasting! (7)
But my Haiku is a rose (7)
The sooner it flourishes (7)
The sooner it vanishes (7)

The "normal"/usual Haiku has 5-7-5 syllables per strophe, having each 3 verses.
As you can see my first three strophes have 5-7-7 (2 first) and 7-7-7, so it’s stable but still far from the "good Haiku". As well, I added the last strophe with 4 verses and 7-7-7-7 to make it sound more like an end.