Chick Norris!

[GaHoolianGirl100]

A place for any Chuck Norris jokes you can dig up!I am on a Chuck Norris joke kick,so I decided here would be a good place to get it out of my system.Here I,even have one for you:

If Chuck Norris dislikes you,you're already dead.

[Derrick Remon]

Spelling wasn't my thing either.

[Dreruto]

Chuck Norris is so tough that he asked for a big mac from buger king and got one

[Albear]

Man.... Chuck Norris jokes may defy physics and break fourth walls, but they sound so dumb. I don't see him popping out of my monitor and slamming my face on the keybdjhytinnfhpkx.

[GaHoolianGirl100]

Sorry for the spelling thing.Working on a tablet,so typos are easy to make,and I can't edit the thread.

Another ChUck Norris joke,made by a friend.

"Chuck Norris doesn't fall on the floor saying 'Boof!',the floor falls on Chuck Norris saying 'Boof!' "

[Forbichi]

Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon

[Steven21088]

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris can kill 2 stones with 1 bird.

Chuck Norris once beat Halo 3 on Legendary with a guitar hero controller.

Chuck Norris' seamen leaked into an oil tank one sunday afternoon we now know this as Optimus Prime.

[aerophobia]

Once, chuck norris cut down half a forest with a chainsaw before he realized it had an engine that can be turned on.

Chuck Norris can infiltrate a highly secure russian military base wearing nothing but light up sketchers and a sun chips bag

Chuck Norris doesn't swim, he just beats the crap out of the water until it takes him where he wants to go

Chuck Norris brings a knife to a knife fight so his opponent can have 2

Chuck norris won a d1 drift event in a smart car. With no wheels. or body. come to think of it he was just running sideways and making screeching noises.

If chuck norris were a spartan, the movie would be called "1".

The nun-chuck is a weapon actually invented by chuck norris. Its name comes from the correct answer to chucks usual question "how many lives shall i spare today"

In high school, chuck norris would put "kick me" signs on his back, in hopes that somebody would take the bait.

When The Rock asks "can you smell what the rock is cookin?" Chuck Norris answers "It better be my lunch B**ch"

The first rule of fight club is DO NOT tell chuck norris about fight club

Chuck norris has had sex many times but hasn't lost his virginity. Thats because chuck norris never loses

When chuck norris plays nazi zombies, its the zombies that try to survive

Fear of spiders-arachnaphobia
fear of tight spaces- chlaustrophobia
fear of chuck norris- logic

chuck norris's right and left legs are called Law and order... & what hangs inbetween he calls the special victims unit.

Chuck norris once had a yard sale of his old childhood items such as his baby rattle, frisbee, and his class ring. We now know these lucky buyers as Thor, Captain America, and the green lantern.

A policeman pulled chuck norris over once, chuck let him off with a warning

Chuck norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his living room. The bear isnt dead, its just afraid to move.

When chuck norris left his parents house to go to college, he told his dad.. you're the man of the house now

My son left his chuck norris action figure in my daughters room. Now all her barbies are pregnant

The found chuck norris' diary. It's now known as the book of world records.

The worlds top scientists are in a debate. Some of them say because there is only one chuck norris he should be put on the endangered species list. However, most of the scientists agree that because there is only one chuck norris everything else in the world should be put on the endangered species list.

[Ensifer]

[Folter]

Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because he is afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
The reason space exists is because it can't handle being on the same planet as Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris won The Game.
Chuck Norris doesn't breath, he holds air hostage.

[Explorer Oak]

There is no such thing as global warming, Chuck norris got cold so he turned up the sun.

[Mugiwara-no-Basuke]

There is no such thing as a Chuck Norris joke, only a Chuck Norris fact, because if you joke about Chuck Norris you would be dead!!! :P

[AnimeBboy]

After seeing this I can't do chuck norris joke anymore

[Thefringedninja]

After seeing this I can't do chuck norris joke anymore

Man, he's got a hairy chest!

[xMaTTx]

[Aleyna]

[Kaleohano]

chuck norris couldn't even out-rap Abe Lincoln

[✞GrimStride✞]

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is in hiding.