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Thread: When should someone start settling down?

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    Question When should someone start settling down?

    Everybody has different opinions on the subject. Some people never want to settle down, some want to settle down right away. Some people just want to date around for a few years and then settle down. Do you think there is any set length of time someone should go before settling down? I understand some of you will be "I don't care what other people do" so if that is the case, just give your own personal beliefs on settling down.


    I personally wish I was older so I could settle down now. I don't like the idea of a party life style or being with multiple people. It doesn't seem fulfilling to me. I want to just be in a long lasting relationship. I meet the "perfect" girl and I go all Rick Astley on them. Thats just me though.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    One should only do this when one is ready, settling down before one is ready will only case unease and a crushing feeling of unachievement a feeling that you have done nothing in your life and more than likely this will case problems down the road.
    Last edited by Meteorkeeper; 04-19-2011 at 04:13 PM.
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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    define settling down

    ^by Hakuchuumu^

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    settle down: (v) - to begin a stable, orderly, and often conventional way of life.
    Of course, asking when you would settle down would imply that you were not doing so before.

    I've NEVER been that partying type, but I cannot say that my way of life is stable. When my life will stabilize, I don't know, but I suppose that will begin when I get out of school and start a career.
    Last edited by Kusuke; 04-19-2011 at 03:01 PM.


    When faced with an existence so great, one becomes blind to everything and experiences only fear...

    人は平等ではない。不平等は悪ではない。平等は悪だ。そう、人は差別されるためにある。だからこそ人は争い 、競い合い、そこに進歩が生まれる。 

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Whenever I find the right person I suppose, when That will be I dunno but still perhaps it will be closer than I think or further away

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Hmm.. I guess that would depends on what a person prefers. Like you have clearly implied you'd rather be stable. But of course not right away, because the couple will need some time to actually test each other and themselves. If both can get through everything together and think they are perfect for each other, then both should think about settling down.

    As for me, I remain single, because I want to enjoy the freedom before committing. So the right time to settle in for me, would be after I get a stable career, saved up quite enough, and fulfilled most of my 'goals'. I agree with long lasting relationships, and I plan or at least wish to have that, so before then, I will live my life to the fullest without limitations. Then my cat lady self can settle xD


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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    I guess when I'm stable with myself to begin with, and not with a person but in general. Like I've finished college, I have a good job that can help me, good credits, etc. All those good things. Be married with a decent guy (hopefully with my current boyfriend, because I honestly feel like he's the one for me) that I am sure that I'll have no problems with, see if I'm still stable I will have children. That deal, I want to just be plain and simple in my life and thats how I'll settle down. Again thats the things I want for myself, and I personally think that anyone should do what they want if they feel good about it. As long they're not a burden to the society or anything, thats cool. ;P

    Live a positive straight-forward life~ I'm aware thats easier said than done. Well, you know. Lol, trying matters.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    When your dreams become the dreams of a married person.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    I will start settling down when I feel like settling down, so definitely not right now 'cause currently I'm thoroughly enjoying my single life.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Its not really a matter of when you yourself wants to settle down, but when both of you are able and willing to settle down.

    The whole "settling down" term is vague, so its hard to respond.
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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    when you get someone pregnant/get orrrr when you feel like it




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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Well if you're smart; when you're ready, duh. Most people don't "settle down" til much later than the media portrays.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    oh, ok. I think I get what the question is now.

    as to when it should be attained? matter of choice I guess.

    me personally? never. I'll keep moving forward right up until the day I die.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    That depends on what's normal for you, and what's right for you. Screw the rest of the world. I'm not ready. I'm not financially stable. I don't have anyone to setle down with, and don't like a lot of the people I meet. I'm a weirdo compared to other rural Texans, who are all married by age 20 with families on the way. I want to give my family better than what I got - not that I had a hard life or anything - and I just can't see myself doing that any time soon. I can't see it happening in this city either.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Settling down? It's one of those very assumptive terms much like hometown. My parents probably moved around, switched jobs, traveled, etc. more while married and with children than they did single. They weren't party types because they don't drink.

    I could try to break it down I guess?
    Partying: Never
    Marriage: Never
    Children: Hopefully
    Living in the same home for the rest of my life: Hopefully (ASAP)

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Hmmm, I wouldn't settle down unless I really had to. So basically only if I'm getting married. Even then I'd still want to go out. I think settling down is more for when you have children.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    settle down: (v) - to being a stable, orderly, and often conventional way of life.

    I'll go with this definition for right now.

    In all honesty though, the kind of lifestyle that entails has always translated as being terribly boring for me.

    While I certainly have nothing against anyone who would want that, and more power to you if that's how you are, but I can't imagine ever finding real satisfaction in it. To always be on the move, discovering newer and greater things with which to make me feel alive; that is the kind of lifestyle I seek.

    For those that do wish to "settle down" however, I couldn't really say one way or the other when the right time is. Putting aside such necessities as a steady career, a happy and fulfilling marriage (hopefully), and everything else that's entailed; I'd say it's more on an instinctual level. Either you know you're ready or you don't. If there are still things out there that you want to do that you know you couldn't settle down without going at it, then you'll definitely come to regret it on some degree later on.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Whenever they damn well feel like it sonny.
    Me, I think I'll be letting these tired old bones rest sooner rather then later.
    I mean I've seen the world, both it's beautiful side and it's ugly side.
    Made a few friends, a few more enemies...
    There's a lot of different people out there.

    You really gotta experience life before you settle down though son,
    some things are out there just waiting to be explored.
    Don't yer go rushing into settling down with the first girl you meet and you'll do fine.
    victoria aut mors

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    start settling down when both parties are prepared. and financial condition is stable or better.

    ill start settling down maybe after having a warships.. lol

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Quote Originally Posted by Shinn Kamiyra View Post
    In all honesty though, the kind of lifestyle that entails has always translated as being terribly boring for me.

    While I certainly have nothing against anyone who would want that, and more power to you if that's how you are, but I can't imagine ever finding real satisfaction in it. To always be on the move, discovering newer and greater things with which to make me feel alive; that is the kind of lifestyle I seek.
    I'm not sure what fake satisfaction is, but judging on what you consider "real" satisfaction let me tell you that it is probably superior. Fake satisfaction does not require that you buy anything from anyone, which is probably why you have bought into the lie that it is insufficient, non-existent, or whatever word you use to dismiss it.

    Amusement is a very easy thing to come by. It's such a shame that our culture puts a negative connotation on the term "easily amused" when in reality is an excellent quality and far superior to it's opposing counterpart "easily bored".

    Be careful Shinn, because the best propaganda is the kind that is not obvious. You don't need to be on the move to discover new things, it's just that being on the move makes someone else money, and those powers thus want you to be on the move. What they are hoping you never realize is that you would have been satisfied all along. Satisfaction is completely contingent on attitude rather than behavior. Though I won't say satisfaction is the end goal.


    On a side note, I have never observed a happy and fulfilling marriage. The best I've seen is a "Not so bad" marriage.

  25. #21
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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Quote Originally Posted by Wio
    I'm not sure what fake satisfaction is, but judging on what you consider "real" satisfaction let me tell you that it is probably superior. Fake satisfaction does not require that you buy anything from anyone, which is probably why you have bought into the lie that it is insufficient, non-existent, or whatever word you use to dismiss it.

    For the moment, let’s just say that fake satisfaction is a kind of satisfaction that you go out of your way to believe that you’re satisfied with; or, for simplicity’s sake, we can just say you’re lying to yourself.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wio
    Amusement is a very easy thing to come by. It's such a shame that our culture puts a negative connotation on the term "easily amused" when in reality is an excellent quality and far superior to it's opposing counterpart "easily bored".

    Be careful Shinn, because the best propaganda is the kind that is not obvious. You don't need to be on the move to discover new things, it's just that being on the move makes someone else money, and those powers thus want you to be on the move. What they are hoping you never realize is that you would have been satisfied all along. Satisfaction is completely contingent on attitude rather than behavior. Though I won't say satisfaction is the end goal.

    Hrm… perhaps I was a bit misspoken earlier. When I say “to be on the move,” I don’t mean to imply that in a literal sense such as traveling or anything commonplace like that, though that is certainly appealing in its own right from time to time, but rather not to be constrained to a set of circumstances that make my everyday life dull or predictability; to have a certain unpredictability and excitement in that I’ll be able to discover something new is more along the lines of what I meant. Even if I don’t end up doing so, the possibility still exists and I’m engaging in something that exists beyond the realm of my understanding. One might say that falls more in line with what you said about satisfaction being contingent on attitude rather than behavior.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wio
    On a side note, I have never observed a happy and fulfilling marriage. The best I've seen is a "Not so bad" marriage.
    Truthfully, neither have I.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    Honestly, I don't feel like I'm gonna be settling down for a while. I want to focus on my Filmmaking, which will require travel at one point or another, and that will be hard if I have kids and what not! I think my high twenties or even mid thirties is when I plan on settling down.

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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    In my opinion the best time to settle down is when your PREPARED. You may be ready to settle down but are you PREPARED? do you have a steady job that makes money, and i dont mean working as a cashier or waitress somewhere. My boyfriend wants to settle down and have kids already...and im only 21. I know in this day and age thats old enough but i wasnt raised that way. I know i'm not ready to settle down. Im in debt, I keep dropping out of college. I know im mentally ready to be a mother...i been ready but you have to think ahead. Settle down when you have a great job. Like i want to get my degree in video editing after i become a certified wedding planner. Money money money is the key to things in this economy.

    So remember even if you KNOW your ready, think about the money and ALSO even if someone is ready age is a factor. Im 21, yeah im ready to be a mother but im still a young adult who wants to have FUN. and i dont mean drinking till i think im a pokemon or anything i mean think about this. When your settled, ready for a family, preggy...do you think u can go on a roadtrip to the beach whenever you want? Go dancing every night? Or just have fun? Yeah over time you can do those things but to a limit. If your young...BE YOUNG. Don't settle down so fast because all those fun moments will be gone. Yeah your wife or hubby might let you do those things but when trying to start a family you cant.

    Trust me i've thought these things through when my bf asked me if we could have children. But this is just my opinion ^^

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  28. #24
    Senior Member tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari has a reputation beyond repute tesaamari's Avatar
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    Default Re: When should someone start settling down?

    the best time is when you already have a source of income which may support you and yer fam'ly, and of course when you already want it and you're ready for it...
    after school, when you already have a job or two, when you're done paying your debts and returning what you received, and when noone is depending/leaning on you...that's the time you can settle down and think for your own happiness...

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