I want an Asian Boyfriend! :D

[animegirl2365]

Hello,
I'm a 15 year old girl and I just started high school.
I'm black and I'm interested in dating outside my race.
I really like Asian guys and found them attractive since I was little.

But I have one problem, I live in an all black neighborhood.
What should i do?
Should I still try to pursue this or should I just give up and wait till college?

*I have no other problems but that.I'm pretty (in my opinion) smart and have a nice personality. Also I like all races of guys. I just basically want to date more races besides black guys. *

[marvelangga]

Kids these days...

[Meenah]

Finish college, with a stable job, and then find all the guys you want as a boyfriend. They're not a necessity in life, but your education is so why are you rushing to get a boyfriend? Are you in a hurry and worried that you'll run out of time to find one? It doesn't apply to you but those who are also in a hurry to find a partner. Boyfriend or girlfriend isn't that important, you won't run out of time of loose any guy or girl for not having one.

Be damn honest, and from the bottom of my heart, I love my fiance. But between him and education, I pick education first. I wasn't looking at all when he and I were just friends. In other words, we "dated" only to know each other. I don't call him a boyfriend or allowed him to call me his girlfriend, I went steady from our friendship to know him a little better. As I said, I was not looking for anyone. I wanted to finish high school and date right after college, well you know things change.

Where I'm getting at, school is your priority. Boyfriend or girlfriend is just a distraction, plus you're too young for those kind of things too. Number two, in my experience, Asian guys aren't too great. Most I've encountered, they're too flirtatious and plays with your emotion.

[animegirl2365]

Finish college, with a stable job, and then find all the guys you want as a boyfriend. They're not a necessity in life, but your education is so why are you rushing to get a boyfriend? Are you in a hurry and worried that you'll run out of time to find one? It doesn't apply to you but those who are also in a hurry to find a partner. Boyfriend or girlfriend isn't that important, you won't run out of time of loose any guy or girl for not having one.

Be damn honest, and from the bottom of my heart, I love my fiance. But between him and education, I pick education first. I wasn't looking at all when he and I were just friends. In other words, we "dated" only to know each other. I don't call him a boyfriend or allowed him to call me his girlfriend, I went steady from our friendship to know him a little better. As I said, I was not looking for anyone. I wanted to finish high school and date right after college, well you know things change.

Where I'm getting at, school is your priority. Boyfriend or girlfriend is just a distraction, plus you're too young for those kind of things too. Number two, in my experience, Asian guys aren't too great. Most I've encountered, they're too flirtatious and plays with your emotion.

I totally understand where your coming from and I would never put a relationship before my education. I'm not really looking for anything really serious.

---------- Post added at 12:47 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:44 AM ----------

How low are you to only want to date someone because of their race? You find them attractive but that doesn't mean they are compatible with you.... Really...... I hope you find the most crappiest asian bf >_>

P.S. most asian parents are strict probably wouldn't agree with your race and probably wouldn't let their son date you. Asians are still momma and poppa's boy/girl.

Go to college, maybe you'll find one there that isn't a hermit or a wannabe badAz or isn't afraid to date a black person (which most asians are one of the 3 that I know)

Sad cold truth.

I like all races of people. I don't mind what color they are at long as the have a good personality and heart I'm perfectly fine. I'm sure not all Asian parents are like that and also I'm not your average black person. I defeat all the stereotypes...mostly..[COLOR="Silver"]

---------- Post added at 01:32 AM ---------- Previous post was at 01:22 AM ----------

@animegirl2365 although everyone seems to be telling you to focus on school, you're 15! I know when I was 15 I was only only interested in 3 things: boys, boys and more BOYS! Is there a reason you don't want to date other black guys? Like maybe you have been disappointed in them or just think someone from another culture would be interesting?

My advice though is that given your situation it sounds like it might be hard for you to meet other races at the moment. So be patient. And honestly, when it comes to real love, it won't matter if they are black, white or rainbow coloured

Thanks for understanding me.
I have no problem with dating black guys, just not the ones in my city.
I live in the (hood) basically.
Most of the boys at my school or the datable( cute ones) either smoke weed are in gangs or are whores. (Guys who have to many girls and don't wanna choose just one)
I would love to date a cute black guy that wasn't ghetto, didn't smoke weed wasn't in a gang and didn't have so many girls.
But sadly that's hard to find where I live.
I like all races of guys I just particularly want to date an Asian guy.
Oh and to make this clear to everyone, I'm not just going to date someone because their Asian. The have to have a good personality and morals as well just like everyone else.

[blueangel06661]

How low are you to only want to date someone because of their race? You find them attractive but that doesn't mean they are compatible with you.... Really...... I hope you find the most crappiest asian bf >_>

P.S. most asian parents are strict probably wouldn't agree with your race and probably wouldn't let their son date you. Asians are still momma and poppa's boy/girl.

Go to college, maybe you'll find one there that isn't a hermit or a wannabe badAz or isn't afraid to date a black person (which most asians are one of the 3 that I know)

Sad cold truth.

[Genghis Beatrix]

@blueangel06661 Tell that to Tiger Woods' parents.

[Xeyuzio]

P.S. most asian parents are strict probably wouldn't agree with your race and probably wouldn't let their son date you. Asians are still momma and poppa's boy/girl.

Oh, I didn't know you lived with Asian people and that you know that they're strict, surely this isn't a stereotype, heavens no. Last time I checked you guys this was about the OP's life, not yours, if you're not going to help her then ignore her. People have preferences, so do I and I'm sure the rest of you do too. Anyways @OP I can't really help you with your problem, I'm Spaniard/Mexican, not to mention I won't date someone who I hardly know online.

[blueangel06661]

Oh, I didn't know you lived with Asian people and that you know that they're strict, surely this isn't a stereotype, heavens no. Last time I checked you guys this was about the OP's life, not yours, if you're not going to help her then ignore her. People have preferences, so do I and I'm sure the rest of you do too. Anyways @OP I can't really help you with your problem, I'm Spaniard/Mexican, not to mention I won't date someone who I hardly know online.

Too bad I can't read what you said since you don't know how to pick a color....

P.S. it's not a sterotype, dark skin in Asian cultures is looked down upon as it means you work in the sun and are "dirty".... It's why people try to hard to have lighter skin in asian countries.

[Xeyuzio]

P.S. it's not a sterotype, dark skin in Asian cultures is looked down upon as it means you work in the sun and are "dirty".... It's why people try to hard to have lighter skin in asian countries.

I don't believe we live in an Asian country and I'm almost positive neither does the OP.

[blueangel06661]

I don't believe we live in an Asian country and I'm almost positive neither does the OP.

Well OP wants an Asian BF... Pretty much every Asian parent I've ever met is strict and particular about this. I have quite a few asian friends. None dared to invite any darker skinned friends to their house, much less date one. One never invited ANYONE to his house... I only went since I just showed up at their door without a care in the world. His house was a few houses away from my property.

Not to mention she wants to date someone only because of their race.. It's kind of stupid... It's like saying "You're a jerk and you physically abuse me but you're Asian and attractive so lets date" or "you suck as a boyfriend, you never leave the house, always on the computer, but since you're Asian it's totally okay for our relationship to suffer just because I like your race". Makes me wonder if she even knows anything about their culture other than they look hot to her....

..... Stupid is what stupid does.... The op... kinda stupid and immature... Oh they are 15 [just scrolled up] go figure... No wonder she even considered the option to date and not go to school or to go to school and not date.. DA FUQ?!

[Xeyuzio]

Well OP wants an Asian BF... Pretty much every Asian parent I've ever met is strict and particular about this. I have quite a few asian friends. None dared to invite any darker skinned friends to their house, much less date one. One never invited ANYONE to his house... I only went since I just showed up at their door without a care in the world. His house was a few houses away from my property.

Not to mention she wants to date someone only because of their race.. It's kind of stupid... It's like saying "You're a jerk and you physically abuse me but you're Asian and attractive so lets date" or "you suck as a boyfriend, you never leave the house, always on the computer, but since you're Asian it's totally okay for our relationship to suffer just because I like your race". Makes me wonder if she even knows anything about their culture other than they look hot to her....

..... Stupid is what stupid does.... The op... kinda stupid and immature... Oh they are 15 [just scrolled up] go figure... No wonder she even considered the option to date and not go to school or to go to school and not date.. DA FUQ?!

Weird, all the Asian people I've been around don't seem to mined darker skinned people (I'm sure it's just new Asian people who come into the country that might have a problem with this), neither have their parents. Besides I'm sure if an Asian guy is willing to date her then that could mean he likes her more than her parents which is be a good, I could give a crap about what parents say, I date who I want to. Oh yeah, I said this before but I think people are allowed to have preferences & make their own choices, if she thinks she messed up then that's her fault and not ours. Seriously though, why post in a thread if you're not going to help? Seems kind of pointless to me.

Edit: By the way, she didn't say she wanted to stop school, she just said she wanted to see if she should wait until college to date an Asian guy, you should probably read threads before you post in them.

[Datenshi]

Too bad I can't read what you said since you don't know how to pick a color....

P.S. it's not a sterotype, dark skin in Asian cultures is looked down upon as it means you work in the sun and are "dirty".... It's why people try to hard to have lighter skin in asian countries.

Wait, what? The ignorance you display in that post is staggering.

First of all (and this includes the original poster), you can't group all "Asian cultures" into one like that. To say someone is "Asian", by itself, says virtually nothing. To start with, there are Japanese, Chinese, and Korean peoples, to take a few, with different languages, different religions, different traditions and customs, different histories, and different genealogies.

I'm not denying that certain stereotypes may hold a grain of truth, but it makes no sense to group "Asian" people together to make generalizations. A Chinese person or a Korean person would tend to stick out from the crowd in Japan from the way they spoke or acted, just as a Japanese person would probably stick out in other Asian countries.

To start making generalizations about what "Asian" people are like would be like saying that people from the U.K., Canada, France, Germany, Russia, and the U.S. are all "X" because they are all predominantly Caucasian in race. Each country has their own distinct histories and national traits, not to mention wildly different dialects and habits. Or do we all "look alike" enough to you superficially that you never bothered to note the difference?

As to your point about "asian countries" wanting lighter skin; tanning salons were and are still quite popular in Japan, and if you'd actually been here you'd see that many of the celebrities that are glamorized on television and magazines are quite tanned in complexion, so I really don't know what you're talking about. Perhaps that may hold true in, say, certain rural areas in certain Asian countries, but as I already said, you can't then say that all "asian countries" are like that. It makes no sense.

[animeyay]

I think you should concentrate a bit more on your school for now.

I have a friend whose situation is similar to yours (a black girl attracted to Asian guys), and I can't describe how rough her love life has been.

[Yuuchun]

Guys she's a young girl...just because she made not such a wise decision/question it doesn't mean you can attack her like that. Let's keep these questionable statements about race out of this discussion...it's not going to help anyone. Meanwhile to the OP...like some people have said it's best you focus on your education let things like love and relationship come by naturally and in a healthy way. Of course, you can have a boyfriend while in school it's a healthy process of life but remember to prioritize your things. Also I know that you might admire Asian culture and want to become closer to it, but don't let that be the sole reason why your having a relationship with someone. If you truly cherish your significant other it won't matter what race he is what will matter is the honesty and love in the relationship. Also don't be in a rush to get a boyfriend ^^v there are a lot more things out there than just boyfriends and relationships.

[SuXrys]

Read this thread and I don't understand you guys.

I understand that just because you are looking for something "on the outside" of a person that doesn't mean that you will be compatible with that person... However it's natural that you do find some things more attractive then others. So what if she wants a asian boyfriend??? Maybe asians are the only type of person that she finds attractive "in that way"? I don't understand why people in here takes this so offense or why some says that "she made not such a wise decision". Decision?? People find different things attractive, and just because they "click" with someone doesn't mean that they find them sexual attractive. Some falls for asians, other for latinamericans, others can fall for pretty much everyone as long as they have the right personality and so on and so on - but that doesn't mean that all the others that doesn't find every "race" sexual attractive have made a "stupid decision". (it's not a decision).

---------- Post added at 11:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:25 PM ----------

Its kinda shallow wanting to date someone just because of their race... One could even say thats racist.

No, it doesn't have to be racist, or even shallow. Don't overuse those words - then they will lose their meaning.

[Yuuchun]

Read this thread and I don't understand you guys.

I understand that just because you are looking for something "on the outside" of a person that doesn't mean that you will be compatible with that person... However it's natural that you do find some things more attractive then others. So what if she wants a asian boyfriend??? Maybe asians are the only type of person that she finds attractive "in that way"? I don't understand why people in here takes this so offense or why some says that "she made not such a wise decision". Decision?? People find different things attractive, and just because they "click" with someone doesn't mean that they find them sexual attractive. Some falls for asians, other for latinamericans, others can fall for pretty much everyone as long as they have the right personality and so on and so on - but that doesn't mean that all the others that doesn't find every "race" sexual attractive have made a "stupid decision". (it's not a decision).

---------- Post added at 11:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:25 PM ----------

No, it doesn't have to be racist, or even shallow. Don't overuse those words - then they will lose their meaning.

Perhaps I read her message wrong, but from what I got is that she wanted a boyfriend more as an "commodity" than for the sake of a relationship...I am not sure how to word this correctly. But I do get where your coming from. But at the same time physical traits are superficial and perhaps should only be the initial start and not the entire process. And what do you mean it's not a decision?

I think your seeing the asian part as their cultural point of view and I rather saw it as in she was attracted to Asians because solely of their physical traits. I am sorry if I am not making any sense...I shouldn't be arguing things when I haven't had sleep for the past two days.

[SuXrys]

But at the same time physical traits are superficial and perhaps should only be the initial start and not the entire process. And what do you mean it's not a decision?

It's not a decision in that way that you can't decide over your own sexual preferences. You can't decide if you are homosexual or straight, in the same way you don't decide if you for example only find asians sexual attactive. It's just the way your body works, your brain can't control or change how that work.

So just because someone wants a partner of a certain "race" that doesn't mean that they are shallow or racist.

I think your seeing the asian part as their cultural point of view and I rather saw it as in she was attracted to Asians because solely of their physical traits.

I am only talking about the physical traits.

I shouldn't be arguing things when I haven't had sleep for the past two days.

Lols, why on earth havn't you slept for two days?? Go to bed! ;D

[Yuuchun]

It's not a decision in that way that you can't decide over your own sexual preferences. You can't decide if you are homosexual or straight, in the same way you don't decide if you for example only find asians sexual attactive. It's just the way your body works, your brain can't control or change how that work.

So just because someone wants a partner of a certain "race" that doesn't mean that they are shallow or racist.

I am only talking about the physical traits.

Lols, why on earth havn't you slept for two days?? Go to bed! ;D

Well I guess each ideology to their own...but I do think you can decide your sexual preferences at the least what you find aesthetically pleasing. I am not sure if this is the best comparison for the occasion but you can replace the opposite sex for like a beautiful (or not so beautiful) piece of artwork. You just don't automatically think it's beautiful for no reason or that it was just an innate thing. Your own past experiences and decisions shaped up your idea of ideal aesthetics...I mean true some things might be "built in" but I don't think they are so innate that they are sort of like programs on a robot. As for the homosexuality and etc...that can be taken so many ways which I can't really argue because I don't know enough about this topic.

I am only talking about the physical traits.

I still feel like we are not viewing this with the same view...I haven't slept for two days because it's midterms...so I am studying/doing homework like there's no tomorrow. Thank god tomorrow is friday :3

[Wio]

Read this thread and I don't understand you guys.

I understand that just because you are looking for something "on the outside" of a person that doesn't mean that you will be compatible with that person... However it's natural that you do find some things more attractive then others. So what if she wants a asian boyfriend??? Maybe asians are the only type of person that she finds attractive "in that way"? I don't understand why people in here takes this so offense or why some says that "she made not such a wise decision". Decision?? People find different things attractive, and just because they "click" with someone doesn't mean that they find them sexual attractive. Some falls for asians, other for latinamericans, others can fall for pretty much everyone as long as they have the right personality and so on and so on - but that doesn't mean that all the others that doesn't find every "race" sexual attractive have made a "stupid decision". (it's not a decision).

---------- Post added at 11:26 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:25 PM ----------

No, it doesn't have to be racist, or even shallow. Don't overuse those words - then they will lose their meaning.

Treating people differently based on race is discrimination. I can only speak for myself and some of my (male) friends, but sexual attraction is not set in stone for us. Many initially unattractive characteristics can be overcome, and some are harder to overlook than others, but race is an easier one. Being picky about race is fine when you're looking for porn, but when you're looking for a relationships it is pretty shallow. Maybe the guys I know just happen to have lower standards and more open minds.

[SuXrys]

Treating people differently based on race is discrimination. I can only speak for myself and some of my (male) friends, but sexual attraction is not set in stone for us. Many initially unattractive characteristics can be overcome, and some are harder to overlook than others, but race is an easier one. Being picky about race is fine when you're looking for porn, but when you're looking for a relationships it is pretty shallow. Maybe the guys I know just happen to have lower standards and more open minds.

Yes treating people differently based on race is discrimination, but that also depends on what we are talking about when we are talking about "treating". Someones sexual preferences isn't discrimination. That is using that word wrong.

If it really where racist then sure a lot of people would be racists, in fact every person that have thanked no to a date with a person that doesn't share the same skin colour as themselves (no matter the reason why they thanked no in the first place).

---------- Post added at 12:23 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:19 AM ----------

Well I guess each ideology to their own...but I do think you can decide your sexual preferences at the least what you find aesthetically pleasing. I am not sure if this is the best comparison for the occasion but you can replace the opposite sex for like a beautiful (or not so beautiful) piece of artwork. You just don't automatically think it's beautiful for no reason or that it was just an innate thing. Your own past experiences and decisions shaped up your idea of ideal aesthetics...I mean true some things might be "built in" but I don't think they are so innate that they are sort of like programs on a robot. As for the homosexuality and etc...that can be taken so many ways which I can't really argue because I don't know enough about this topic.

But someone can not be forced to like a certain piece of artwork. Someone can grow to like it in time yes, but that doesn't have to happen. Some will still think that that paiting is not as beautiful as some other painting, but that doesn't mean that we must/can look down at their taste in art.

Thank god tomorrow is friday :3

You have no idea! :3

[Yuuchun]

Yes treating people differently based on race is discrimination, but that also depends on what we are talking about when we are talking about "treating". Someones sexual preferences isn't discrimination. That is using that word wrong.

If it really where racist then sure a lot of people would be racists, in fact every person that have thanked no to a date with a person that doesn't share the same skin colour as themselves (no matter the reason why they thanked no in the first place).

---------- Post added at 12:23 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:19 AM ----------


But someone can not be forced to like a certain piece of artwork. Someone can grow to like it in time yes, but that doesn't have to happen. Some will still think that that paiting is not as beautiful as some other painting, but that doesn't mean that we must/can look down at their taste in art.


You have no idea! :3

Well~ I wasn't trying to be condescending towards the OP. I just think that "falling in love" with someone just because they're Asian without a deeper root behind it is rather too much of a gamble. I won't deny that I do look at physical traits when I look at someone I like but at least to me he must be just more than beautiful...I want to know his values, his ideologies, his journey and etc. Of course that we cannot force things upon people. I guess all I want to say is look deeper than just the skin and bones. u____u; I better stop before this turns into a sappy story about what I find attractive...

LOL All I can think is spring break is coming after 11am on friday.

[Wio]

Yes treating people differently based on race is discrimination, but that also depends on what we are talking about when we are talking about "treating". Someones sexual preferences isn't discrimination. That is using that word wrong.

If it really where racist then sure a lot of people would be racists, in fact every person that have thanked no to a date with a person that doesn't share the same skin colour as themselves (no matter the reason why they thanked no in the first place).

Fear and hatred are just as much out of our control as sexual preference, so you could just as well say people who harbor these feelings towards certain races aren't racist. In the end it's about what you actually decide to do in spite of these feelings right? When you say you want an Asian Boyfriend it changes from just a feeling to a deliberate action.

[Munchman]

Its kinda shallow wanting to date someone just because of their race... One could even say thats racist.

[Jasanime]

@animegirl2365 although everyone seems to be telling you to focus on school, you're 15! I know when I was 15 I was only only interested in 3 things: boys, boys and more BOYS! Is there a reason you don't want to date other black guys? Like maybe you have been disappointed in them or just think someone from another culture would be interesting?

I think there's nothing wrong with wanting an Asian bf, I mean Asian guys are HOT, and how many guys say they want an Asian girlfriend?!

My advice though is that given your situation it sounds like it might be hard for you to meet other races at the moment. So be patient. And honestly, when it comes to real love, it won't matter if they are black, white or rainbow coloured :-)

[Meenah]

I don't know, am I the few people who are not looking at the race? It's not the issue, it's just dating in general. Perhaps race is secondary or the least issue. Just to simply put it as this: school is way more important than finding love. Have to be all smart at least, right? You'll just be irritating to say: you can be well educated, but be dumb when you find someone to love. It's a different story. After all the poster is 15.